Should I Stay Or Should I Go? The Gemini Guide To Compatibility

Welcome back to the exciting final round of “Should I Stay, Or Should I Go?”

Today’s contestant, Gemini, is on the verge of walking away with the Grand Prize… true love! Now Gemini, all you have to do is answer one question correctly. The cash value of the question reflects the degree of difficulty involved. Naturally, you might want to pick an easier Sign… but playing it safe all the time didn’t get you as far as it has.

LIBRA (\$200): If someone wants to go the same direction you want to go, but you’re always going in two different directions at once, can they keep up?

AQUARIUS (\$200): There’s no question that you can be cool and dispassionate when you want to, knowing your partner will appreciate the affection when it comes later. But what if your partner has a chill schedule of his/her own?

ARIES (\$400): If a train leaves Chicago traveling east at 50 miles per hours, and you want to go west, are you going to end up under this train instead of on it?

LEO (\$400): If fun and passionate meet materialistic and possessive in a dark back alley, who will win the knife fight? And are you the darkened back alley?

SAGITTARIUS (\$400): If two freedom fighters team up, and one of them changes flags every other day, how long until the two freedom fighters end up shooting each other, even by accident?

GEMINI (\$600): If two people manage to travel in four directions at once, will either of them end up getting anywhere together, or everywhere?

VIRGO (\$600): Emotionally, is X greater than Y, if Y equals Virgo? Solve for X. Having fun yet? Didn’t think so. It’s supposed to be a romance, not a math problem.

TAURUS (\$800): If slow and steady wins the race, will you get tired of the prize and want to take up poker before you get to the finish line if you’re riding a Bull?

CAPRICORN (\$800): If a hot air balloon has a relative weight of -50 pounds, how many boulders will a Capricorn pile on to ground it until the balloon turns into just an empty bag that doesn’t fly?

CANCER (\$800): Which lasts longer: Cancer’s ability to dive deep into the dark waters of over-emotionality, or your ability to hold your breath while they drag you down with them?

SCORPIO (\$1000): How many times per day do you need to be told to mentally and verbally “get to the point” before you trade in your honeymoon tickets to Hawaii for a bus ticket to Anywhere But Here?

PISCES (\$1000): (Two part question) 1) A bird may love a fish, but where would they live? 2) How long will it take two birds to either eat two fish, or drown?

Go ahead, Gemini… pick a Grand Prize question. Or. if you prefer, just spin the wheel. That approach seems to work for you too…