Baby showers offer fun ways to celebrate the expecting parents and help them prepare for their bundle of joy. These events typically involve lots of excitement and laughs, but it’s still essential to mind your manners. Whether you’re a host or guest, there are certain faux pas you’ll want to avoid. Here are some rude things you can do at a baby shower and how to avoid them.
Embarrassing the mom-to-be.
It would be best to avoid squeezing or touching the belly of the expecting mother and telling her how big she is. It’s a baby shower, not a roast, so you want the expectant parents to be comfortable and enjoy themselves. You should also avoid embarrassing the expecting mother; playing games like guessing the baby’s gender or measuring the mom’s belly may be uncomfortable for the new mother. The best thing to do is to have games approved before the baby shower.
Serving food the expectant parents don’t eat.
Remember, you want the expecting parents to enjoy their baby shower, so don’t plan a menu around soft cheeses or sushi. Ask the mom-to-be if she has food preferences or any foods she dislikes and wants to avoid. You should also ask the guests if they have any food allergies.
Drinking too much.
Pregnant people are instructed to avoid alcohol, but most are okay with their guests enjoying some libations at the baby shower. However, that doesn’t give you the green light to get wasted, so guests should avoid drinking too many cocktails. The expectant mother will skip the drinks, and guests should enjoy the shower more than the mimosas.
Sharing childbirth horror stories.
A baby shower isn’t the place to share the traumatic experiences of your friends or your terrifying birthing story, so refrain from stories about complex labor issues or challenging deliveries. Everyone has a story, but the baby shower may not be the best place to share them, especially if this is the mom-to-be’s first child.
Discussing other guests’ fertility.
Fertility can be a tricky topic for some people, so it would be best to avoid asking other guests when they’re going to have a baby or trying to encourage them to have kids. There could be someone there who’s recently experienced a miscarriage or has been trying to have a baby for years.
Insisting the couple reveal the sex.
The decision to discover and reveal the sex of their unborn child is personal and should be valued. If the baby shower occurs before birth and the couple hasn’t done a gender reveal, don’t pressure the couple to share the baby’s gender. Let them have their special moment and privacy if that’s what they want.
Buying off-registry gifts.
The new parents requested specific gifts they’ll need to get ready for the baby, so only buy gifts on the registry. You should be particularly mindful of adoptive parents’ needs if they choose to have a baby shower. When attending a shower before a child’s adoption, ensure that your card and gift are appropriate. Newborn clothing is typically suitable for a birth, but some adopted children are older, so talk to the shower host about the gender and age of the child.
You might also consider what to do about gifts if you can’t make the baby shower. If you are close to the mom-to-be, you could consider sending a small gift for her to open at the shower. Other family and friends who can’t make the shower can wait until after the baby’s birth to send a gift.
Bringing unsolicited guests.
Bringing uninvited guests to most occasions, including a baby shower, is rude, so no surprise friends or family members. If the invitation doesn’t have anyone else’s name, you’re the only one who should attend. If you RSVP’d for one, then you should show up by yourself.
Showing up late or overstaying your welcome.
The new parents are likely tired, whether the shower is before or after birth. They may need to nurse, or the baby might be irritable and tired, so avoid overstaying your welcome. It would also be best to respect the start time, as showers typically have scheduled activities, so come on time and don’t be the last to leave. You can follow the parameters of the invitation loosely. Sometimes people are enjoying themselves and don’t want to leave, but when it gets late, let the mom-to-be relax and go home.
Throwing a shower without asking the expecting parents.
Not all religions, cultures or individuals participate in pre-birth activities. Some see any celebrations before the baby’s birth as premature and tempting fate at worse. Before hosting any activities, ensure the parents want to have something. A surprise baby shower seems like a fun idea, but think about how the mom-to-be will receive it, who likely would’ve liked to prepare for the event.
Consider their preferences and personality as you ponder the baby shower’s vibes. A theme and games aren’t required, and the tone and style of the baby shower should keep the expectant parents in mind.
Not honoring social media requests.
Sometimes, people don’t want pictures from their private events on social media, so if the expectant parents make this request, respect their wants. If the parents ask you to wait until after a specific time frame, it would be best to honor their request. It would also help if you didn’t post unflattering photos. If you have to think about it, don’t post it.
A baby shower is supposed to be a happy day for the expecting parents and their guests. However, indulging in any of these rude behaviors may ruin their special day, so it would be best to honor the requests of the expecting parents as they prepare for their bundle of joy.