When we choose Conscious Parenting there is no shortage of teachable moments. Almost every situation offers us a moment to share insight, to point out something unique about ourselves or the world and to help our child become critical thinkers about not only their lives, but the world we live in. The question at hand […]
Our individual energy is a powerful thing. Personally if I am ungrounded (disconnected, panicked, frustrated, or outside my own body) I can short out many things from cars to computers. Once I was in Montauk and Caidin, my husband and I were out driving around. Out of nowhere a huge storm cell swept across the island bringing with is incredibly high winds, torrential rain and intense lightning strikes. I was panicked and I was definitely afraid – not for myself, but I wanted Caidin to be safe. As I turned the key in the ignition, the car would not start. There was nothing. My husband said to me, ground yourself and try again. I did and the car started. The same thing happens with me and computers. If I’m frustrated or anxious to get something done, or posted I tend to crash my computer.
Yesterday, we bought Caidin his first tablet. After waiting five hours for the battery to charge, he then had to wait for me to add apps and delete things that came preloaded. When it was finally ready for him, he was so excited, or frustrated, or both, I’m not sure which, the thing froze on him. He was so upset. After he calmed down, it gave me an opportunity to remind him about the ways in which our energy can affect things and that it is most noticeable with electronics, but it can also affects people and animals and our surroundings just as much, it just isn’t as noticeable.
Below I introduce four tools that you can share with your child. These will help him to better manage his own energy. When our children have this awareness and have these tools it gives them a sense of empowerment as they no longer need to feel out of control.
Your child can use these tools to help manage both energetic states and emotions.
Energetic states include: hyper, anxious, uncertain, lonely, confused, and frustrated.
Emotions include: Sad, anticipation, anger, disapproval or fear.
Grounding – Grounding is the process of connecting one’s body to the earth. For children you can have them imagine roots growing out of the feet into the ground, like a tree; you can also have them lay down on the floor and imagine sinking into the earth, or the earth embracing them.
Collecting – Have you ever heard the expression ‘pull yourself together’? Or maybe ‘I was beside myself’? Both of these expressions speak to what happens when our energy gets scattered. We become energetically fragmented and disconnected from our inner core. You can have your child close her eyes and imagine that her spine is magnetic, then have her request that all of her energy return to her own body.
Bubbles – Bubbles are one of the best tools to teach your child for releasing emotions and energy. Whether they feel hyper, anxious, fearful, sad or lonely the ability to release what we are feeling can be incredibly helpful. Have your child close his eyes and picture a big bubble, like a giant soap bubble out in front of him. Then have him blow the energy he wants to release out into the bubble. Once he releases what he doesn’t want, have him pour into his body the energy he does want such as joy, happiness or confidence.
Magnets – Similar to bubbles, but for some kids the idea of magnets is easier or more powerful. Have your child close her eyes and envision a magnet, like a horseshoe magnet, out in front of her. Then have her let the magnet pull out whatever energy she wants to let go of. Lastly, as you did with the Bubbles tool, have her fill in with an energy she’d like to experience.
I started introducing tools to Caidin when he was a newborn. Actually, when he was in utero, I guess. I would ground myself every day and in turn he would experience that sense of connection and safety that comes when we are grounded. When Caidin was a year old we were at a park in Brooklyn and Dr. Michel Cohen, who wrote The New Basics (one of my favorite, no nonsense pediatric parenting guides), was there asking parents questions for a radio show he was doing. He came over to talk to us and Caidin was just sitting happily in the swing enjoying himself. Dr. Cohen looked at him and said with a bit of surprise ‘He’s a very calm baby.’ I just smiled and said ‘yes he’s very grounded.’
It was interesting that Dr. Cohen could see the difference in Caidin. In any event, I continued to share tools with Caidin as he has gotten older. When he was still unable to talk, we used them to release anger and frustration around communication issues; as he started to venture out into the world we used them to manage fear, anxiety and uncertainty. As he’s moved into elementary school we have used them to help manage his exuberance and as a way to keep himself collected during school.
The really great part of this is that the tools are theirs to use whenever they need them. One of Caidin’s teachers once said to me, ‘when he gets overwhelmed, I notice that he closes his eyes and then exhales and then he seems to be better.’ Bubbles! And I’m not even there to remind him.
Lastly, remember that older kids don’t like to be told to do things. It’s often better to use the tools yourself; explaining what you’re doing and letting them know that these tools can help them too. Offer to explain how they work and then let them explore in what ways they might be of benefit.
© 2012 Christine Agro
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Christine Agro is a Clairvoyant, Naturopath, Master Herbalist, Conscious Mom and Author of 50 Ways to Live Life Consciously as well as of The Conscious Living Wisdom Cards (Special Moms’ Edition). Christine is founder of The Conscious Mom’s Guide , a membership site where she helps support you on your own journey of living life consciously and on your journey of being a Conscious parent. You can also join Christine on Facebook. To contact Christine, invite her to speak or to schedule an appointment with her please email her.