Jimmy Evans, the founder of the Dallas, Texas-based ministry XO Marriage, is offering up some hard truths about the Church’s failures in supporting marriages. In an interview with The Christian Post, Evans noted how Americans still have an interest in marriage, yet are frightened by the commitment. “Part of the problem is a lot of the Church just simply isn’t interested in marriage. Many pastors don’t speak on the subject of marriage, or if they do, they don’t speak with authority from the scriptures in a manner that really equips people to be married.” According to a statistic cited by Evans, 85% of churches do not have a budget for marriage ministry.

Evans noted the many challenges churches face in a society growing increasingly dependent on technology. That is why his ministry is offering digital marriage courses free online to encourage churches to use their resources. While technology has offered his ministry an opportunity to spread its resources, he also noted the negative impact it has had on many couples. “You’ve certainly got all the technology, cell phones. How many times have you gone into a restaurant and you look around at other couples, and everybody’s just sitting there together with their phones in front of them?” he said. An even greater problem brought on by technology is the easy access to pornography. One study in 2019 found that 87% of men aged 18 to 35 accessed porn weekly.

One issue Evans admitted was that many churches don’t address marriage because their own leaders are struggling in their marriages. “If you’re struggling in your own marriage, you’re not going to get up and preach on it,” he said. A 2025 Barna study found that pastors struggled with relational flourishing, with many not even realizing it. He recalled preaching a sermon at his friend’s church only to have the church’s pastor admit to him that he had to work on his own marriage.

One of the most damaging concepts to successful marriages, according to Evans, is the idea of “soul-mates” or finding the right person rather than being the right person to marry. “Soulmates are forged, they’re not found. … One of the myths about marriage is you have this honeymoon phase and it gets worse. The truth is, when you’re married correctly, it gets better and better and better and better,” he said. He also noted that more churches are focused on so-called “divorce recovery” rather than intervening before the divorce becomes a reality. Evans’s friend, Jimmy Witcher, a longtime board member of the ministry that is preparing to take over, found himself very nearly divorcing his own wife 30 years ago. He credited the Lord for saving his marriage. He said the resources of XO Marriage would have greatly helped he and his wife. “I wish we knew we needed to be working on our marriage,” he said. “I wish we had the resources that XO Marriage is presenting and producing now. We could have used that 32 years ago.”