God's Comic

After many years as a “Christian comedian” I
have often been asked if I thought God had a sense of humor? Well here are a
couple examples where I would vote for the affirmative.

In all my many years on earth I can’t begin to
count the times I have bitten my tongue. Everyone has experienced this
annoyance and every time I do it makes me wonder if this is one of God’s great
practical jokes?

Being God and all powerful, when you finally get
around to creating worshipers it probably makes sense to make them somewhat
entertaining. Being Omniscient he also must have anticipated our rebellion and
so worked in the funny stuff as retribution for what was coming. Biting your
tongue being one of these. Why? Because the reason we bite our tongue is
because God designed it to be permanently fixed next to our teeth.

you think He didn’t see this catastrophe potential? Your tongue may be the
softest item on your body, whose job is to manipulate food all the while trying
to avoid the hardest thing on our body, our teeth. TEETH! Their only purpose is
to cut, grind, chew, crush and mutilate food, which normally comes in the same
texture as your tongue.

Just as sharks are known for mistaking surfers
for seals and consequently making meat of them, why would one expect our teeth
to do anything less when it comes to tongue chewing? Heck I have even bitten my
own finger before while putting a morsel of food in my pie hole which not only
hurts but couldn’t possibly make you feel any more stupid.

Another part of our body positioned for maximum
hilarity from Gods front row seat in our comedy of errors is our shins. Shins
are also some of the most sensitive parts of our body and thus were positioned
nice and low on our legs, (technically referred to as “coffee-table height”)
right in the front mind you for maximum damage opportunity.

If God didn’t want us to get hurt he would have
either A) placed then behind our legs where our calves are now so they would
rarely be smashed, or B) armor plate our shins with some kind of protective
shield. They say our body is full of iron that would have been perfect! God
must have foreseen much comedy potential in the leg area since that is also
what our toes inhabit. Toes are so good at smashing into things, especially in
the dark that they actually necessitated the invention of shoes.

Our thighs are ripe for a Charlie horse, which
is perfect for rounding out the leg as a human whoopee cushion for Gods enjoyment.
Of course for men, God initiated a special laugh getter known as the groin in
mixed company. Yeah nothing like taking an organ from inside your body and
putting it on the outside to ensure a lot of potential yuks throughout the year.

Lastly there is the aptly named “funny bone”
which, when struck, is funny only for the observer as opposed to the receiver
who finds nothing funny about it whatsoever. The fact that it was named that
shows that God had this planned all along to find much entertainment from his
creation. Maybe it serves us right after all when we consider what He was
forced to sacrifice on our behalf, and to be fair He did invent gravity so all
of us can enjoy the pleasure of watching somebody slip on the ice. Yeah getting
hurt is kinda funny, as long as it happens to someone else. 

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