My previous relationship was very hard on me and I don’t know why I chose it and continued to choose it. I guess I was lucky to get out of it in the end when I did, as many stay in toxic relationships for many years or decades, for a lifetime or even lifetimes. There […]
I’ve pondered on this question, and it seems to me that anything that happens to us can occur on various levels on a continuum between good, neutral and bad. Really how we view something can fundamentally change it. There are even extreme examples of seeing something that seems horrible as a blessing.
How we look at events, intrinsically changes them. So when we change how we look at something, the thing we look at changes.
A neutral example would be a haircut. If you viewed this as a pleasurable, relaxing activity, where you get to sit and relax and enjoy someone’s attention, then it will be a pleasant event in your diary. Consider another person who views the same event as a torture.
I recall the film “Life is Beautiful” (Italian: La vita è bella) which was set during the Holocaust. The main character (Roberto Benigni) was a comedian who play-acted throughout the serious themes of the film, pretending that it was all a game, in order to protect his son from the horror and suffering of what was happening.
Benigni plays Guido Orefice, a Jewish Italian bookshop owner, who decides to protect his son from realizing the actual horror of the Nazi concentration camp. Written and directed by Benigni, the story was inspired by his own father, who survived three years in the Bergen-Belsen concentration camp.
In the film, Guido tells his son (Joshua) that he has set up the camp as a game. Every test is governed by a points system in which the first person to 1000 points, wins a tank. So people who cry or complain lose points, whilst people who hide from the camp guards earn extra points.The guards are scary because they want the tank for themselves. The disappearing people (killed) are hiding to score more points in order to win the game.
This great film is an interesting analogy for the point that perspective is everything. When there is a purpose to suffering, it diminishes the pain and makes it worthwhile.
As human beings, it is in our nature to experience suffering. Truly, achieving the greatest goals, requires some sort of sacrifice or suffering. Imagine the amount of training it requires to become Michael Phelps or Roger Federer, for instance. Talent was gifted to them, yet a great deal of work and suffering when into their achievements. How we view our suffering is everything.
Is the glass half full or half empty?
Perspective is so important.
Is there something in your life causing you pain or suffering?
How about changing the perspective on this, seeing it in a new light.
Start by REFRAMING what it means to you.
What is the value you’ve placed on it before?
Can you adjust that value?
Start slowly, and keep shifting day by day. In a week, let me know what has happened.
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Photo Credits: Via Flickr and Courtesy of MIRAMAX
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David G. Arenson ND, Australia’s Leading Soul-Coach – Spiritual Teacher, Energy Healer;
and Celebrity Therapist.