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Doing Life Together

John regularly uses pornography. He wonders if he is addicted or is developing an addiction. The Head of the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), Dr. Norma Volkow, supports the inclusion of sexual addictions, with pornography as a contributor to the larger field of addictions. Volkow and colleagues describe a three-stage model of neurobiochemical addiction. The three…

What happens to you in childhood matters. It doesn’t determine your life course, but does influence it. Adverse childhood experiences can derail you in adult life if you aren’t aware and learn new ways to respond. One adverse childhood experience is being raised by narcissistic parents. The impact can be long-lasting and affect your adult…

I want you to try something. Put a black dot on a white piece of paper. Now, look at the piece of paper and tell me what you see. Did you focus on that black dot in the center of the page? Or did you think about all the white space surrounding the dot? Where…

I looked at my colleague who used to feel passion and excitement for her job. Now, all she can do is make it through the day. Something has changed. She is disconnected and flat in her conversations. She has all the signs of burn out and needs recovery. It could happen to any of us if we aren’t…

Its easy to complain about another person and much harder to work on ourselves. When you really think about what you can do to make a relationship better, it usually comes down to you making changes. So I’ve come up with 10 things you can do to improve your relationship. Read through the list. One…

One of my favorite books is the classic, Wuthering Heights, written by Emily Bronte. It’s a story of passionate love between Heathcliff and Catherine who have known each other since childhood. Life separates them. When Heathcliff hears that his Catherine has died, he feels deep anguishes and cries out, “Be with me always. Take any form-drive…

Sometimes you just want that one or two adult friends who can do life with you. But finding those friends can be somewhat of a challenge given our busy lives. In fact, when people are asked, many will say they have no real serious friendships (lots of superficial friends) or that they might have one…

Rachel has conflict every day. She takes conflict as a personal assault. Her thinking is rigid and emotions are not managed. She blames others and never cares if she harms people or acts in lawless ways. In fact, she is among the more than 70% of people with antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) who can be found in prisons and substance abuse clinics. With someone who…

By now, you may have heard the excitement about esketamine as a breakthrough new drug for treatment resistant depression. Some people call it a game changer in the treatment of depression. One of the benefits seems to be that it quickly resolves symptoms of suicidality. Esketamine is now an FDA approved medication for treatment resistant depression (depression that doesn’t respond to…

“I love my partner. We are happy, but I am cheating on him.” This statement makes no sense to most of us. People who cheat are in bad marriages, right? Well, not necessarily. Yes, a bad marriage can be incentive to cheat, but people in happy marriages cheat too. And the reasons for this might…
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