Admit it: at some point in your life… you’ve been jealous. I know, it’s exciting: strutting your shit, soothingly telling your new lover, “I don’t get jealous.” But you’re lying and you know it. Every cell in your body makes you want to be the one and only; it doesn’t matter if your social status says otherwise. A recent study by Love Calculator showed no difference in amounts of jealousy between men and women. Although women get a bad reputation for being jealous, turns out men are just as bad.

The Levels of Jealousy

Knowing that everyone around you has tasted the bitter taste of jealousy doesn’t necessarily justify your behavior. So what’s considered acceptable and more of ‘the norm’? What exactly should direct you to the nearest psychiatrist? Let’s explore.

Level 1: It’s kind of cute

This is the most common. It feels like a little tickle of envy, though you don’t necessarily feel threatened.. And even so, you’re quick to realize it’s just the green eyed monster talking. The outsider may be better looking or may be someone who is constantly around your lover – i.e. a coworker.

The suspicion is easily treated with a short, reassuring conversation with your love. Usually done in a playful manner, your lover will sense your level of uneasiness and rescue you with a few reassuring words.

Level 2: Moderate

Also common is the level of moderate jealousy. This usually arises when dealing with your lovers exes or any one else with a history dating back longer than yours. In such cases, though normal, it needs to be addressed as quickly as possible. Letting this jealousy wild will lead you into dangerous grounds; there is no telling what your mind is capable of making you believe.

Sit down and talk to your partner, as long as you need to. Get everything out and communicate even the wildest fears. If you don’t, you’ll walk away thinking you’ve been cured and wake up convinced the two of them are planning on eloping.

Level 3: Psycho

Rare, but let’s face it: we’ve all had at least ONE psycho lover.. what makes you think you weren’t that ONE to someone else? At this stage, you’re letting all of your fears take a hold of you; you’ve developed a hatred for someone you may not even know and are convinced that there’s an ongoing plot to fuck you over, leaving you to be the doofus.

You may even be aware that your behavior is borderline psychotic, but you can’t stop. You know the signs: snooping, threatening, clinging, contacting the outside parties…

At this stage, you should end it. I know, this isn’t what your psychoness needs to hear right now.. But unless you’ve got a legitimate reason to be worried, the fears are stemming from YOUR OWN insecurities. I’ll be writing an article on the topic in greater detail.. But know that you keying the outsider’s car is not justified behavior.

In most cases, your lover is with you because he/she WANTS to be. In most cases, you don’t have to worry about someone being fitter or more attractive than you because if that’s what appealed to your lover, they’d be off shagging them and not you.

Being addicted to the green eyed monster lowers your attractiveness level by  one too many notches. In some cases, you could literally repel your lover into believing there was cause for suspicion. Well now that I really think about it, I DO like the company.. THIS MIGHT BE SOMETHING MORE THAN JUST A FRIENDSHIP!

If you spend your relationship worrying about the end, it’ll be over before it begins. You’ll be too busy over analyzing the smallest of details to realize your relationship is slipping through your fingers.

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