Any time you sit, think about, and “stew” over what someone did to you, or simmer in anger about some past event, the real reason for your pain is because you’re cooking your own goose!
Guy Finley explains that all forms of rage, whether inwardly or outwardly directed, are the result of our thwarted attempts to possess what we think we need in order to be whole, happy, and in control.
The faster we try to go with whatever it may be that we are doing incorrectly, whether it’s hammering a nail or trying to nail down our happiness, the more and more frustrated we become for the unsatisfactory results. It is important to understand that we would never agree to give ourselves over to such mounting levels of frustration if we were not clinging to an unconscious certainty that things should not be going for us as they are. And so, being convinced that we know better than what our own experience is telling us — and that we ought to be able to overcome what is overcoming us — we then allow something unseen within us to urge us on to move even faster! Learning to see this contradiction in our own consciousness is how we learn to walk away from rushing through anything in life.
When you hear someone say, “I’m sick and tired of it,” what they are really saying without realizing it is that they’re sick and tired of suffering from their own lack of understanding. This all becomes clear once we understand that unhappiness does not come at us, it comes from us. For instance, impatience with our level of understanding is the very level of understanding we are impatient with. The understanding of this spiritual principle allows us to disconnect ourselves from our impatience. Life becomes instantly better. For one thing, the frustration fades. In its place, learning flowers. And the more we inwardly grow, the easier our whole life flows.
This new idea of acting to deliberately disconnect ourselves from whatever we think has us blocked leads us to true self-liberation because we have never been trapped by anything outside of our own lack of understanding. This is why even the attempt to disconnect ourselves from the limitations of our present life-level already belongs to a higher level of understanding. This conscious action on your part “works” by gradually breaking down the painful circle-of-self that is repeatedly formed by asking the problem for the solution. Barriers begin to crumble and disappear, because you have stopped creating them. In the truest meaning of the words, you are getting out of your own way! Practice self-disconnect as often as you can. The more you work at this special kind of letting go, the freer your days will flow and the higher your life will go.