Oh My Stars

Oh My Stars

Your Soulmate Situation Sucks II: Soulmates Are For Suckers!

posted by Matthew Currie

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(CLICK HERE for Part One, “The Astrology Of Why Your Soulmate Situation Sucks”)

Dear JM:

I would like to thank you for your comments on Facebook about my recent blog entry concerning soulmates. I know it may seem odd to some that I am thanking you, because you began with “This was horrible. It should read: Why does your soulmate situation suck? Because you should be working on yourself and not looking for some imaginary partner to come and liberate you from your loneliness or your fears. But I guess that wouldn’t sell astrology consultations or books.”

Oh. Ouch.

I admit, that stung. But rather than give in to the usual impulses one encounters on the Internet, I gave some thought to what you were saying and I have some degree of agreement with your comments. I think you and I have been on the Internet long enough to realize that it is a surprisingly rare thing: coming to some agreement with the person who disagrees with you or your work. So — much like the occasional success in the search for The Elusive Soulmate — I honor that.

I think you made an excellent point when you say that many of us are unwilling to work on ourselves to become better people, and somehow magically assume that finding a “soulmate” will automatically fill in all our blanks.

Let me try to define a little what I mean by “soulmate.” You will find lots of books and blogs out there that will tell you who or what this magical person is, and I can’t say I fully agree with any one of those answers that I have read, all the time. “Soulmate” is a little like “art” or “pornography”: it’s inherently hard to define, but I know it when I see it.

I think that a “soulmate” is the ideal you’re aiming for in a relationship. That’s incredibly tricky when you consider that we are talking about relationships with human beings, and not ideals. Human beings have an unfortunate tendency to look better in the picture on the packaging, but once you open up the box and get the actual product… like a child playing with a present the day after Christmas, one is can be more enamored with the box than the gift that was in it.

So yes: I believe that to a certain extent, over-hyping the whole “soulmate” concept can lead to some form of disappointment. However I would suggest this is not perhaps not an entirely bad thing. Life on earth, by its very nature, is bound to have some disappointments. But… and I will be the first to admit that I might be biased because I’m a Sagittarius and we are prone to relentless optimism at times… I see no harm in aiming for the stars and only making it to the Moon, because let’s be honest: making it to the Moon is a pretty awesome achievement.

One of the main reasons I became an astrologer is that, better than any other science or philosophy I have found, it helps to explain in real and practical ways how relationships can go right and how they can go wrong, and what to do about it. I feel that astrology, applied properly, can do at least as much good as any form of counseling I’ve seen, if not more so.

You are right when you say that astrology covers a lot of ground: financial strategy and medical astrology and astrological weather prediction all come to mind. But still, relationships are a major driver for the business. I don’t believe writing about these things as often as I do is aiming for “the lowest common denominator for my target market.” It’s just something that naturally comes up a lot in my line of work.

This brings me to another point you raised: the disparity between the numbers of men and women when it comes to people who actually follow astrology. Just like anyone else who writes for a living to promote their services, yes: when I am writing I am writing for my target market. Although the majority of that “target market” is women, I can’t honestly say that I usually have that demographic fact specifically in mind.

Why does that gender disparity exist? Beats me. I’ve asked other astrologers about this before and never got an answer I completely believe. As you point out, it does seem that culturally women are more “relationship oriented” than men appear to be. We can argue all you want about whether that is biological, cultural, or some combination of the two, or something else entirely… but that does often appear to be the case. And I do mean appear. One conclusion I’ve come to over the years is that I genuinely don’t believe that overall men are really less “relationship oriented” as they let on. They will often express it differently than women, or perhaps not express it as clearly as women do, but at the end of the day I think the impulses men and women feel are much more alike than dissimilar.

And finally: I’m well aware that many women have no interest in finding a soulmate. Many men do not either. I am pleased to be of service to those people too. Much of my work involves career counseling and financial planning and medical astrology, among other things. We are all different despite our similarities, and no two people (or birth charts) are ever exactly alike.

And although part of the reason I write is to promote my services, that isn’t my only motivator. I’ve had a lot of jobs in my time, and frankly most of them paid better than being an astrologer or a writer. If all I was interested in was making money off of readings by selling someone (largely women as you point out) some lies about love, you’d see me writing a lot more articles like “Can Astrology Make Your Thighs Thinner In 30 Days? The Answer Will Shock You!” or “Why Do Matchmakers Hate This Astrologer?” or “Is He Cheating On You? Only Matthew Currie Knows For Sure!”

Ick.

But you’ve got to admit that for at least as long as recorded history tells us, relationships have been a major concern of humans. Personally, I am encouraged by this. We could all stand to be kinder and more gentle towards each other, and the love between two people can be a beginning step towards making the entire world a better place for all of us.

McDonald’s makes a fortune selling lousy food to people, but that doesn’t mean hunger itself is an invention of modern capitalism. Likewise, the Call Of The Soulmate wasn’t invented by the Marketing-Internet Complex.

Besides: when you get right down to it, despite all the pain and suffering and stupidity and crap we humans inflict on each other in our relationships, some of us continue to follow the mysterious, compelling sound of that song…

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…and sometimes, in a few rare and special and precious cases, we find it.

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

The Astrology Of Why Your Soulmate Situation Sucks

posted by Matthew Currie

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I can’t tell you for sure whether or not it’s love that really makes the world go round, but it’s certainly a large part of an astrologer’s business. And, just as the average doctor gets to see a lot more sick people than healthy ones, over the years I have developed a real eye for what can go wrong in people’s love lives.

Most of the complaints people have about their love lives fall into one of a few distinct categories.

I don’t have one: This can be a painful situation. I believe some of us have a greater need to be loved than others, and for some even a short time without a relationship can hurt. Sometimes these dry spells can simply boil down to the transits you’re having. After all, if you are a big fan of ice fishing, it’s easy to see why you won’t get much of it in during the summer. Saturn spends an average of 2 1/2 years transiting through a house, like the Fifth House of romance or The Seventh House of committed relationships. That doesn’t necessarily imply a complete lack of romance, but it certainly makes for flinty soil to plant the seeds of love in. If you want love, you need to understand the circumstances that you’re in, and that some times are better than others. It also helps to know what when upcoming transits will improve your odds of finding what you want.

Also: understanding your own birth chart can be incredibly helpful when it comes to finding a partner. Let’s be honest here: whether we like it or not, there’s certain form of salesmanship that can be involved in finding someone and getting a relationship going. Knowing the pros and cons of the product you’re selling – yourself– is the key to sealing the deal. And of course understanding your self and your needs and what you are drawn to can also help you find something that’s right for you it works… as opposed to the usual bad choices you may find yourself making.

The one I have is starting to stink: Nobody’s perfect, and that includes your partner. We can all fall into patterns and habits around our relationships that do more harm than good. Understanding your partner’s birth chart and transits can clarify what’s going on with him or her, when things are likely to improve, and when – most importantly – what we can do to understand it and work with it better.

I want the old one back: Now we’re getting into tricky territory. The circumstances of a break up can often feel like you’ve had a limb amputated, and like people who experience Phantom Limb Syndrome, the thing that isn’t there can still cause pain. Sometimes this is a matter of looking at the partner’s chart and your own and understanding why you didn’t hold together, or what could have been done differently. However it’s worth noting that knowing “things could have been done differently” in the long run isn’t always terribly helpful. Then again, sometimes these things can be repaired, and knowing the transits can help with that.

The one I have is not the one I want: Welcome to soap opera country! This happens to people more than many would like to admit. You are in a relationship with someone and it is going okay or indifferently or badly, and then someone shows up who seems to be perfect. Before you know it, you have a degree of involvement with two different people. If you ask anyone who’s been in a situation like this, you’ll know it’s pretty rare for things to work out just fine completely on their own. Talking to an astrologer though can help you understand the pros and cons of each relationship individually, understand why things may be going unusually well or unusually poorly with this one or that one, and what the long-term forecast is likely to be with either party. And of course an astrologer can also help you understand yourself and why this whole thing happened in the first place. This can help you come to a clear-headed decision.

My love is not being returned properly: It could be just a phase, or rather a transit. Or it could be that the relationship was wired for a limited lifespan in the first place. Or you could be fundamentally misreading the situation. In either case, understanding how old your birth charts interact and how the transits are affecting your behaviors can be incredibly helpful.

I don’t want one: That’s okay. We can talk about lots of other stuff too.

 (Part Two is HERE.)

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

Learn Astrology: A Goddess Of Love Walks Into A Bar…

posted by Matthew Currie

(Scene: a poorly lit Mexican bar. A telenovela plays on the television screen but no one is watching, which is just as well because it is inaudible over the accordion and tuba music playing out of the speakers on the ceiling. The only customers are the SUN, MOON, and MERCURY, who sit at a relatively clean table in a darkened corner.)

MERCURY: … And so anyway, that’s how the neurology of an octopus works. Essentially they have six arms and two legs, not “eight legs.”

SUN: (not hiding his boredom) Yeah, that’s great. Anyway, is anything interesting ever going to happen here?

MOON: I’m starting to worry it won’t.

MERCURY: You never really stop worrying for long, do you? Hey, did I ever tell you guys the one about the priest, the rabbi, and the android who –

SUN and MOON: YES.

(The door to the bar opens and in walks VENUS, her pretty summer dress waving slightly in a breeze that wasn’t there before she arrived. Her manicure is impeccable, her hair is like something out of a shampoo commercial, and even though she walks at a normal pace something about her appears to be moving in slow motion. For no obvious reason, the pre-recorded Mexican oompah music stops and “Dreamweaver” begins to play. Venus sits at a table near the SUN, MOON, and MERCURY. Through some strange trick of the light, her table is now the most brightly lit place in the bar.)

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SUN: Whoa. I have this sudden feeling that my magnificence would be even greater if someone else was appreciating it.

MOON: I’m getting a great deal of both comfort and excitement out of this.

MERCURY: At last! Maybe someone who will laugh at my jokes!

(The three gesture frantically at the waitress, who comes to their table. All three of them babble orders simultaneously, and somehow the waitress is able to make sense of it. She leaves, and the SUN, MOON, and MERCURY continue to stare at the table where VENUS is sitting. She smiles at them, and once more the room inexplicably brightens.)

SUN: I feel like we were strangely incomplete before this turn of events.

MOON: I’m enjoying the warmth of potentially forming social connections.

MERCURY: I think I could learn a lot from this.

(The waitress arrives at VENUS‘ table and delivers a beer, a fruity drink with an umbrella in it, a shot glass of whiskey, a dozen roses, a box of candy, a burrito, a gold bracelet, an autographed copy of “Jonathan Livingston Seagull,” and a banjo. VENUS receives these gifts graciously and mouths the words “thank you” to the three at the other table.)

SUN: I think that I…

MOON: …Just fell in…

MERCURY: Now, let’s stop and think about this for a second guys. Sure, when she showed up we suddenly discovered some form of pleasure and delight that we hadn’t known before. And admittedly her presence here does give the place a glow and warmth that it didn’t have before. And yes, all of a sudden we have this urge to be sweet and to experience sweetness and to take enjoyment from the physical world, but that doesn’t mean –

(VENUS stands up and approaches the table. SUN, MOON and MERCURY scramble to straighten their hair, scrape the food stains off their shirts, check their breath and hitch up their pants.)

VENUS: Hi guys. Mind if I join you…?

(SUN MOON and MERCURY scramble to get a chair, knock over their table, fall over themselves, and end up in a pile on the floor fighting over the nearest chair. In short order they manage to sort this out, produce a chair, turn the table upright, and retrieve the pile of gifts from the other table. VENUS sits down gracefully.)

VENUS: Wow. I sure appreciate your enthusiasm.

(SUN, MOON and MERCURY lean over the table and stare rapturously at VENUS, who looks over her recently-acquired pile of gifts)

VENUS: So… um… nice banjo…?

 

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

Weekly Horoscope (For The Right People Only), August 25-31, 2014

posted by Matthew Currie

This week’s horoscope is going to be just a little bit different from the usual. Normally I would be breaking down the effects of the upcoming week’s transits for everyone, and sorting them by Sun Sign. This week’s horoscope is only directed at the Right People. If you are not one of these, feel free to move along. Next week’s horoscope will be more for you.

How do you if you’re one of the Right People? You can tell because of that sound that’s been building in the background for the last couple of months. You know the one: the low groaning that sounds like old timbers being stressed in a windstorm. It’s the sound of what the Saturn-Uranus quincunx has been doing to you, and it’s gotten louder in the last week or so because Mars has joined it.

That particular transit hits its peak on Monday, which is also the day of the New Moon. We are starting a new cycle, and this one is being born with a little more mess and screaming than the average birth. You might at times find yourself wondering if this crap will ever end, or if something even worse is about to come into being.

This is how you know that you are one of the Right People: you are being forged into something better than you were. I know that’s often very painful and awkward and lonely, but I think you’re going to turn out all right, and I have three reasons to believe that.

First of all, on this New Moon, Mercury is sextile Mars and Saturn. This means that if something blows up in your life, you will have the brains and common sense as to what to do about it. And hopefully, if you need to be the one who blows something up, you will be able to do it wisely and efficiently.

Secondly, Venus is trine Uranus. Mars conjunct Saturn may sound like a gathering of fierce darkness, but when Venus and Uranus work together, acts of loving genius are possible. Whether this love is something you need to show to someone else or yourself is your decision.

But finally: the only reason the Universe is giving you the gift of strife or anguish or pressure or tension or craziness that it is right now is because, after all, you are one of The Right People. That has to be a tremendous comfort, doesn’t it?

“When the darkness comes, know this: you are the right people, in the right place, at the right time.”

-Babylon 5

Questions about your birth chart, or astrology in general? Want to know more about my big discount on readings for new clients? Want a free month of my NEW Subscription Service? Write me for details!

CLICK HERE to join the Oh My Stars Facebook Fan Page, and get exclusive content, an additional discount on a reading, more material on blog entries, AND ANOTHER free e-book!

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