“Life is an uphill battle. But it’s our choice whether or not we make it up the mountain. We can choose to give up or keep climbing to see the view at the top. The view is almost always worth the climb.”-Alexis Wohler. God put this saying on my heart when I was going through […]
Around our families, we often let our most ugly side show without a second thought. We treat them the worst because we expect them to automatically forgive us, no matter how we treat them or how we react to them. We are then being expected to react the same way towards them, whenever they do something bad or say something bad to us. We expect them, and they expect us, to accept what goes on and never say how we truly feel about the way we are being treated by them. No one in our families really expects a fight. We all expect everyone to just take attitudes and outbursts that happen with a grain of salt.
As much as we hate it when our families ridicule , critique and attack us, we also can’t keep treating our families like dirt and then expect them to keep letting it happen. Vice versa for them- they can’t expect us to not get even a little upset after something goes down, no matter how stupid the argument might be. The important thing is to remember to take time away from them and cool down before returning to talk about the situation. As hard as it is, try to react with calmness towards the other person.
Another newsflash- if God had that attitude with us, we’d all be pretty much damned into Hell for our words and actions towards our families and any other group that we are in. If God felt the way we do towards others or if He acted the way we act, none of us would be saved by the cross. He would have just said “ok, if that’s the way you feel, then I’m leaving.”
The biggest question that has been on my mind recently, is how come we treat our families so much worse than any other group of people? We treat them horribly and we constantly get away with it. Why? Think about it- these are our family members, the people we are supposed to love no matter what, unconditionally. So how come we mess up so badly in that area? Yes, it is because of sin, and because of Satan messing with us. Because of sin, this world will never be perfect. But the other reality of it is, we must keep looking at ourselves and know that we are the ones causing the problems in our families and must work to change ourselves. It doesn’t matter if the other people who hurt us, don’t change. What matters is how react to them and how we change within ourselves. The change must happen for us and within us first. Once we look inside ourselves and ask for help from God, He can help us change our outlook in dealing with people, especially within our families. Only then can we start to notice a change in how we speak and act around others. We also must be willing to change ourselves for the better too. We can’t expect others to change if we don’t change our attitudes too. The change starts with us. Be the bigger person and make a better life for yourself and the people around you. Be able to see the areas where you need to make changes and be willing to try them. It may not always be easy, but with God there is nothing you can’t do.
It takes a lot of guts to be the first person to tell someone else that you’re sorry for how you acted. It also takes integrity to admit that you were the one that was wrong. Pray about the things that are going on in your family and with anyone else in your life. Ask God to help calm anything you might be feeling and for you to figure out how to control your tongue even when it’s difficult and even when it’s the very last thing you want to do in that moment.