Oh My Stars

No matter how you slice the demographic pie, there’s always that one guy who makes everyone else in his group look bad.

Over the years I have known many kind and caring and decent Capricorns. On a bad day, they have a reputation for being a bit stiff, and maybe a little too likely to take themselves (and life in general) a little more seriously than perhaps they should. But like I said, despite the many sweet and wonderful Capricorns I’ve known over the years… there’s always That One Guy who backs up the worst stereotypes and ruins the Sign Of The Goat for everyone else who shares it.

For Capricorn, that guy is Kim Jong-un, leader of North Korea.


One of the problems of taking an astrological look at anything to do with North Korea is the lack of certainty about dates. North Korea in general is notoriously un-forthcoming about even minor details of life within its borders. The birthdates and places of its leaders are no exception. However, we can state with a high degree of confidence that Kim Jong-un was born on January 8… although whether that was January 1983 or 1984, we can’t be sure. Thus we know that his Sun is at 17° Capricorn, and for purposes of this blog entry, that’s all we need to know.

Regardless of the rest of the chart, we know that transiting Uranus has slowed down and gone retrograde within a degree of the exact square to his Sun. That, and we can expect the Uranus Pluto Square to have a significant effect on Kim for at least the next two years. In fact, he came into power as it was coming into effect.

The Sun in the birth chart is your Ego, and oh my… what a bruising that has taken lately for Dear Leader. There is an upcoming movie called “The Interview,” a comedy that tells the tale of a celebrity interviewer who is recruited by the CIA to kill Kim Jong-un. It is a comedy, but Dear Leader is not laughing.

On June 25th of this year, as Mars opposite Uranus was squaring Kim’s Sun, the Korean Central News Agency promised stern and merciless retaliation if the film is released… in fact, calling it “an act of war.” And this without even seeing an advance screening!

Kim’s feathers have been ruffled again recently, with the release of a music video from China, featuring scenes of various people dancing, but with Kim’s head pasted on them. Apparently, Dear Leader is a bit touchy when it comes to people poking fun at him. Like, threatening war-type touchy.

North Koreans in general can be forgiven for being a little behind the curve as far as how information in the Internet Age works, so… if any agents of Kim are out there reading this… please convey this to the Glorious One: there’s a thing called the Streisand Effect. It was named after Barbra Streisand when, in 2003, her efforts to have a photo of her residence removed from the Internet resulted in far more attention being drawn to the matter than it would’ve garnered otherwise. Frankly, only the most diehard fans would normally care about Barbara’s mansion… but thanks to her loud protests, not only does everyone know where she lives, she’s actually got “the Streisand effect” named after her.

I bring this up because Kim Jong-un has recently demanded that the aforementioned video originating in China be removed immediately from the Internet (because, that’s how the Internet works, I guess they figure). If he’d just had the sense (and lacked the inflated ego) required to let it go, no one would have noticed.

As it stands though, Kim has made a mockery of himself where no one would have noticed before otherwise. Do you think Obama and Putin threaten to kill people that parody them? Heck no, they’re too busy killing other people for other reasons entirely, thank you very much. That’s how real leadership works, Kim!

Anyway, here’s the video. Enjoy it as freely and subversively as I do!

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The lesson here is, I believe… lighten up already.

Is Kim likely to learn the lesson that complaining about people trying to make you look ridiculous just makes you look more ridiculous? It’s hard to say. But given that Uranus will still be square Kim’s Sun on October 10… the release date for “The Interview”… and that the release date is only two days after a lunar eclipse which is also square Kim’s Sun, I am willing to bet Kim isn’t going to let this go at all.

Oh: just in case you’re worried that poking fun at Kim Jong-Il and/or North Korea is going to trigger some sort of Apocalypse: please keep in mind that although being scared of North Korea is a popular sport among some commentators and filmmakers, overall, North Korea doesn’t have the technology to deliver a pizza to North America, let alone a bomb.

Finally, while were at it, let’s make fun of Kim’s dad, who was just as monstrous a person as well, and just as fat while ruling over starving millions of North Koreans. Dance, tyrant, dance!

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