I was an inquisitive child who asked a ton of questions, and in adulthood, my mother told me that my sister never had to ask because I did it first. Many of them were about sex and most were at the dinner table. According to my dad, he would blush and say to my mom, […]
Today as I was facilitating a recovery group at my ‘day job’ as an addictions counselor and going around the circle as people were checking in and sharing how things had been for them since our last meeting, one of the men said “Life was pretty lifey this week.” Knowing laughter ensued, since everyone there had experienced what he was talking about. I call it “life stuff happening.” For me this week, it was job, laundry, coaching clients, recording session and prep for my soon to be launching radio show, gym time, relationships, bills to pay, snow to shovel, grocery shopping to do, phone calls to return, workshops to plan and promote, articles to write, a class to teach yesterday and another workshop this coming Saturday, emails to answer and then add to that, car repairs, heater challenges in the midsts of the coldest days this winter AND my sister’s health crisis (she had a heart attack on Saturday that thank God, she survived and from which she is recovering) all added up to life getting pretty lifey around here too. So, what’s a type A (allegedly recovering), get- it- done, functionally manic, Wonder Woman aspirant to do? Honor where she is in the process at any given moment. I had come home from teaching a class on co-dependence for a group of Social Workers, feeling both accomplished and spent. I felt I had given it all I had, wrung myself out like a sponge, was in creative flow and ready for a nap. I didn’t even go to the gym as I had planned, wanting nothing more on that drizzly night, than to curl up under the blankies. And so I did.
How rarely do you honor your need for self care? I was speaking with someone recently about the difference between being selfish and offering good self care. My idea is that someone who is selfish feels that he or she is only one whose needs are to be met and that a sense of entitlement goes along with it. Someone who provides self care does so, not only for their own benefit, but when that occurs, they are better able to be of service to others. It is an infinity symbol, a interwoven tapestry, an endless loop tape.
I was reminded of the man on the Ed Sullivan Show who was adept at spinning plates. Erich Brenn’s gift still dazzles me when I watch it on You Tube. There are times when my life looks just like that as I get one aspect twirling and then move rapidly to the next thing on my list, keeping a watchful eye on the most recent symbolic plate. It can get exhausting. I envy people who either have fewer objects in the air or who are more talented than I am at keeping them in motion without dropping or at least breaking them. Maybe they have paper plates or Corel dishes.
What do you when life gets lifey?
http://youtu.be/Zhoos1oY404 Erich Brenn – Ed Sullivan Show