All relationships are different. Some are intimate, others neighborly, community-based, or work-based. There are best friends and acquaintances, close relatives, and distant cousins.

However, every single relationship has one thing in common.

How they make us feel.


Whether we just meet an individual, barely know them or are extremely close – a feeling is emitted when in their presence.

Relationships represent an emotional investment of love, the greatest commodity in life.

And every individual a spoke in our wheel of life.

And often, we simply spin forward with all of them. 

But should we?

It is a tragedy to spend time with anyone who does not have the ability to truly love us. It impedes our light from shining bright enough to fulfill our own God-given purpose. Only those who love us for who we are can allow us the bandwidth to live authentically rather than cast their shadow over us.

How do we determine whether we have invested in the right people?

It’s easy to get caught up in comparisons, tit for tat and the perceived perfect relationship. But relationships can’t be measured despite their differences in shapes and sizes.

Instead, the true value of a relationship lies in the one thing they all have in common…

Relationships are how people make us feel.

It’s not dissecting all the little issues and imperfections, it’s about quantifying how that all adds up when you are in that individual’s presence.

This is the true test of a solid emotional investment.

We need to ask these 5 questions to determine whether or not we are investing in the right people:


1. When I am with this person do I feel beautiful both inside and out?

2.  When I am with this person do I feel important to them?

3. When I am with this person do I feel respected?

4. When I am with this person do I feel good about who I am?

5. When I am with this person do I feel heard?

6. When I am with this person do I feel understood?

7. When I am with this person do I feel loved?


If we answer no to any of these questions, this person is not a good emotional investment.

It is time to cut the losses.

It is a relationship with an individual whose ego is so large it insists on casting a shadow on love.


(Photo courtesy of Pexels)

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