Sassy Spirit

Sassy Spirit

Merry Let it Go Christmas

posted by jperry

I didn’t do Christmas cards. I skipped last year too.  Last year, in my defense, I gave birth the day after Christmas.  This year, I could play the I have five kids or the baby card still.  I did bake both years and still have to bake more cookies, but I spread them out on different days. We are making the Gingerbread houses from a box as usual. Our Elf on the Shelf hasn’t been as adventurous this year. Gift cards and money have become my MO for many gifts. I don’t like stress. It’s not part of the holidays unless we keep perpetuating it. I choose to change course if I do go there in my mind.

If you have a busy work schedule, lots of kids, travel often, or just have a lot on your plate…the holidays can look like a “to-do list” and not anything FUN!  The mood in the world can be tense as well.  The holidays bring up a lot of issues.  If you’re unhappily single, visiting family, wanting to lose weight, feeling like you’re wallet is stretched, and that what did I accomplish in the past year vibe, holidays can feel like a battlefield as well.  All our inadequacies can be like a flashing light in our life and those damn Christmas commercials with the happy perfect families can make us feel bad on top of our own stress.  The pressure is there.

Some years I had to have perfect presents for people too…like it actually meant my value.  Now I just do the best.  They say you pick your battles and I think it’s all about focus as well.  Pick your point of focus.  Having an impeccable looking house or looking cute, I choose the cute route.  My kids mess up the house on a regular basis anyway.  I can really only control so much without being even more of a crazy drill sergeant I can already be sometimes.  Life is too short for extra stress.  I’m thinking this Let it Go Christmas will lead to a great new year.  2014 was great and this one will be even better  I’ll let go of what doesn’t work best for me.

Speaking of “Let it Go” which was a huge hit song from the adorable movie Frozen which I loved.  I even got a light aqua velvet dress and it’s such an Elsa dress because of that color.  It reminds me of mermaids too.  I’m thinking it will be a lucky dress for my book release party for Sexpot With Stretch Marks, my first non-fiction book.  It’s not a formal party.  I just want to celebrate.  Since it’s right after the holidays, I want it to be fun and easy.  Fancy and simple like me, so a local pub that serves yummy cheese fries is perfect.  I’m so excited to go out and talk about this book.  I love inspiring, inspiring, and empowering others.

As we head down the holiday home stretch, let’s enjoy ourselves and watch the festive movies, listen to the jolly music, and look at the cheerful decorations and savor the season.  Invent new traditions.  Let go of old traditions that just stress you out.  Kids love happy parents not the idea we have of how it should look.  Messy is normal.  And love is messy too.  Lots of love and cookies to you for this stress-free holiday season.    Merry Let it Go Christmas and Happy Let it Go New Years.

Secret Scrooge

posted by jperry

There were years where I was so stressed about Christmas in my twenties that I couldn’t enjoy the season. All I felt was that pressure to buy the right presents, do all the Christmas stuff for the kids, and hope I could pull it off. Buying photo Christmas cards of the kids were worrisome from getting a great picture to how much the cards cost and then the stamps on top of it.  Add cookie ingredients and buying containers for them. I could never think of cheap and clever gifts. Pinterest wasn’t around back then. I had to space out my buying of all that with other people’s presents. Then scramble as we ran to the toy store in hopes they had what was on the kids’ lists. I was a secret Scrooge.

We looked all fancy for Christmas Eve Mass and always managed to pull it off and even though my gray hairs multiplied, my kids always had a great Christmas. I also would get annoyed if they added to their list at the last minute or how the day after Christmas, they were always crabby. I think everyone experiences that letdown, but last year welcomed our fifth child that day so it became a magical day.

I had already changed the whole tone of Christmas as I changed my mindset in life. I stopped focusing on the problem. I stopped worrying if my husband and I could get each other gifts and the fact that some people celebrated in a more posh or epic way. I made it fun. I made it all about the Spirit of Christmas. Regardless of your religion, it’s about family, goodwill towards others, and our blessings. It is a holy time and it feels like it.

This year I’m also lining up interviews as I get ready to release my first non-fiction book, Sexpot With Stretch Marks, on January 8th, four days after we celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary and my Mom turns 70 on December 30th.   I’m so blessed.  2015 feels like it will be amazing.  Once I could afford the stuff, I had already realized it wasn’t about the stuff.

We are going to start our cookie baking this weekend and I vow like every year not to go overboard.   We’ll make our gingerbread houses. We will watch ELF and National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation like we do every year.  We’ll marvel at the lights and try to find the over-the-top decorations.  We stretch it out.  We are so glad to have Elf on the Shelf here most days as we get to experience the fun through the kids’ eyes.  They light up as they find Ernie our elf.  We also got ugly Christmas sweaters for the kids and my hubby, with me wearing a gaudy sparkly Christmas dress.  It is really about enjoying every holiday to the fullest with what you have.  Maybe one year when the kids are older, we’ll do a tropical vacay for the holidays.  Who knows?  I’m so happy we took them to the Radio City Music Hall Christmas Show.  Even if it’s a free play you can go to, doing those things teach kids to find happiness in the Spirit of Christmas.  I love nowadays I can get caught up in it and I can shop online at the same time.  I’m like the Holiday happy girl now.  I even made Christmas raps the last two years.  Wonder if I should make one this year?  Stay tuned…

Blessings to all this holiday season whatever you celebrate.

Enjoy life today

posted by jperry

What if today you decided to really enjoy yourself? Is that a weird concept to you? If you feel every day is a struggle, why not look at it like this…that idea of “I can finally enjoy myself when…A. I lose this weight. B. My business is where I want it to be. C. I’m out of debt. D. My kids are grown up.” Or insert any reason you feel is a reason for struggle. What if that was just a story you’re telling and think you have to stick to? What if you could change the story? 

The paragraph above was my post on Facebook this morning that lead to me checking my notifications and see some sponsored ads for marketing, business, and branding….and got me thinking…what do I know?  Which led to this…

Raising my hand here in the classroom and saying what many are thinking…”Marketing is overwhelming. There is so much information it can feel like you’re on the treadmill too fast and info is flying on past. You think you know stuff and then you read something on a blog or a sponsored ad on Facebook and ya kinda just want to get up and walk out of the classroom.”

This does not mean bombard me with your services. This does not mean I don’t want to learn. This just means I forget to have fun sometimes. Life is too short to hurt my brain with business and hit my head against a brick wall. I won’t market or do anything like anyone else but me. I do need help and I’m getting clearer on that, but I choose who it will be. They must “get” me and believe in my mission, skills, and awesomeness and vice versa. And that in the age of social media, I value authenticity versus just smoke-and mirrors, 24/7.

I am a very positive person, but I like to keep it real.  I need to remind myself of my own advice at times, which is what every coach should remember as well. No matter what you are working on, whether weight loss, business, relationships, self-growth, etc. take a deep breath.  You’re doing fine.  My post from yesterday which I needed today.  Perfect timing.

Be laser focused on your goals, building your business and brand, increasing customers/clients, and increasing your prosperity. But really be precision-ninja-attention aimed at joy. Follow that. Not just quick happy, but lighter and deeper. Joy activates your brilliance and sends a Bat signal to the Universe…”Gimme some more, Dude. I love you. Thanks!” Joy attracts people like a sacred magnet. Souls know energy and want to feel good.

So today, do just that.  Joy is a YES!  Go with your gut.  Your feelings are your guide.  Trust that.  Beyond the noise of the world, look for what the Universe and your soul is trying to tell you. Feelings and emotions are a compass.  They are not a steadfast truth, but an evolving one. You can tap into that knowing when you forget what everyone else is saying for a while. Namaste & blessings. 

 

Who has your key?

posted by jperry

As time goes on, I realize there is really only one key to happiness, but it changes shape.

The key is yours to hold forever.  It takes a certain amount of wisdom to know this.  Some never get this.  I’m trying to teach my seven year old this concept.  He’s the middle child of five and often plays victim and feels sorry for himself.  I know how to play that well myself.  That’s why it’s even more annoying.  I used to live every day with the perspective that happiness was something outside of me.

I’m teaching my son, Finnegan, that your happiness is this box in your hands and you hold the key.  Some people give their box to someone else and they still hold the key.  But some people are constantly giving their box and new keys out daily to different people.  I always have my box, but sometimes I give my keys out to my kids.  When they are all fighting, it’s easy to succumb to the trap.  I also use to give the box/key to weight loss, my bank account, and whether people liked me.

The only thing being liked ever guarantees you is a momentary sense of satisfaction that is replaced immediately with a “what’s next?”

Happiness also seems like something we must chase down and isn’t right there in existence all along.  It resides within like the pearl in the oyster shell at times.  Other times it shines so bright, people are actually glowing.  I think peace was a key to happiness too, but it can be fleeting as disturbances in a pool of water are natural to occur.  It’s the same with happiness too.  Peace and happiness are states of being we are in and then out.  Nothing has gone wrong, we reach higher levels of happiness and deeper levels of peace.  The doorway to the box is always within.  Self-love is the abra-cada-bra!  Love yourself to happiness, not the other way around.

The key to happiness in life is to know your value. You are the real key.  That never changes, your value that is. People will tell you when you’re young, you haven’t earned it. When you’re old, they’ll tell you it expired. It’s all a big-old-moldy-mean lie. “They” are giving you a gift that you get to unwrap. Without the bow and fancy wrapping, there is you. Your genius, brilliance, and truth, you will discover these when you don’t look into others’ eyes to see it. You’ll forget this. You’ll remember. A cycle of a love affair you were meant to have with yourself. All the good love stories have some turmoil and then they get back together. Their hearts were always together though. That’s you and your soul. True love forever. No one can ever cause a breakup, they just help shed some light in how much you value the connection when it’s not there.

Tune into what makes you feel happy.  Decide to be happy.  Feel happiness.  It’s a channel you can always keep turning your dial to get to.  It can always be adjusted.  You are the key to your happiness.

Previous Posts

Merry Let it Go Christmas
I didn't do Christmas cards. I skipped last year too.  Last year, in my defense, I gave birth the day after Christmas.  This year, I could play the I have five kids or the baby card still.  I did bake both years and still have to bake more cookies, but I spread them out on different days. We

posted 1:52:04am Dec. 21, 2014 | read full post »

Secret Scrooge
There were years where I was so stressed about Christmas in my twenties that I couldn't enjoy the season. All I felt was that pressure to buy the right presents, do all the Christmas stuff for the kids, and hope I could pull it off. Buying photo Christmas cards of the kids were worrisome from gett

posted 9:20:17pm Dec. 12, 2014 | read full post »

Enjoy life today
What if today you decided to really enjoy yourself? Is that a weird concept to you? If you feel every day is a struggle, why not look at it like this...that idea of "I can finally enjoy myself when...A. I lose this weight. B. My business is where I want it to be. C. I'm out of debt. D. My kids are g

posted 7:11:02pm Dec. 09, 2014 | read full post »

Who has your key?
As time goes on, I realize there is really only one key to happiness, but it changes shape. The key is yours to hold forever.  It takes a certain amount of wisdom to know this.  Some never get this.  I'm trying to teach my seven year old this concept.  He's the middle child of five and often

posted 12:59:28am Dec. 08, 2014 | read full post »

Let there be peace
Yesterday my Mom and Dad took my kids, hubby, and I, along with my daughter's boyfriend, my sister and her husband, up to New York City to see the Christmas Show at Radio City Music Hall. Kids loved the LEGOS store and the girls loved Sephora. I even got a Vegan dinner at John's on 12th St. in East

posted 9:19:58pm Dec. 05, 2014 | read full post »


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