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Good Days…Bad Days With Maureen Pratt

Good Days…Bad Days With Maureen Pratt

Chronic Illness and Pain: Sisters, Please Read This!

posted by mpratt

Maureen Pratt Author Picf you have just been diagnosed with a serious chronic illness, or if you have been living with one for a long time, I just want to take time out to just say something, sister-to-sister:  Please do not be angry with yourself if you find that you simply cannot do it all, like you think you used to be able to do! Instead, take good care – of yourself and your loved ones. Be kind to yourself, and let your Spirit catch those tears and transform them into comfort and calm as you rest more each day in God’s love and support.

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Why do I write this?

Because I often heard, before and after lupus, that “women should be able to do it all,” or “as a woman, there’s no reason why you can’t have it all.” Usually, the “all” referred to having a career, satisfying relationships, children, a home, and probably even a small business venture on the side. But in life, rarely is it possible to “have it all” or “do it all” to the satisfaction of everyone and each endeavor. And, when you have a chronic illness, well, all “alls” are often even farther out of reach.

Having an illness brings more stress to a life that’s probably already laden with it. And having an illness brings to our bodies and hearts a vulnerability that is extermely sensitive to the onslaught of doctors, meds, tests, flares, and changes in appearance and abilities. Instead of striving (and straining) for “doing/having it all,” we often have trouble just getting the basics done without feeling fatigued or, at the extreme end of it, wiped out. I have witnessed many woman become even more ill when they try to merely add a chronic illness on top of the myriad other responsibilities that they already have. And I’ve witnessed this, and the frustration and disappointment, in my own life, too.

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Yes, we fight against the illnesses that constrain us. Yes, we have deep dreams and things we would like to accomplish. But within these emotions, goals, dreams and realities, we have precious lives, we love precious people, and we serve a wonderful God!

Sister, we do not have to “do it all,” as our society would so frequently encourage or dictate. But that which we do, with our God-given treasure of talents, energy,  and love, that, yes, that, will be enough.

Joy and peace,

Maureen

 

 

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Chronic Illness: Do You Wonder? And, Why It Matters

posted by mpratt

The clouds in the sky. A flash of lightning. A baby’s giggle. A “common” cold.

When you see or hear these things, do you disect them scientifically? Or, do you wonder?

What are the things in your life that you try to analyze?

What are the things that you lift up to God, pondering whether or what the meaning of it all might be?

Although we life in a time and with health conditions that can often be at least partically explained in terms of genes and cells and chemical reactions, there is still much in life that cannot be scientifically explained. Lupus, for example, still defies exact description, although some might say, erroneously, that they have it all figured out!

With much still unexplained, instead of fretting over, “When will they know?” or “Will I live long enough to see a cure?” I prefer to go to the Source of it all. I prefer to lift my wondering eyes up to God. In doing so, I find any stress over “no cure yet” evaporates, and in its place is the knowledge and comfort that, no matter what might be in the future, I, body and soul, will be all right because I’m in God’s hands.

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I also lift the same kind of wonder and appreciation up when I see that jagged flash of light, or take time to feel the breeze on my face. I don’t have to know the currents and the chemicals, the reactions and the equations. I merely appreciate the nature around me – and that is enough. And, I try, too, not to insist on “figuring out” my friends and family, but just rest in their presence and enjoy and love them for who they are.

If we insist on scientifically disecting everything in our world and lives, we run the risk of missing the point of them, the majesty, the beauty, and our own place, which is to appreciate, give thanks, and care about and for the unfolding wonders.

Yes, it matters if we wonder! If we don’t, we’re truly missing out!

Peace,

Maureen

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Chronic Pain: Feeling the Heat?

posted by mpratt
Image Courtesy of Simon Howden/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image Courtesy of Simon Howden/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Searing. Exhausting. Oppressive.

These and other words are often used to describe the high heat of the summertime. And they’re also words that we use to describe pain, especially the kind of pain that is chronic and unrelenting.

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This summer has been a very tough one for high temperatures and chronic pain, and one of the things that I’ve been trying to do to “cool off” is return a bit to my childhood, especially the fond memories I have of escaping the heat (we didn’t have air conditioning when I was growing up) by cocooning in the local library and devouring book after book. How I loved going to all those interesting places, meeting amazing characters, and diving into stories woven in different times!  No “hard-hitting” novels, then, but rather “juvenile” fiction – the Narnia Chronicles by C.S. Lewis, the Wizard of Oz books, Misty of Chincoteague and the other “horsey” novels. I just last week finished reading my first “Freddy the Pig” book by Walter R. Brooks, and am now moving on to my second. What fun! And what a fun way to cool off!

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These escapes are not just in the realm of youth. We adults can also cocoon in cooler climes with our favorite characters from childrens’ and young adult literature – and discover more that have been written since. We can lose ourselves in those intriguing stories, creative scenarios, and characters that seem to become friends and who beckon, “Leave your pain, the heat of suffering. Come. Linger. Read. Enjoy!”

The heat will continue to bear down, and time passes anyway. Why not spend it with an old, cool friend?

Joy,
Maureen

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Chronic Illness: The Choices We Make

posted by mpratt
Image courtesy of Aduldej/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Image courtesy of Aduldej/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

It might not seem as if we have many choices when our priority is to stave off flares, infections, and other consequences of living with a chronic illness. But there are some things over which we have control, and one of the “big” ones is how we approach each day.

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I recently wrote about clothes shopping, and wnat to continue with this analogy here. I honestly can say that I’ve never shopped for clothing that will make me look terrible. On purpose, of course. Sometimes, what seems to look good in the store doesn’t translate to everyday life. But what I’m talking about here is purposefully choosing clothing that is utterly unattractive. I, and most people, I think, just don’t do it.

Why is this?

Most of us do want to look decent, at least, and good, at best. Yes, even if we have an illness that renders us unrecognizable to ourselves adn long-time family and friends!

So, why then would any one of us choose to approach our precious days with an ugly or even pessimistic attitude?

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The obvious answer to this is, well, some days are difficult, if not horrible. Filled with pain, setbacks, flares, and disappointments. But while this is true, this doesn’t mean we have to internally be drawn down completely by these negatives. Although we might feel frustration, anger, and other “uglier” emotions, we can also think  our way past them somewhat by deciding to be more positive. To find the silver lining. To recognize the blessing that God is giving, even in the midst of our suffering.

As with clothes shopping, each of us has a specific budget we have to work within (energy, physical resources, time in the cycle of our illness and pain). We also have finite parameters (our size, height, age, etc.). And we might even have so much pain that we have limited desire to pull ourselves out from under our burden.

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But it’s important to remember that, while we have limitations, God does not. He’s actually with us as we “shop” each day, making choices that will either enhance or continue to weigh down our mood and either bolster or burden our spirit. He’s that voice that tells us “that smile looks great on you,” and “here, here is something to help you laugh/look upon the world with wonder/reach out to someone with my love.”

Think of it – God is our personal shopper! And, with him in our corner, we’ll undoubtedly look our best, no matter what our budget!

Joy,

Maureen

Previous Posts

Chronic Illness and Pain: Sisters, Please Read This!
f you have just been diagnosed with a serious chronic illness, or if you have been living with one for a long time, I just want to take time out to just say something, sister-to-sister:  Please do not be angry with yourself if you find that you ...

posted 8:32:25pm Aug. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Chronic Illness: Do You Wonder? And, Why It Matters
The clouds in the sky. A flash of lightning. A baby's giggle. A "common" cold. When you see or hear these things, do you disect them scientifically? Or, do you wonder? What are the things in your life that you try to analyze? What are ...

posted 7:23:11pm Aug. 25, 2015 | read full post »

Chronic Pain: Feeling the Heat?
Searing. Exhausting. Oppressive. These and other words are often used to describe the high heat of the summertime. ...

posted 7:06:47pm Aug. 24, 2015 | read full post »

Chronic Illness: The Choices We Make
It might not seem as if we have many choices when our priority is to stave off flares, infections, and other consequences of ...

posted 6:51:15pm Aug. 22, 2015 | read full post »

Chronic Pain: While We Are Sleeping
When our pain is severe, it can be difficult to sleep. Even if we're able to doze, we often awaken with pain, and ...

posted 6:38:56pm Aug. 20, 2015 | read full post »

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