If your lady is making you sleep on the couch, then it’s safe to say that you need to know how to improve communication in relationship. Sounds like you probably have some pretty serious communication issues. These issues often stem from waiting so long to address a problem that resentment builds. If a couple does this repeatedly, it leads to the man sleeping on the couch scenario. So, if want to know how to improve relationship communication, then your best bet is to have an honest, two-way conversation.


  1. Don’t wait for her. If you seriously want to work on relationship communication, then don’t wait for your girlfriend to come to you. Go to her. Most people will tell you to make the first move when picking women up, and it’s the same idea when you’re trying to improve relationship communication as well: Be a man about it.
  2. Address the problem. If you know what the problem is, just to talk to her about in an open and honest way. If you screwed up, own it and apologize. If you are clueless to the problem, then ask her. The key to working with that last scenario is never accept the answer, “You should know what the problem is.” Obviously, you don’t.
  3. Get all the hostility out. This may seem counterproductive to healthy relationship communication, but it’s not. It may result in a screaming match. Things might get thrown out of windows. She might even shatter your vintage “Led Zeppelin IV” record, but both of you need to get all the anger and resentment out. Usually, once a couple tells each other why they’re mad, they suddenly remember what they like about each other. Negative thoughts stick at the front of our brains, clouding positive thoughts. You just need to clear them out.
  4. Listen to her. Sometimes, this is the core of your relationship communication problem. Maybe you haven’t been listening to her lately, which absolutely enrages women. Now, when you’re with her, really listen to what she’s saying. It’s impossible to stress just how important this is. Just be sure to work on it.
  5. Keep the flow of communication open. Now that you’re off the couch, and back in the bed, try to keep it this way. The best way to do this is by understanding your lady. Women and men definitely don’t communicate the same way. Women are much more subtle, but they still let you know when they’re mad. You just have to pay attention. Try to learn her subtleties and cues. If you do, you’ll be able to address future problems easily. You’ll never again hear her say, “You should know what the problem is” because, now, you will know.

If you can do this, then not only will you be able to improve relationship communication, but you will strengthen your relationship as well.


More from Beliefnet and our partners
previous posts