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matthew currie astrology seduce capricornCapricorn has a reputation for being firmly in control of themselves and, as much as possible, their resources. This Sign is usually more associated with bosses and banking than with sex and seduction, but there can be something undeniably sexy about these folks. Looking to enthrall one of your very own? Read to the Introduction to the series first…

GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER: Showing a little self-control and containment is usually a good thing, but especially so with a Capricorn. Yes, you know exactly what it is you want out of the situation — and your intended Capricorn probably does too. But if despite that you managed to maintain an air of calm and self-control, Capricorn will likely find that especially sexy.

BE READY TO PRESENT YOUR RESUME: Dating a Capricorn doesn’t have to be a job interview, but Capricorn has a distinct preference for quality over quantity. Odds are good that, if you think about it, you’ve probably got a fairly sexy set of “core competencies.” Don’t brag, but don’t be afraid to let Capricorn know that you’re a solid emotional investment. Being yourself is a good thing… but knowing and projecting that is even better!

SHOW SOME CLASS, WILL YOU? Not looking like a slob and having a basic familiarity with social conventions is probably good advice all around when attempting to get someone’s attention, but especially so with a Capricorn. They’re looking for someone outstanding to be with, not “someone who sticks out” in a bad way. Be outstanding, but don’t “stand out”!

THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING DIRECT. Admittedly, if walking up to a stranger you’re attracted to and clearly stating your sexual intentions was always likely to work, you wouldn’t be needing any seduction tips. Nonetheless, once you’ve established that you are an item of interest, there’s nothing wrong with plainly stating that you are available, and you’re available now… lucky Capricorn, passing your credit application!

Finally, if you want to seduce a Capricorn, there is something you should avoid. Capricorns may like honesty, but they don’t usually like it if you are too forward. Even if you are interested in the product, no one likes a loud and pushy salesman, do they? Remember: you’re not just the salesman, you are also the product… and if you’ve got a quality product, there’s no need to corner anyone in order to seal the deal.

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Write me for details!

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matthew currie astrology rapture

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(ATTENTION BELIEFNET EDITORS: please make sure this doesn’t run until after the predicted Rapture (scheduled for this Sunday) happens — that is, if any of you are still here. It would be just plain embarrassing otherwise!)

Dear friends and regular readers:

Part of my job is to predict the future, and usually I get it right. However since I am a mere human being, my track record is not perfect. Thus, I would like to formally apologize to everyone here reading this today. I had assumed that the Rapture which was predicted to occur on September 23rd of this year wasn’t going to happen, as so many other Raptures and/or returns of Jesus have failed to manifest.

I knew of a psychic, one who bills herself as a good Christian, who tried to warn us all about this… and now she is presumably up in the clouds with Jesus, partying with St. Augustine and shouting “so long, suckers!” down at the rest of us. You can always tell that she was a good Christian by how often she told you she was, and about her enthusiasm for posting anything anti-Muslim on her website — in much the same way that you can tell a person is a good vegan by how loudly they shout whenever they see an ad on TV for Burger King.

Like thousands of others on Facebook and Twitter, this Christian psychic (let’s call her “Annie”) posted material claiming that, for astrological reasons, it was more or less obvious that the Biblically-predicted end of the world would begin on September 23rd of this year. Like many who are not as good a Christian as Annie, I dismissed these claims. But apparently the Book of Revelations has a verse in it indicating that this month’s New Moon was clearly indicative that the end of times had arrived. Here is the verse in question:

Revelation 12, verses 1-2 (New International Version)
A great sign appeared in heaven: a woman clothed with the Sun, with the Moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars on her head. She was pregnant and cried out in pain as she was about to give birth.

And yes, September 23rd did see a New Moon occurring at the “feet” of the constellation Virgo, with the planet Jupiter in roughly the position of Virgo’s womb (denoting “the birth or return of a King), and Virgo was also accompanied by Mercury, Venus, and Mars (which combined with the nine most prominent stars of Leo, kind-of sort-of forms “a crown of twelve stars” on Virgo’s “head.”

Foolish disbelieving me! I ran this configuration through some software and discovered that this particular combination had in fact happened at least four times in the last thousand years. Since Jesus didn’t return on any of those occasions, I naturally assumed that it would be business as usual here on Earth after this New Moon.

Furthermore, I neglected to factor in the role the planet Nibiru would play in all this. I was skeptical. I was disbelieving. I completely dismissed the possibility that the scientifically impossible planet Nibiru would suddenly spring into existence, sweep past the Earth with Jesus writing on it like a cowboy, and scoop up the few good Christians like Psychic Annie and leave the rest of us down here to suffer at the hands of the Antichrist.

Please accept my apology, dear reader. I will gladly answer any and all of your individual questions about this, but not in the next couple of days. Like you and everyone else left behind here, I’m going to be busy looting canned goods, hoarding weapons, and awaiting the mark of the beast — in exactly the same way that I presume you and everyone else out there is doing today.

(ATTENTION BELIEFNET EDITORS: In the event this article is not needed on the 24th, please save it for the predicted Apocalypse of 2022. Hope you are all safe.)

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Write me for details!

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matthew currie astrology seduce sagittariusReady for an adventure? Then why not try to strap a saddle on a Sagittarius? They have a reputation for being fun and freewheeling and, frankly, to be easier to catch than to keep. Sometimes it’s a matter of getting the Centaur’s attention, and sometimes it’s more a matter of keeping it. Either way, seduction skills (like riding lessons) will do a lot to help you keep you Sag on the trail. Start by reading the introduction to this series, then get ready to play along!

The most important rule? Show up! Ha. Okay, seriously: Sagittarius usually has a hard time hiding its enthusiasms, and if you’re one of those enthusiasms, you likely know it already. Still, no harm in putting some planning into it, is there…?

ARE WE HAVING FUN YET?: Sagittarians are often prone to serious thought and long philosophical digressions, but more often than not it’s accompanied by a firm sense of “fun.” Yes, meeting and mating are serious pursuits, but there’s absolutely no reason why they can’t have a sporting element to them. Or, as a Sagittarius might put it, “yeah I like you babe but lighten up a little, okay pal?” Romance should be fun, shouldn’t it?

YOU’VE CONVINCED ME!: It’s strange but true — you aren’t likely to see this tactic in a typical Harlequin Romance or date movie, but you can often get a Sagittarius to play along with your amorous intent by simply being straightforward about it. After all, if you’ve connected and everyone’s on the same page, what could be more fun than saying something like “hey, you know what would be a blast? If we went and got a motel room now!”

THAT’S INTERESTING. TELL ME MORE!: Some Sagittarians are more talkative than others, but they all tend to be thinkers in one way or another… and if you’ve stumbled onto one of their pet topics, they love nothing better than to go on and on — um, I mean, discuss the matter in further detail. Then feel free to raise some general questions, but not disagree too much. Or, maybe disagree as much as you want — Sag loves a good debate. Debate tonight, seduce later…?

DON’T BE AFRAID TO STRUT: Let’s be honest here: you’re looking for tips on how to seduce a Sagittarius, but you wouldn’t be engaged in such a pursuit unless you knew you had something to offer, right? No need to brag or show off, but be fully aware of what you bring to the table. Sagittarius appreciates a little swagger, and that sort of thing isn’t just for Leos anymore…

Finally, if you want to seduce a Sagittarius there is something you should avoid it all costs. You’ve heard of “horseplay”? Well, horses aren’t so playful when they have a sense that you’re baiting a trap for them. Sagittarius can be is serious and committed is anyone else, but they tend to be a little shy when it comes to signing up for a long-term contract without taking a LOT of test drives. Getting a Sagittarius is one thing, but if you want to keep one long term, don’t mention it on the first date, okay?

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the the NEW Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, and more material on blog entries!

matthew currie astrology seduce a scorpioYes, it’s absolutely true: Scorpio has the reputation for being more about the sex than any other Sign of the Zodiac. Is that a fair characterization, when the other eleven Signs seems pretty fond of it too? Maybe not. But one thing is for sure: few can play their cards closer to the vest when it comes to their feelings than Scorpio can… until they unleash the full force of their hormones, that is. If that sounds like something you want to get in on, follow these instructions (but first, check out the Introduction to this series first by clicking HERE).

ENTERING DEEP HEAD SPACE: Getting close to someone physically includes getting close to them mentally. That can be especially daunting with a Scorpio, because they have a certain appearance of natural aloofness that they use as a highly effective defense mechanism. You’ll need to get in there and find out what makes your Scorpion tick if you want to get The Big Prize.

I’LL SHOW YOU MINE…: This brings us to your mind. Specifically, a Scorpio doesn’t usually want to drop their guard around you unless you’ve done some of the same first. Don’t be surprised if it feels like you aren’t getting a whole lot of information but you yourself are being subjected to a bit of a job interview. It’s okay: your Scorpio is just trying to establish trust, which doesn’t always come easily to them.

YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT: …And just as importantly, Scorpio knows you want it too. Just because this should be an easy thing to negotiate doesn’t mean you should be “easy.” Scorpio likes to be tempted and then have to work for it just a little. You’re worth that, aren’t you? Resistance may be futile, but a bit of it can be pretty alluring.

HEY, LET’S NOT RUSH THIS: You might be in such a rush to bed your Scorpio, and (in combination with that reputation of theirs) you might forget that there’s a person attached to that birth chart. Cuddling? Niceness? Good humor? Yes, Scorpio responds to these things as much as the next guy does. And yes, sometimes during the thrill of the hunt those things can be overlooked.

And finally, if you don’t want to send that Scorpio away, here’s something to avoid: lying like a rug! Okay, sure: everyone wants people to be honest with them, and dating often involves a little… um, salesmanship. But Scorpio has a particular talent for spotting stray lies (even little ones), and there’s no faster way to send a Scorpio away than to make them think you’re trying to pull a fast one on them. Scorpio has a reputation for being “sexy,” but they’re also known for being “really defensive,” and there’s a lot of truth to both of those.

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the the NEW Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, and more material on blog entries!