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What’s causing you the most suffering in life isn’t the things you don’t have or not being grateful for the things you do. The reason why most of us endure so much unnecessary pain is that we believe in the picture painted by another artist’s brush. To put it simply, understanding why you’re in grief right now, could be due to these two reasons:

1) You believe that you’re not living the life that you’re supposed to have.

2) You know this because you compare yourself to other people your age and just don’t measure up.

“People suffer when they pursue a life or chase a dream that doesn’t belong to them.” – Carolyn Myss, Anatomy of the Spirit

A lot of times we get caught up in somebody else’s light and in doing so get lost in our own shadows. I think people who read blogs, listen to webinars or read biographies get swept up in the success of others. We’re drawn to it like a moth is drawn to a flame. At first, we’re attracted because we want so much to be that successful. And hope that by spending as much time with these people, we will catch some of their star power and be like them.

The truth is we never know the real story of a person’s life. We don’t know their ups and downs, their hardships, their challenges. It is their story and we were never meant to live it ourselves. All we have is a snapshot into someone else’s life for a brief period. Yes your former co-worker on LinkedIn just got promoted or your Facebook friend just posted an envious update. But we all have bad days. How many people would offer to share that?

If you really want to be happy, you need to re-shift your focus. Stop zooming in on other people’s lives. Stop berating yourself for what you didn’t do or don’t have. The only way you will fulfill your purpose is to stop comparing yourself and focus on your life.

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