Healing and Transformation

silhouette-man-jumping-beach-883937-printWe have come so far – and yet there is more to do – further to go. We must move onward and build strong trust and faith that we are supported in this grand spiritual journey. We are not – nor never were alone. We are not islands in the sea – we are all reflective of each other – reflecting the collective consciousness and part of the Divine (holy spirit). This has always been the way – seemingly separate from God – yet part of the web or matrix of energy that is our Source.

What this grand human experiment is about, is choice. Free will choice. Our experiences are not accidental. They come with purpose – they are made by our free will choices and our mental field. This field around us is both intelligent and purposeful. We are not victims of it – as we create it. Yet we are unaware of our power. So it is like we can see everything if we open our eyes – yet we believe we are blind of even worse, blindfolded.

This is not so.

We are architects of our life and lifetimes. The ascension process towards finer spirituality on this planet comes with awareness of who we are and our actual power. Feeling victims, and buying into the distorted media/ entertainment industry’s version of events – in which we are painted as the victims – and the themes are fear-based – we are separated from our cosmic vision and potential to “awaken” to whom we are.

The illusion of blindness is no excuse for behaving like spoiled children. Wanting something yet failing to take the necessary steps in hard-work and discipline to get there. This is often the fault of egotistical new age teachers who whilst often inspiring – also create a version of events – where as long as you keep paying them money and buying into their vision – you will manifest the same illusory “greatness” they have achieved from you giving them rent. So you are essentially renting a version of a person who shows you who you are.

That is not you.

You are unique.

Your blueprint is yours alone. The moment you follow others, you have in some way denied yourself. Expending energy on other people’s dreams, you remove yourself from your own dream.

Be yourself.

What new dreams will you create and aspire to produce in 2019? I wish for you a great and worthy journey. May you be enlightened.

With love and compassion,

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donald-trump-2005343_960_720The cosmic awakening reached its peak in 2012, and since then we have seen our greatest role models fall in a heap.

We have seen a breakdown in leadership and the knowledge that the media and governments are corrupt to the core. Even the financial system is morally bankrupt. Increasingly unethical behaviour has been publicly revealed. It is not that in previous times the rampant and systematic dehumanisation of people has not been occurring en masse – or the suppression of women – it is just that it is now coming out in the open – for our reflection and healing.

Donald Trump is no more sinister than previous leaders – he is just more open about it – and that is not a step backwards – it is on the contrary – a step forwards. He is a way-shower – showing us ourselves – showing us what is happening at the top – pointing to the “swamp” as he calls it.images-15

With the spread of knowledge, and everything available free on the internet, our economy is in paralysis. So many of the services that used to be provided for a fee, are now freely available. In addition, robotisation occurs exponentially. Fast-forward to a future run by computers. What will people do?

This is the unenviable challenge we face. The collective force is moving us forward, yet with inherent unanswered questions and challenges. Who will lead the computer revolution – and what will humanity become?

If technology can be used for our collective good, there is virtually no ceiling to our development – no problem beyond a solution.

How do we manage the economy and our financial structures?

Do we need to work?

What do we do about ownership? Money?

Surely, if robots can do all the work, that’s a revolutionary step forward? Only if we include spiritual values – compassion, kindness, sharing, co-creation and love.

With spiritual values – we are in an enviable situation – because we are close to so many breakthroughs in technology – there is almost a limitless upper limit.

Now, what is it we are moving towards? Essentially, the infantile concept of the creator “God” who came down and fashioned people out of sand, is shifting. Humanity is fashioning “robot” creatures with more abilities than we have (they never get tired) and with brains that can wire themselves, digital printers that can print new parts. We are becoming creator gods/goddesses.

Is this something to be feared?

Some days seem imperfect, yet one comes to realise these imperfections are all in the mind. And we learn to go deeper to realise the perfection.

It is us as humanity that is awakening. It is we who are becoming conscious. We are realising who we are.

With love and compassion,

Main Image via Pixabay.

Secondary Image via Pxhere.

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I met a beautiful person. She was so perfect to me.

Later I found it she was chronically depressed.

It seemed I wanted her to be perfect. She wasn’t.

She was living in her head and engulfed by sadness; she was cynical, cold, and detached because of her emotional overwhelm. However, I could see her potential was grand and wonderful. I wanted to be there for her. I wanted to help, to reach and touch her heart, and maybe to save her from drowning in an emotional swamp. I wanted so much to sing to her in her darkness, and hear her sing back to me in my darkness.

Did I see more of myself in her than I wanted to? Was I being called to go deeper into the forest – or face the storm head-on without shrinking? Carl Jung wrote something that I find intriguing and particularly relevant, “The world will ask you who you are, and if you don’t know, the world will tell you.”

I believe that it is in the questions, in the void, in the unknown, that I am unfolding.

As an empath, and I say this without intending any judgement, it felt like she couldn’t breathe, and I felt like she would swallow me down with her—not out of selfishness, but out of need or desperation.

As a man, I felt called to serve with honour and duty. I felt an innate desire to be strong for her. This instinctive yearning was triggered deep in my soul. Was that a bad thing? The alarm bells were ringing, and my manhood was being tested. I was feeling like a man that wants to be needed.

Responsibility and having something to live for is valuable. Some have even argued that meaning is the key to human fulfilment. It is inherently unsatisfying to live without purpose. Men want to help women, and the neediest ones need our help the most. They call to me to stand up for them.

Discernment is essential. Did I walk away and send love from a safe distance—or dive in deeply and attempt to save her? And by saving her, save myself!

I chose to step away to preserve myself, out of self-care and self-respect. I chose not to sacrifice myself for her needs.

Even the nicest-intentioned people are sometimes best kept at a distance. Did I make the right call?

We do have the right to choice – to choose our lessons – to choose who we are in-relationship to. If we feel like we are drowning, then we have a responsibility to do something about it. Hillel the Elder taught in Ethics of the Fathers, 1:14,“If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?”

We have to strike the balance between serving ourselves, our values, self-respect, honour and dignity—and serving our community, creating a perfect symphony between the relationship we have with ourselves and our relationship to others. There is an integral connection between the tadpole and its environment, and fellow tadpoles.

Many of the great spiritual teachers have reflected on human beings as being fish in the ocean, all connected to this essence called life (the water), yet also feeling separate from it. If the ocean is love, then we are the fish swimming inside.

In this way of thinking, is there any real separation? Or are we really all the same? As Yogi Bhajan puts it, “I am Thou, Thou is Me, Me is Thou.”

If we feel connected, are we wise to step away, or is it even possible to disconnect if we are innately connected? It’s like cutting off our life-force, or removing a fish from the sea—it would merely drown. Yet the sea is the ether of love. It is that which some call God. Disconnection is impossible.

I am reminded of an ambiguous poem by the British poet Stevie Smith, ‘Not Waving but Drowning,’

“Nobody heard him, the dead man, But still he lay moaning…”

This line stings. What was Smith referring to? (The subject) was possibly ignored, and drowning in his emotions and nobody was listening?

All writers, at least on some level, write about themselves. When she was a young girl, Stevie Smith’s father left her family to join the North Sea Patrol. In her prose, she seems to hark back to this abandonment and sense of loss,“…I was much too far out all my life.”

I keep questioning myself, asking how I could have acted differently:

Should I have listened closer? Should I have reached out my hand?

Was there an intrinsic betrayal?

I’ve always believed that beneath conflict and dysfunctional relationships, is merely hurt and painful feelings, or what one may call, the ‘pain-body.’

Hidden between the cracks of one’s ego identity that is desperately holding on to us being right (and the other person wrong), is the loving, authentic soul.

I don’t have all the answers. Nobody does. Ultimately, we all need to make our own choices.

I believe that underlying all our experiences, is the gaining of wisdom and the lesson of unconditional love. This love extends to others, just as it extends to ourselves. For in the end, as Rumi wrote, “Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

In relationships, sometimes the healthiest act of kindness is to walk away. Not because we are distancing ourselves from another (or our self), but because we are needing to get closer to who we are—to know ourselves. Clearing the swamp can be the most loving thing we can do for ourselves.

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Via FondoxDo you call yourself “spiritual?”

Is that a religion? What does it mean?

Does it mean you judge people because they don’t understand how elevated you are—because that’s what you are now, elevated—above other people?

Swami Satyananda taught (regarding the uncertain concept of the immaterial):

“Spiritual life begins with a question: Who am I? Where have I come from? What is my path of arrival? What will be the dock of my departure?”

This seems a more authentic way of being spiritual in that it merely acknowledges the important existential questions.

We need to keep coming back to our origin: where have we come from? Honour that part of our journey, and then see the expanse of our lives in terms of where we are going to end up. How will we depart this earthly venture?

Basically, ambition and success have become the new “en vogue” spiritual movement. This is spiritual materialism, and bypasses the essential question, “Who am I?” Yet, the ego self says: “It’s just a creation anyway, so who cares; I’m going to play this game!”
We also need to acknowledge our identity is made up by the conditioning of our parents and society, and finally, us—until we kill our ego, and kill who we thought we were. Or, simply, recreate ourselves. Superficiality and ceaseless spiritual shopping sprees avoid the real work.

It seems spiritual notions are causing a great deal of judgement and confusion in our modern world. People who have studied yoga, become yoga teachers, meditate, visit ashrams in India, study religions, become teachers, or devotees, or who simply read a few spiritual books are still wracked by judgements and insecurities, and their woundedness continues. Their shadows grow longer, their darkness ever more repressed.

They want to escape themselves—but they can’t. They fail, and they’re angry.

They divert their anger at people who are “not as spiritual” as them, who have not suffered like they have—the people who have had less tragedy, who can’t relate to their lofty status.

I’ve often been told, “You can’t understand me as you haven’t been (fill in the gap) like I have been, so your opinion is meaningless.”

The woundedness has become a reason to push people away, so we don’t have to face the awkward truth of being so uncomfortable with our wounds that we can’t bring another close. When we feel unlovable, we push people away. It’s like we don’t want to be reminded of this feeling of being unloved, even though the more we push people away, the more unloved we are.

Toko-pa Turner writes in ‘Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home’:

“While the New Age has awakened many to the power of creative intention, it has simultaneously pathologized the so-called ‘negative emotions’ and stricken them from our social palette of acceptability. We live under a kind of hegemony of positivity which emphasizes pleasure over pain, gain over loss, happiness over sadness, and the creative over the destructive. We are taught to ‘rise above’ things like anger, anxiety, sadness—and by whatever means necessary, stay in bliss and light. This kind of bypassing is dangerous because it teaches us to not only dissociate from the multiplicity of ourselves but from the magnificent spectrum of life itself.”

There is a bypassing of conscience here. I have felt judged because I ate fish, that I’m not spiritual enough. A conscious person would never eat flesh after all. One day everyone will be raw vegan as that’s the most spiritual path—or breatharian, because we can live off air and sunshine.

Maybe I’m not on your level, I’m sorry.

I do breathe the same air, walk on the same earth, and drink the same water. Sometimes I don’t even meditate at all. Some days I do no yoga or stretching. Some days I’m just bone lazy. I’ll admit it, I am not perfect (surprise, surprise).

I am just so tired of all the judgement and hypocrisy from so-called “spiritual” people or “conscious” people who go around telling people they are looking for a “conscious” man or woman. Run away.

The worst judgement I’ve experienced lately was at the hands of a “conscious woman” who on repeated occasions got mad at me (no apologies if she’s reading this). One time because I said “Come to India” on my Facebook feed and she thought that meant I wanted to travel with her. When I admitted that wasn’t my plan, she become furious. I wasn’t on her level.

Another time she asked me about her profile picture on Facebook—what did I think? I told her it looked a bit serious, “I would love to see your beautiful smile.” She was so angry—seething. I wasn’t appreciating her radiant light. She admitted to me that it was her “spiritual ego”—and urged me to appreciate her spiritual ego—because I needed to honour that part of her.

All I got from the exchange was that she is above reproach and can throw her fury around because it’s just her “spiritual ego.” Who could be worthy of such a towering spiritual being?

Spiritual bypassing happens when people can’t be real with each other—or themselves. It’s an escape from the self, an escape from being raw. Pretending is easier than facing the truth, that the person who stares back at you in the mirror is a human being like everyone else.

Perhaps for our real “spiritual life” to begin, we must first ask the questions:

“Who am I? Where have I come from? What is my path of arrival? What will be the dock of my departure?”

Maybe we need to just remove this “spiritual” concept from our vernacular and identify in a different way. The old religions seem unable to hold people to their narrow worldview.

So, the new age has taken people hostage—and these people are the new “spiritual.” Let’s just be human. Being human is more than enough for me!

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