Depression Help

stress | Terezia Farkas | Beliefnet | depression help


What is stress?

Stress is your body’s response to an action that you want to get away from. That action can be caused by someone or something. For example, a bully or abusive person causes you stress. Your physical environment can be stressful if it’s a noisy workplace or full of smokers. Environment can even be stressful and dangerous, like in the case of the California fires. Sometimes, you can flee the situation or the problem. But sometimes you can’t. That’s when stress turns to burnout to depression.

How to release stress.

Identify the actual problem.

Is it really your coworker who is stressing you out, or is it your boss who refuses to put you in a different shift so you can avoid your coworker? Is the problem really work, or is it something deeper like a family matter? Once you identify what the real problem is, what’s causing you the most stress, then you can come up with an action plan.

Create an action plan.

Creating an action plan doesn’t need to be complicated. It can be as simple as talking to someone about the problem. Sometimes talk is enough to resolve the situation.

But if the stress is more layered, or you can’t really get away from the stress, or there’s no way to create change in a person or environment, then you need to take a more measured approach.

Find allies.

There are allies, or people, who can support you or give advice on how to manage or escape the stress. The best ones to contact are professional mental health workers. These people are skilled and trained in dealing with stress and burnout. Other allies can be co-workers, family members, neighbours, and friends. Seek out your allies.

Learn to say NO.

It’s not unusual to say NO. It’s not bad either to say NO. Saying no puts you back in control of yourself and the moment. It’s a skill that takes practice. You also need to know who you can say no to, because sometimes negative people won’t take no for an answer.

Talk about your problems.

Loved ones might not know or realize you’re stressed out. Everyone has issues, and your stress might not register on anyone’s radar. Find someone you can trust. Trust means the person is willing to listen to your whole story without cutting you off or making judgments.

Listen to advice.

It’s important to listen to good advice. Just because you don’t like hearing it, doesn’t mean the advice isn’t sound or the best way forward. If you’re unsure or don’t trust a person, get a second opinion. But don’t hunt around for opinions to match your own ideas. That’s just parroting yourself.

No one can eliminate stress from their life, or prevent stress from happening. Stress is part of the natural world, and part of our human interactions. The goal of learning to manage stress is to help you bounce back from problems and keep your wellness intact.

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farmer burnout | Terezia Farkas | depression help | Beliefnet

Farmers Bob and Barb get up early every morning. They work all day in the field, come home late, and sometimes have to go back into the field after dinner. Their bodies have severe pain, they both have sleep problems, and they’re irritable with everyone. But is it stress or burnout?

Men are different from women when it comes to handling stress and burnout. But when it comes to farmers, male stress and burnout which leads to depression and maybe even suicide, is at an all time high.

Farmers deflect stress.

When it comes to personal mental health, a farmer deflects his/her mental health on other reasons. “I’m stressed cause it’s calving season,” or “this year’s harvest is gonna be ruined unless I get all the crops out today.”

Farming is a very high stress job. There are so many things that could and often do go wrong. The weather isn’t in your control. Crop prices depend on politicians and trade agreements. If there’s a trade dispute, like the one between Canada and the U.S., crop subsidies are needed to pull farmers out of financial debt. There’s issues like pay for farm workers, providing accident coverage for employees, mechanical upkeep costs, and general feed and fertilizer costs. A farmer has all these things and more to deal with.

But at what point does stress become burnout? When does going back into the field every night to finish harvesting start physically hurting? How do you even know if you’re burned out?


Burnout is when your body has had it physically and mentally. Its hit the proverbial wall. Stress has become unhealthy. It’s ruining your body, and it’s taking a toll on your ability to think. Your brain is overloaded and wants to shut out anxieties that are causing all sorts of chemical chaos in the body. Sometimes burnout shows itself slowly. Other times it’s a dramatic shutdown.

Warning Signs of Burnout.

If your ability to function is impaired, or your relationships are getting testy or unhealthy, its time to check your stress and burnout levels. Men are particularly bad when it comes to admitting burnout. Men have this belief that they have to be strong and in control of their emotions. When a man feels hopeless, helpless, or overwhelmed by despair, he tends to deny it or cover it up by drinking too much, behaving recklessly, or exploding with anger. A man is more likely to deny his feelings, to hide them from others, or mask depression with other behaviour (gambling, sex, food, anger).

Signs of burnout include:

Low energy and motivation.

Severe irritability and losing your temper easily. Feeling restless and agitated.

Severe physical pains, usually back pains and headaches.

Sexual problems.

Difficulty sleeping.

Turning to alcohol, gambling, food, sex, anger as ways to vent anxiety and frustration.

Change in attitude like cynicism, detachment, feelings of being ineffective.

How to Fight Burnout

Be aware that you’re stressed out. The first step is always knowing and admitting that you’re stretched too thin.

Talk to someone. Tell your partner or doctor or a friend about how you’re feeling. Be honest. Don’t be ashamed or afraid.

Ask for help. Ask a friend or family member to help with the chores or finances. Reach out to the farming community if any farmers can help you.

Change up the workload. Reduce how much you’re doing by sharing your workload with someone.

Take some time out. This is the hardest thing for a farmer to do. But taking time off work helps a person get a fresh perspective on life.

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Heart of Love Evolution - Surviving Depression | Terezia Farkas | depression help


lavender flowers field

There are many herbs, flowers, essential oils, and foods to deal with depression. Over the past few years, I’ve written several articles on these different alternative therapies. So here’s a quick recap of some of these natural remedies.

Arctic Root

Arctic root boosts your overall physical activity and mental vitality. Arctic root increases the feel good hormones in your brain. This makes you resilient to physical and emotional stress. Some claim arctic root works faster and better than antidepressants.

Ginkgo bilboa 

Gingko bilboa improves memory, but is even better at treating depression. Ginkgo increases the flow of dopamine and serotonin to the brain. It also increases blood flow to the brain. This helps a depressed person be able to concentrate on things a bit better.

Whole grains

Whole grains reduce mood swings, depression, and anxiety. They contain high levels of tryptophan, an amino acid necessary in the making of serotonin and melatonin. Serotonin lifts mood. Melatonin helps with the sleep cycle. Getting a good night sleep is one of the things lacking in depression and anxiety.

Pumpkin Seeds

Pumpkin seeds also contain tryptophan. So pumpkin seeds help mood and sleep cycles. Pumpkin seeds are a high source of magnesium. Magnesium lowers anxiety by relaxing nerves and muscles. Pumpkin seeds also contain zinc to boost your immune system and help you get a good night sleep.


Quinoa is a super charged package of good things for depression and anxiety. Quinoa is loaded with protein, magnesium, B vitamins, zinc, iron, phosphorus. It boosts serotonin and fights depression, fatigue and anemia. Quinoa is gluten-free, making it a food anyone could eat.


Mustard is good for severe depression, and melancholy. You can eat mustard in any form – seed or spread – and the benefits are the same.


Botanically speaking, lavender is a flowering shrub and a herb. Lavender is used in cooking, oil, and aromatherapy. Lavender is one of those flowers that you can eat and use on your skin. Lavender is used for healing because it has no real side effects. It’s safe to use for humans and animals. Lavender is non-addictive, even though it acts much like benzodiazepines, which are addictive.

Passion flower

Passion flower is a herb that treats anxiety, depression, and insomnia. It’s a natural, non-addictive sedative. Passion flower is used to treat anxiety and GAD (generalized anxiety disorder). In the United States and Europe, passion flower is used as a calming herb for anxiety, insomnia, seizures, and hysteria.


Ashwagandha, or Indian Ginseng, is known for its ability to reduce the cortisol levels which go up during stress and anxiety. The herb prevents stress related gastric ulcers, and weight gain of the adrenal glands from chronic stress. Ashwagandha relieves insomnia that comes with depression. Ashwagandha also lower blood sugar levels, body fat, and blood pressure. Ashwaganda can decrease the effectiveness of some sedative medications like Xanax, Dalmane, Ativan, and Valium.


Chamomile acts as a mild sedative. It has an antioxidant called apigenin, which binds to receptors in your brain to start the sleep cycle. Chamomile increases glucose levels, helping to relax the nerves and muscles of your body. In this sense, chamomile acts like a benzodiazepine. Benzodiazepines are drugs that reduce anxiety and help you fall asleep.


Ginkgo is a Chinese herb that treats headaches and migraines, two common symptoms of depression. Ginkgo reduces stress and anxiety by lowering cortisol levels. Research shows that people who use ginkgo experience reduced anxiety compared to people who use placebos.


Tumeric reduces symptoms of major depressive disorder (MDD). Turmeric acts like an antidepressant, and its curcumin has been found to increase nerve growth in the brain’s frontal cortex and the hippocampus. These areas are important in mood because when they aren’t functioning at full potential, severe depression occurs.


Research shows that saffron is as effective for depression as Prozac. The exact reason for this isn’t known yet, but saffron is a promising alternative to the harsh chemical. Saffron also helps reduce stress, anxiety, OCD, and PMS. High doses of saffron should be avoided by pregnant women.

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body memory | Terezia Farkas | Beliefnet | depression help

Body Memory Differs From Body Flashback

You may find that a depressed person has aches and pains that can’t be pinned down to some current happening in life. For example, a depressed person may have back aches, stiff neck and shoulders, or even bruising that seems to appear without anything causing it. These body pains are memories of trauma, stress, and anxiety that the body is trying to expel.

Memory isn’t always stored in the brain. Body memory is the idea that the body is able to store memories. Cellular memory goes even further. It says that memories can be stored in every cell of the body, and is used to explain organ transplant memories. Body flashback differs from body/cell memory. Body flashback is a sudden, vivid memory that makes you feel like you’re reliving a trauma all over again.

Body Memory

Body memory has been used by doctors to explain phantom pain and repressed memories. Body memory is a response to physiological trauma. Usually the body has suffered some intense or prolonged stress. The body remembers and stores this memory in its cells. The memory shows up as phantom pain.

You might have heard stories of amputees who complain about pain in a missing limb, or how they can still feel the limb as part of the body. Amputees have been recorded as saying that the amputated leg or arm itches or has prickling sensations. Some amputees claim that the missing limb still feels changes in weather, or cold and hot air.

Phantom pain can happen in any part of the body. It can be aches and pains that don’t seem to have any real cause. Yet the aches and pains are very real. It’s because your body has stored some anxiety or trauma in that part of your body. Phantom pain is part of repressed memories of trauma and sexual abuse. Body memories also play a part in PTSD, anxiety, and depression.

During stress and anxiety, the body stiffens as it gets ready to flee or fight. Adrenaline courses throughout the body. Pain pathways are formed. If the same stress and anxiety keeps repeating itself enough times, the body learns or remembers the pain pathways. In depression, the pain pathway is accessed whenever the person faces stress or anxiety. Even the memory of the trauma of a hit or sexual abuse is remembered by the body in these pain pathways.

Body Flashback

Body flashback is different from body memory. A body flashback is a sudden, vivid memory that makes you feel like you’re experiencing an event all over again. The event can be traumatic, happy, sad, etc. Some suggest that a body flashback can even happen with a past life flashback or memory regression.

A body flashback can be triggered by any of your senses, an emotional memory, a reminder of the event, or an unrelated stressful event. Trauma literally changes your brain. Your brain stores the event on a different pathway than where you normally store memory. A sensory experience can thus trigger this forgotten pathway and cause vivid memories and reactions. This is the flashback. It happens in PTSD, and childhood/sexual trauma and abuse.

Cell memory

This is the idea that your all your cells have memory and also hold your personality traits. Imagine having all your memories and personality in every cell of your body! This means that organs like your heart could store your essence, maybe even what some would call your soul.

Cell memory has had scientific support because of organ transplants. Heart transplant patients often have a big change in personality. While some of it is because the patients have had a close call with death and so have had a life changing experience, most of these personality changes are unexplainable.

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Heart of Love Evolution - Surviving Depression | Terezia Farkas | depression help