Sex, sex and more sex, it's really everywhere you turn! They can be one-night stands, friends-with-benefits and other encounters of carnality. The images from the media and our heads lay seduction at every turn. It has become an outlet to sleep with anyone because we have an innate drive to do so. This is great for the world, Hollywood and for the porn industry, but not for the Christian. Sex was never intended to be used as a recreational activity and unfortunately, it has become something people treat flippantly, regardless of religion. People see sex in magazines and online as being glamorous with no consequences for their actions, because they don't see the adverse repercussions of it immediately. Yet, people keep their sex lives buried (or try to) from God and this makes little sense for the believer as everything is interconnected. Christians are deemed to have another standard and let's face it, friends, we are running wild! Let's consider 5 of the reasons people want and perhaps demand casual sex.
There is a lack of commitment.
When we're watching a story on television about casual sex, the characters seem to become well-adjusted to the lack of commitment. Sometimes one will fall in love with the other, but for the most part, the no-strings rule seems to work on the screen. In actuality, when we engage in casual sex, a number of problems can occur like sexually-transmitted diseases and a loss of self-esteem. Sex has the power to strengthen people, so it is nearly impossible to have sex that does not involve giving of the whole self. You will lose an inestimable part of yourself when having intimacy with anyone.
It's too inviting.Hookup apps like Grindr or Tinder present another way to have sex without making a commitment. These dating apps have a reputation for a reason. Many of its users are looking for sex, and they don't mince words about it. Some Christians actually found quality people, but these are rare. "Tinder has a reputation as a hookup app for a reason. If sexual sin is an area where you struggle—and for many of us that is the case—then don’t open the door for your pursuit of holiness to be derailed by it," singleroots.com reported. When Jesus withstood the devil’s tricks, He did so each time by responding with a verse from Scripture. We need to do the same when going to any hookup apps.
It's not prized.Man has a desire to be loved and to be cherished, but humans have another side when it comes to intimacy. "Until sex is seen as a powerful expression of covenant love, wrapped in mystery and complexity, marriages will continue to fall apart," author Frank Powell explained. Having casual relationships not only feeds lust, it will leave you feeling empty as it leads to nothing valuable. Jesus put it another way: “I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her already committed adultery with her in his heart." When we choose to do things God’s way, we can avoid destruction, feeling cheap and disappointed when engaging in casual sex. Ask the Holy Spirit to search your heart and give you wisdom before making the decision about going into a sexual relationship.
It's more accepted.Many people when they were kids were taught that sex was wrong and it shouldn't be talked about. This changed during the 1960s with the sexual revolution, endless promiscuity and premarital sex. When people are told that they shouldn't have casual sex, then they're going to do it. Before the sexual revolution, people would hide their lifestyle and today there is less of a stigma attached to casual sex.
There are no emotional ties.With casual sex, you check your emotions at the door and there are no worries about texting them the next day. This also happens in the church as well. In a blog titled "Loving Jesus & Hooking Up,” author and blogger Mary DeMuth shared the hookup culture at church is quite active. "One person described what it was like to be in a singles ministry where many folks (typically post-divorce) felt hooking up was fine. In fact, they thought he was strange for wanting to get married." Joe McIlhaney and Freda Bush wrote in the book, Hooked, that you are still forging emotional bonds with the person you're having casual sex with. "Scientists are confirming that sex is more than a momentary physical act. It produces powerful, even lifelong changes in our brains that direct and influences our future to a surprising degree.” Ouch, if Christians are viewing sex in this manner, how are we different from the world?
It’s really important for Christians to know God created sex other than to have a family as there is nothing wrong with the enjoyment of it. But God also wants His children to develop love and intimacy with one another and a deeper connection. We can find in 1Thessalonians 4:3-5: "It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality and that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable." If you're not a Christian, it is just as damaging because casual sex will leave you empty and may become more damaging than you originally thought.