Fighting Couple

Tiger Woods is the greatest golfer to ever play the game. He was the highest paid athlete in the world and became a certified legend. in 2009, the life of Woods would be changed forever after then-wife, Elin Nordegren, attacked him for cheating on her multiple times. This followed backing into a fire hydrant and hitting a tree intoxicated. Recently, Wood was found drunk at the wheel again and was arrested. Alcohol was not only ruining Woods' stellar career but it split up his marriage. Actor Mel Gibson suffered the same fate by drinking too much. His alcohol induced diatribe stalled his career and destroyed his marriage. “My life is over,” Gibson said after his anti-Semitic comments went viral. Later his wife of 30 years filed for divorce. There is no doubt that once alcohol gets its hooks into a person, it creates mayhem for all those around them. Alcoholism can find a way into anyone's life whether they're rich, poor, famous or work on Main Street. Is alcohol destroying your marriage? If so, here is what to look out for.

You refuse to see the truth.

Alcohol is one of the most popular recreational substances. But if we take a step back and are honest, there might be a pattern of abuse, which has already formed. Maybe a social drink became more regular or a couple of drinks after work increased into a bottle of liqueur. Is your spouse looking for relief by drinking on a regular basis? That could be a precursor to abuse as well. Using alcohol as a crutch in the short-term will only increase in the long-run, it won't get better without help.
If you notice your spouse drinking more than usual, be honest with yourself and with them.

It takes the filters off.

Did you ever wonder why fights break out in bars so much? Alcohol impedes your filters and your inhibitions. It makes you say things and take actions that are not in your character. Things like admitting that you flirted with the bank teller or telling your spouse that they 'look fat' will seem harmless when you're drunk. However, these add fuel to the conversation because tempers are hotter with the use of alcohol and emotions run raw. Getting drunk increases the risk for unfiltered behavior for those with a strong tendency to suppress feelings when sober, a study found. "Among individuals who reported a high inclination to suppress feelings of anger, a 10 percent increase in drinking to the point of intoxication was associated with a 5 percent increase in violence," livescience.com reported.

Sometimes it leads to domestic abuse.

Alcohol can lead to domestic abuse in some cases. They can start as veiled threats and start to become violent as the drinking increases. "If your partner engages in risky behavior, seemingly to scare you or show you that they are in control, such as driving too fast and refusing to slow down when you ask, consider that troubling," Divorced Moms reported. According to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, 24 people per minute are victims of rape, physical violence or stalking by an intimate partner in the United States. Additionally, 1 in 4 women will become victims of abuse in relationships. Based on reports from 10 countries, between 55 percent and 95 percent of women who had been physically abused by their partners had never contacted non-governmental organizations, shelters or the police for help.

It makes problems bigger.

Author and therapist Christine Northam said people really don't even know how much that they are drinking. She gives clients a questionnaire to fill out. One of the questions is 'How much alcohol do you drink?' She said: "Often I'll ask people in counseling 'Do you drink much?' and they say 'No'. But looking at their survey results reveals otherwise." All relationships have issues and misunderstandings. Since our filters are off, we can make our problems a lot bigger by bringing up all the things that are bothering us. Under normal circumstances, most of those things might not bother the person. But add a few drinks into the mix, it can become ugly. Calmly tell your spouse that you will talk things over issues when they are sober.

It creates emotional turmoil.

Alcohol can lead to emotional turmoil in marriage because people who drink more are unpredictable. You never know when they will get angry sad or have a fit. This adds more pressure on the marriage and could make the other spouse drink to cope with all the strife and anxiety. When someone drinks too much they start neglecting their duties at home and at work. Also, when drinking starts interfering with everyday activities, it's a problem that needs to be addressed. The addiction will eventually master the victim as the need for more alcohol is needed to maintain their lifestyle. Eventually, they will take down the entire family.

Alcohol doesn't need to end your marriage, but you do need to become more diligent. Seek out a therapist, social worker or a family member and find support as you can't do this alone. Your spouse might lash out or become violent and an intervention by a professional might be necessary. If you are educated on your options and know what to expect, then a plan can be put into play. The bottom line is that alcohol will destroy your marriage if you give it room to grow. We watched alcohol destroy the relationships and careers of the famous like Woods and Gibson--don't allow it to take your marriage as well.
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