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“Don’t allow your wounds to transform you into someone you are not.” Paulo Coelho “Only by acceptance of the past will you alter its meaning.” T.S. Eliot “Travel far enough, you meet yourself.” David Mitchell “Divorce isn’t such a tragedy. A tragedy’s staying in an unhappy marriage, teaching your children the wrong things about love.…

I roll one of my kitchen cabinet drawers open. It’s a side cabinet that I barely use since it’s awkward. I see shards of glass and open it even further to inspect. A simple, glass, Lenox bowl that we received as a wedding present is broken in half. I am once again fighting tears. All…

I find a lot of doors closing for me. The truth is they have been closing for me for quite some time only I wouldn’t let them. I have done everything to stop it. I have put my foot in the door. I shove back. I bang on them. It’s hopeless. I need to finally…

I am the youngest of five children. I remember in grade school the days they would tell us to bring in a baby picture. We used to joke with our mom that she would just hand us any picture and tell us that she thought it was us. Now of course, I am exaggerating (slightly)…

“Why did you do it?” I am asked that question frequently. You may be surprised at the remarks that fly my way… “Lots of couples are unhappy,” “It’s better for the kids to stay married,” “Who do you know that truly has a happy marriage?” “Stay together for the kids and just live your own…

I am continually reminded that divorce is a grieving process. It the midst of living through it you recognize all of the stages of grief. The kids of divorce feel these stages as well. It’s important to recognize this. We all grieve differently and we can’t always lean on each other. This life change can…

It has been said that divorce is like grief. I would agree. It is a loss and loss is felt especially during the holidays. I know that as I move forward that my boys are still acclimating to the changes in their home. A little over a week ago, my family came to my house…

We are laughing with my sister who recently had knee surgery. It is my sister, my niece and me. “I’m weepy,” she says. “Weepy, who says that?” laughs her daughter. I know who says that! It was our mother. I miss my mom. I really miss my mom through the ‘weepier’ days of divorce. And…

I am a hypocrite of my own words. I often say that writers tell what others are at times afraid to speak of. This week I found out that even I have fear. That even I can’t bring myself to speak of certain things which are scarier to me than the emotional cost of divorce.…

I am sitting to write my column. It is a weepy day. A day when the side effects of divorce are difficult to stave off. I am worried about my children, about paying the bills, about a true independent future. I take a moment to click on the Beliefnet article below. I find it difficult…
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