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Jesus Creed

Chores around the Home

Well, here we sit after 35+ years of marriage. 

Kris somehow naturally internalized all her chores and internalized them immediately. I didn’t and I haven’t but I’ve gradually gotten myself attached to a number of them — like mowing the grass and digging holes for flowers and swiffing our hardwood floors and cooking dinner. I do the laundry, but sometimes forget to dry the clothes — I need something (or someone) to remind me. Kris seems to know — an internalizer — when to dust and clean some rooms and she never forgets to dry the clothes when she’s doing the laundry.

Still, I have one chore left un-internalized — taking out the garbage — and though we have lived here 23+ years I still can’t remember the day the garbage goes to the street. 

Any suggestions?

How about you: Are any chores hard for you to internalize?
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Mike M

posted November 14, 2009 at 11:59 am

Can you take out the garbage the night before? Do you have some type of internet calendar that can remind you? Being prompted often enough leads to internalization. For example, I have Yahoo! Calendar and I can set an event with weekly reminders. The reminders will be sent to my email but I can also request that they be sent to my cellphone.

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posted November 14, 2009 at 12:26 pm

Who needs internalization?
You have an iPhone
The iPhone has a Calendar
The calendar has an alarm
Need more be said
Perhaps there is an even better app – I’d check the store

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posted November 14, 2009 at 2:04 pm

BINGO! The key of course is to be willing to DROP EVERYTHING the second the alarm goes off and do it. My expereince tells me a couple of snoozes…and it never gets done. Then, that particular alarm becomes meaningless. You instead “internalize” ignoring the alarm.

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posted November 14, 2009 at 2:40 pm

I personally don’t think any of these things are necessary, though they are good ideas. If you’re willing to let Kris rmind you, and if she’s willing to do it, that should do the trick. Seems to make for a healthy marriage, in my book. She hears you admit a need, you trust her reminders are not nagging. You can both laugh about it. (Right…?)

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posted November 14, 2009 at 2:41 pm

Oh, my goodness! I typo’d my own name!

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Mike M

posted November 14, 2009 at 4:53 pm

Lidna: I think Dr. McKnight is a big boy now and should internalize it himself!
Dan: with reminders from Yahoo! Calendar, you can set when to get the reminders. This is why I asked if the garbage could go out the night before. If so, set a reminder for a time after supper and then again before going to work the next day.

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Dave Leigh

posted November 14, 2009 at 5:12 pm

You could look out your window. If your neighbors cans are out, yours need to follow. That’s what I do. 😉

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Richard W. Wilson

posted November 15, 2009 at 2:53 am

Oh, I love this. I’m an undiagnosed HAADD (hyper active, attention deficit disordered) kind of guy, and forgetting to do something while getting caught up in whatever I happen to be doing and forgetting the time or whatever I was supposed to be doing is a frequent phenomena in my experience and that of my family. Oh, my, talk about opportunities for humble pie and others exercising their responsibility to be forgiving (Jesus did say it was required if you were going to be forgiven!); there have been too many, and I keep trying! We all have our “weaknesses” and inadequacies (get over it all you “more perfect than me” people!). What day is it anyway? Oh, you have something against me? Well, I better hope I’ve got time to get together with you before I go bring my offering to God and beg your forgiveness, hadn’t I? Oh, I’ve been cooking more recently myself, but I never seem to get it done by the 6 pm target established by my wife’s very functional internal clock; oh, well! Thankfully, the laundry and lawn mowing don’t have to be done to a time schedule (except that the neighbors would like to see a mowed lawn when their friends and in-laws come down our street on the weekend). I do my best, but please, cut us space cases some slack.
All the best in Christ our forgiving and accommodating Lord and Savior.
Richard W. Wilson

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posted November 15, 2009 at 8:21 am

If you are sometimes “forgetting to put the clothes in the dryer,” then you may not actually be “doing the laundry.” I used to think the laundry was “finished” when I took them out of the dryer and laid the clean clothes on the sofa. Then I started wondering why I was upset that my clean clothes were never in my dresser or my closet and were always on the sofa. Eventually, it occurred to me that if I wanted clean clothes in my dresser and my closet, I shouldn’t consider the job of laundry finished until they were folded/hung up and put away.
So, is it possible you think “doing the laundry” ends at the “put the clothes in the dryer” step?

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posted November 15, 2009 at 11:10 pm

Kenton, you’re really onto something significant. I have this problem finishing things. I have to break tasks down somewhat to even get started, and one of the mileposts becomes the destination in my mind. I have to really concentrate on making sure I include enough time to do a task in its entirety, and discipline myself to not get in a hurry and take a shortcut towards the end.

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