Lessons from a Recovering Doormat

Lessons from a Recovering Doormat


Retail Therapy = Emotional Shopping

purseRetail Therapy has become a popular term lately. It’s often said in a joking way that someone is going for retail therapy because they have a problem. But, shopping to make yourself feel better usually doesn’t make you feel better beyond the moments of a purchase, especially when the bills come. Only working on yourself and resolving what’s wrong or your feelings about something that hurt you can bring you real peace and joy.

Shopping can take your mind off of a problem or hurt but doesn’t make it go away.

Our society encourages people to turn to material things to find happiness, but that’s not where it comes from. People use retail therapy to soothe a variety of wounds, fears and inadequacies. You may be feeling down, had a romantic break up, made a mistake at work that was embarrassing, or some other negative feeling or experience. Loneliness is also a common reason people shop. But shopping is a very short-lived fix when you feel out of control in other areas of your life or you need a pick-me-up.

You might head for a shopping center or your favorite online shopping sites to find some relief. But no matter how much you buy, the problems that drove you to shop don’t go away with purchases. I’ve worked with people who ran up huge credit card bills in an effort to soothe themselves. They sadly admitted to emotional shopping for things they hadn’t even taken out of the bag yet. Emotional shopping is often impulsive. You may not need what you buy so it just sits in a closet as you pay the bills.

Retail Therapy makes you buy things you don’t need and may not be able to afford easily, all in an effort to heal emotions that don’t feel good.

But this kind of therapy isn’t very effective. If you get an urge to shop when you’re upset, call a friend first. Talk it out. Go to a real therapist if this becomes a pattern. You have to deal with what’s making you need to buy things in order to feel better! Purchases are like Band Aids that fall off quickly and leave the wound as raw as when you put it on. Leave shopping for when you’re in a good mood and actually need stuff. Love yourself enough to work on what’s bothering you so the negative emotions can leave for good!
***************

Join the Self-Love Movement™! Take the 31 Days of Self-Love Commitment and get my book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count the Ways for free at http://howdoiloveme.com. Read my 2013 31 Days of Self-Love Posts HERE. Join the Self-Love Movement™! on Facebook.

Please leave comments under my posts so we can stay connected.



Previous Posts

Shutting Yakkers Up Nicely
Have you ever just wanted to be left alone but someone intruded on your space? When I was a DoorMat and someone talked my ear off when I wanted silence I’d just smile and let them go on and on. I’d get mad inside and feel frustrated at my inability to say what I was feeling—SHUT UP! I’d g

posted 12:01:09pm Apr. 18, 2014 | read full post »

A Wake Up Call
Can you easily recognize when it’s time to make changes in your life?  I’m thrilled to have Dr. Dain Heer as my guest today to give you suggestions for waking your consciousness. He travels all over the world facilitating advanced classes, workshops and seminars on Access Consciousness® and a

posted 12:01:58pm Apr. 17, 2014 | read full post »

Law of Attraction in Action: Assuming the Worst
This is post 280 in my series on the Law of Attraction in Action. You CAN use your power to manifest your desires.. I do it every day! Read all the posts in my Law of Attraction in Action Series to see how. When you’re going through a problem it’s easy to get worked up in a negative direction

posted 12:01:25pm Apr. 15, 2014 | read full post »

Can’t vs. Don’t Want To
We often use words incorrectly. You may say one thing and mean another, without even realizing it. Often it’s done unconsciously. But it’s important to be aware of excuses you make for not

posted 12:01:08pm Apr. 14, 2014 | read full post »

Are You a Needy People Magnet?
Do you find yourself surrounded by people who need you for something? Do you tend to end up with romantic partners who need fixing? It’s common, especially for DoorMats who have people pleasing as part of their M.O.  I did when I was a DoorMat. These needy folks would bring me down with their dem

posted 12:01:49pm Apr. 11, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.