Beyond Blue

Beyond Blue

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder + Fish = Disaster

goldfish.jpgHere’s an entry from my archives that you’ll appreciate. Maybe. If you have a sense of humor. And are a tad OCDish like me.
The most challenging part of my sprint triathlon last weekend had nothing to do with physical endurance, although I did feel like I was going to fall off my heavy mountain bike loaded with Gatorade several times as I headed into the wind.
For a person with OCD issues, the real test of strength was all in the head.
I am what you call a pool snob. The community aquatic center is not clean enough for me. In fact, sterilized conditions are so important to this swimmer that I sought employment at the U.S. Naval Academy so I could use their pristine, Olympic-size pool. Needless to say, paddling around in this “freshwater” pond the race organizers described had me a tad nervous.
When the two friends and I pulled up to the Lower Shore Family YMCA in Pocomoke City, Maryland, I nearly bailed upon spotting a brown puddle of water that looked no deeper than my bath.
“That pond out there in the front, is that what we’re swimming in?” I asked the guy who gave me my race packet, feeling exactly like Clark W. Griswold (Chevy Chase) when he arrives at a closed Walley World theme park after driving across the country in National Lampoon’s “Vacation.”


“Ha! No, it’s in the back.”
Phew. That one would allow me to at least get horizontal without hurting my knees. But it still wasn’t close to passing my contamination inspection.
“Focus,” I told myself. “Focus on the swim, not on how disgusting this water is.”
But when my head was fully submerged in the muddy pond a minute after the go signal, I spotted a school of small fish swimming under me.
“They are only fish,” I said to myself. “You are bigger than they are. Do not fear the fish. Keep swimming. Look up occasionally to see where the hell you are going, and keep swimming.”
Then more fish. And these made-for-triathlon spandex shorts I was wearing weren’t tight. There was plenty of room for a fish to sneak in.
Just like Memorial Day twenty years ago. (People with OCD have great memories, unfortunately.)
Our neighborhood pool held its annual Memorial Day goldfish swim, where they dumped dozens of those colorful fellows into the chlorinated water (I’m not sure why they didn’t die), and then kids scooped them up in their plastic bags, and took them home as pets.
I forget how many my twin sister and I scored that year (it was organized according to age groups). All I remember is that when my mom went to give us baths, my sister found a fish in her suit.
“They’re getting stuck in there, I know it!” I panicked.
“Concentrate. Focus. Swim. Do not fear the fish, for crying out loud. Ten more minutes and you’re done. You’ll be on your bike.”
“Oh my God, a big white fish! He’s attacking me!”
“That’s not a fish, you moron, that’s a foot of one of the slower old guys who took off in the wave before you.”
“Oh God, I just got a mouthful of this filthy water! Yuck! What if I swallowed a fish?”
“The fish won’t kill you. Not in your mouth, your stomach, or in your pants. Keep on going. You’re almost there.”
You’d think the paranoia would end as soon as I could exit the sooty pond, but not for an OCDer.
As I sat on my bike seat, I heard a squishing sound.
“I heard the fish. I just squashed it! I knew it!”
“It’s probably the padding in your shorts. Chill out. And even if you managed to catch one, he’ll be dead by the time the ride is over.”
“But I can’t ride 14.2 miles with a dead Nemo in my pants!”
Every time I shifted gears, I thought about Nemo, wondering how he was doing. In fact, no matter how hard I tried to direct my thoughts to something else, preferably the race I was participating in, I continued to freak out about the fish.
Like when I passed a chicken farm, about a half of a mile into the run.
“I smell it! It’s a whole family of fish, reproducing as I run! Nothing short of a fish school drying out could smell that bad!”
I finally crossed the finish line singing the tune from “The Little Mermaid“: “Les poisons, les poisons, how I love les poisons!”
Which was fitting, because considering all the seaweed (but no fish!) that fell off of me in the shower afterward, you’d think I was “The Big Mermaid.”


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  • Peg

    Therese, thanks for making me smile and brightening my day. God bless you.

  • Anonymous

    great story…wonderful that you can laugh at it and take it for wht it is worth…and congrats on completing the race!!

  • Jen

    Therese – Not to insult your issues (everybody has some) but, I often wonder with as many different diagnoses, compulsions, and mentalities as you categorize yourself with, if what you truly have is “psychology student syndrome.” Thanks for keeping everyone informed with the varieties!

  • SuzanneWA

    Therese, your story made me wonder if you and MONK went to the same “school” (pardon the pun), when it comes to obsessing about situations that most people wouldn’t give a darn about! Although I have not been given the diagnosis of OCD, as a bipolar, I have experienced panic attacks for no discernable reason, over little things that normally wouldn’t phase me.
    I’d use familiar terms like “focus” and “concentrate” instead of compulsion when dealing with those nagging worries that happen to the best of us. Although there is no “cure” for OCD or bipolar, we CAN “maintain” through a situation and complete the task ahead of us.
    I think you ARE a “big mermaid” for finishing the race, and giving us all a great laugh at your own expense! Thanx for the chuckle!

  • Mrs. ELois Poole-Clayton

    Congratulations! You have the patients of JOB, for if you didn’t, you would have sanked like Peter, and I commend you for having it. GOD bless you continuously!

  • Rebecca Donovan

    I found this article to be one of the funniest things I’ve read in a long time. I don’t have OCD, but work with people who do. It’s nice to be able to laugh at some of this from a distance, because it’s not fun to work with….

  • Nancy

    I have to commend you for all the different experiences you get yourself through just by finding the laughter in the situation as you push on to complete the task at hand.
    Like yourself, I have to talk myself through many things just to get the job done and can look back later at it and find the humor in it.
    As for Jen’s comments about having “psychology student snydrome” don’t worry about. We all have many varieties of illnesses and many of them overlap…it is just a case of which one cares to manafest at any given time.
    I’ve only been reading your blog the last few months but it does wonders for making me realize I am not alone with my depression, alcoholism, etc.
    God Bless,

  • Valerie

    Therese, I had never read your blog before, but as someone with OCD, I really enjoyed reading this. Your humor with your situation makes me have hope for my own OCD….it’s so hard to cope with, but you give me hope. Thanks for sharing your experiences with us all. God bless you. :-)

  • Karen

    Great story, I really enjoyed it. I don’t have OCD but do have periods of depression but humor even on my darkest days has gotten me through(along with some meds and other things). But I do believe the ability to put a twist on things especailly about the illness that we have is a really great survival skill

  • Hazel, Orlando

    Too funny!! Ditto on all of the comments that I’ve read so far about this article. Being able to laugh (and make others laugh) and share, about your problems (whether psychotic or otherwise) is, perhaps, the greatest therapy anyone can have. As a matter of fact, from reading your article, I think you’re HEALED!! If you truly had OCD, no way could you get in the MUDDY pond and ride with the SMELLY fish. YOU’RE HEALED!!! Keep um keeping. I love to laugh!!

  • Jill

    Therese, As a person with mild OCD that shows up mainly when I’m really stressed, I can truly appreciate your story. For you to come through it and see the humor in all of it was wonderful to read about. Thank you for a truly inspiring, humorous story.

  • Cassandra

    Therese, I wonder if you know how truly generous of spirit you are.
    Thank you for sharing…

  • Donna C. Matthews

    Thanks for sharing! I don’t mind getting dirty, or smelly at all, well, maybe a little; however, I am terrified of my friends and relatives having car accidents. I know everyone is a little anxious about their relatives when they are traveling on the highway, but every night when my son drives home from work, I suffer from anxiety attacks! And every time my Mother drives to the grocery store I am on edge and imagine terrible things happening until she has safely returned.
    I also am terrified of heights, the house burning down, and similar things like that.
    I’ve actually not told anyone this before!
    Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone!

  • Anonymous

    Therese, I laugh out loud at most of your stories, but this one was a classic. I love the way you write! I ran for years but suffered an injury recently, so I’m slowly getting back into it. However, I don’t think I could ever do a triathalon, so you go girl!

  • Victoria

    I USED to be somewhat OCD, until a couple of step children cured me. I guess you could say that I had no choice as I realized how miserable I made them, hubby, and most of all myself! Now that I have become an official “laid back person” my karma has caught up with me…I am now on the RECEIVING END of this treatment (and I thought I’d just be a happily relaxed laid back girl!). I have to say…these people make me truly miserable! Especially my micro managing boss. The sad thing about her is that she really doesn’t see me for who I am, my contributions I make, my happy clients. Nope. She’s far more interested in chasing miniscule petty details that don’t mean squat. I find that that is all OCD people will ever know about me. Not what I’ve done for the environment, my kids, my life. No, they just remember my bad hair days, static cling, and that piece of lint on my lapel. The movie “Because I Said So” covers this hysterically…a must see for OCD people and their victims.

  • lady of light

    Teresa – you are a true overcomer and I love your sense of humor. It is so good when we can learn to laugh at ourselves. Your commitment to “Focus” (keep swimming) is a great contribution for those of us who do get sidetracked by other issues in the journey of life. I truly enjoyed your story.

  • judy

    Your story was funny! Since I have OCD and I don’t have a mild case, I deal with the things that I’m fearful of sometimes good and sometimes not so good. It’s tough!! But I feel like I’ve accomplished alot. Thanks.

  • Robin Hummingbird Songs

    This story had me laughing so hard I sent it to several friends, laughing with you though, not at you.

  • Karen M. Harvey

    I always enjoy your columns. They make me smile and help to put being human into perspective.

  • Anonymous

    What is OCD

  • Sonya

    I would just like to say that this story was great… Great Inspiration, and A Great Big Smile! Thank You so much for sharing. I believe I do have some undiagnosed issues and this gives me the Hope I need at times to make it through some of the things that often stand in my way, along my designated path. Thank You!! May God Bless You ALWAYS and in EVERYTHING!

  • lauri

    Hi there, Last night as my 11 yr old son is playing before bed he was going threw his back steps Imsure you know those,I told him ok sweetie letyourself know its ok to leave it be all is good, as im laying there trying to go to sleep thinking pls God give him peace, I awke and find the email with your story in it this morn :) I am going to save this for him for a later date,In thinkit’s important for people toknow there are others (normal great people0 whogothrewthe ocd moments, andIm notpositive but I really believe that it happens to peoplewhoare very caring sensitive seems to hit them harder ya know ? well Blessings and thanks for the story :0

  • Bev. :)

    Absolutely loved your commentary on the experience with your triatholon and “friend”, OCD. I could definately relate to it…I was diagnosed with panic disorder about 7 years ago at age 40. Wow…I would have never guessed that something like that would occur in my life. I have also found that my greatest ally is a sense of humor and to be able to look at many of the challenges through the lens of comedy!
    Because I traveled many years of my life without the difficulty, at the onset, I remember feeling, “Where did I go?” I was an athlete, quite a “dare-devil”, a college coach, and an associate professor. Many probably considered me to be incredibly self-sufficient and courageous. Within a fairly short period of time…it took all the courage that I could “muster” to walk out of my apartment.
    I now tend to see how it’s all been a bit of a blessing. It’s much easier to come from the perspective of compassion, patience, and kindness. It’s also become a necessity to strengthen that muscle of good humor!!
    I just feel so happy for you that you are also able to do the same. Sometimes the little things can make life just a bit easier! As you can see by the responses, people find your writing and humor to be so entertaining :). As for “psychology student syndrome”…well, as I’m sure you know…it can be very difficult for people to understand if they have not experienced such a thing. Ten years ago, I might have said the same thing…I kind of just thought that people needed to “buck up”. So…panic disorder was exactly what I may have needed in order to bring me more into the human realm and off my pedestal!! ha!
    Finally, I do sometimes wonder if the true disorder these days is to live without anxiety!! This world is spinning awfully fast…seems more natural and “normal” for a human to have some difficulties with it all!
    Thanks so much for sharing…
    Peace and Blessings,
    Bev. :)

  • Katie

    That is a wonderful story, I am glad you are able to laugh at this and share your stories with others. Good Luck in future races.



  • Cathy

    I read this story and said “oh my goodness, that’s me”
    I was diagnosed with OCD/anxiety disorder. And that’s pretty much what it can sound like in my head (on a good day).
    The best thing I ever did was to get into therapy. Harder work than taking drugs, but it’s doable-I don’t have panic attacks. People now see me as laid back and calm, if they only knew how much work it took to get there.
    Thanks for sharing.

  • Eric C. Hernandez

    I thought your letter was funny and it had me kinda trippin’ on the way you reacted to the fish in the pond. I used to have a case of OCD when I was in a recovery place. It was a compulsion to take cold showers like for an hour straight 3 times a day or even in one night!
    Half of OCD is delusions. I thinki the idea of taking the cold showers were a mixture of stress and delusional thinking. I knew I was keeping myself clean moreso in the spiritual sense than the physical sense. It is like a comfort issue too. Once I was out of the cold shower I had either come to my senses in some way shape or form, plus it felt good to get in a warm bed and I could sleep better.
    You had me going even though I never was diagnosed as OCD.

  • Judy

    My favorite line is “But I can’t ride 14.2 miles with a dead Nemo in my pants!”
    Thank you so much for the humorous look at OCD!

  • dan

    I just read this part from your book, Therese, and I’m amazed at how much you know about me! I haven’t finished “Beyond Blue” yet, but so far I’ve seen myself in every chapter, almost every paragraph.
    I’m hoping that at some point I’ll know what it’s like to be happy. It’s hard to see right now.
    Thanks for writing “Beyond Blue”.

  • Bob

    Read the story and have to admit it was a hoot – however what took away from the story was how many times you wrote ‘oh my G–‘.
    This blog is on Beliefnet which is supposed to have some spiritual aspect to it; but relying on injecting God name so frivolously breaks the Third Commandment which states:
    “You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.”
    Whether or not you take issue with me immaterial and besides the point. What matters is that it was God Himself who has the perfection and the right as our Creator to make this an important point.
    So anyone here can flame me all they want, I really don’t care, but this is an important point otherwise God wouldn’t have made that a Command instead of a talking point or a suggestion.

  • Mary

    I just love your story; it is so funny but also familiar! After I had my baby I had OCD for about 10 years. I remember trying to think logical things to control something that is not logical, just like you. Now I still feel like this when I have a low point, but not so much usually. I wish the best for you, Therese. Keep exercising while you can! I am extremely disabled and can’t do much exercise. I’m sure I would feel better if I could. I used to be so active and was outside almost all day. I really miss it.

  • Rita

    Great self talk there!
    Personally I only swim in places that have “sides”. No lakes or ponds for me.

  • Sue

    I loved this! It puts my “stuff” in perspective. I love how revelatory you are about your inner processes.
    And don’t mind people like Bob–“God” isn’t the NAME of God, and normal Christians don’t think of “Oh my God” as taking the Lord’s name in vain!

  • Danno

    A couple of points:
    1) Bob – gotta say I am in 100% agreement with you, and I applaud you standing up for our Christian beliefs.
    I went back and read the article. As you stated how often God’s name was irreverently spoken, I found it was only twice. What that told me was, that by her using that phrase (which we teach our kids NOT to say), greatly distracted from what she was trying to say in the article. Especially on THIS website. It takes away certain credibility from the author’s heading “A Spiritual Journey To Mental Health.”
    2) Sue – I noticed you capitalized the name “God” in your comment regarding Bob. I assume because you believe that HE is the one TRUE God. Yes, he may go by other names too, but HE is STILL GOD! AND . . . I am one normal Christian . . . that believes . . . that saying “Oh my G**” – IS TAKING OUR LORD GOD’s NAME IN VAIN!!!
    BUT – even if that is said . . . we can still ask forgiveness through His Son, Jesus Christ, who will cast our sin as far as the east is from the west. If we ask Christ into our heart, to be Lord and Saviour, He will forgive us, and give us eternal life. We will not be perfect or sinless, just forgiven, and covered in the blood and grace of Jesus Christ.

  • Bob

    Sue – you don’t have the authority to summarily dismiss, excuse, overlook and disregard the Third Commandment. Whatever your version of a ‘normal’ Christian is or is not is only your opinion and completely irrelevant.
    Who are you to decide that our Creator God didn’t really mean what He says, and says what He means? The Ten Commandments are twice found in the Bible – so the second time it’s referred to is a reiteration that He is in charge and makes the rules. Not you nor I. We are to love and obey Him in all things, not sit there and justify ones sins. (Jer.17:9 and Rom. 8:10). If you justify your sins, and think it a small thing to dismiss one of His Commandments, you put Christ to shame because He died for our sins and what you say is that no-one needs a Savior because God didn’t mean what He said!
    What you need to do is some serious self-examination because I assure you real Christians don’t have a habit of taking God’s name in a frivolous manner. What you need to realize is that in your mind, you just said that think God’s opinion doesn’t count. What counts is your own opinion. You actually raised yourself above God and that too is a sin.
    Our sins can only be forgiven when we acknowledge them and repent of doing them. This is why Christ said ‘Repent ye and be baptized…’
    Any sins that are not acknowledged by you on your knees in front of God’s throne is unpardonable sin: it’s unpardonable because you don’t seek pardon!
    Don’t be so quick to figuratively wave your hand around and tell people not to mind me – you are teaching others, giving others permission to sin, and that too is serious business! If others don’t care about sinning and, in this instance, breaking the Third Commandment then they cannot be real Christians because we are admonished to consider every word we say, and to walk in Christ’s footsteps. So not only will we be judged by our actions, but we’ll be judged by every idle word… and taking God’s name in a frivolous manner is not a ‘small thing’. You do not have *any* Scriptural authority that proves God didn’t mean what He said about His Holy, sacred Name!
    Once you begin to compromise on Scriptural teachings, laws, commandments, statutes, judgements and proper Holy Days, it will be that much easier to keep compromising… as you have shown to have done.
    Why do I bother mentioning any of this? Simple. We are taught in both the Old Testament that we all have a responsibility in that if we see someone sinning – and we fail to warn them they are sinning – that that person’s sins will be on our heads. If we do warn the sinner of his sin, and the sinner repents of his sins, our sins will be forgiven because love covers a multitude of sins. But – if that person warns the sinner, and the sinner continues to sin, then that person’s sins will be on the sinner only and the one who did the warning will be justified. You can find all this in Ezekiel.
    So as I mentioned in my first post, I don’t particularly care what you (or anyone) thinks of me. I’m not out to win a popularity contest. What is important to me however is to walk in the path that Jesus walked remembering that the Scripture is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.

  • Robert (Bob)

    OCD is a common choice among the Neurotic Symptoms available and I wonder, seriously — because people ‘enjoying’ this OCD humour (as i do in addition to my comment) may suffer from the ‘media-related’ encouragement to continue CHOOSING OCD as their ‘favourite’ technique of distraction, that is, distraction from their real problems… RCTN, The Rational-CHoice Theory of Neurosis, has made me realize how much and how often I actively CHOOSE OCD or other symptoms in order to become pre-occupied with content unrelated to my current-stressors.
    RCTN’s Rational Insight Therapy helps the patient ‘weed through’ the distraction-content of the mind and focuses on strengthening the COPING MECHANISMS, which when weak will allow the person to ‘opt out’ for the “symptom-solution” (like slipping into a favourite OCD repertoire…). I enjoy these blogs, because it is a ‘happy’ way of reading about what i’m interested in, but i know the momentary ‘lift’ may be reinforcing the ‘availability’ and ‘social acceptance’ of choosing the “OCD symptom solution.” I’m open to discussion!! thank you all for sharing!!

  • OCD Survivor

    Bob- You are really insane and misguided. I had to laugh. OCD is a devastating mental illness that I’ve known all to well for most of my life. Just because we, OCD sufferers/survivors, sometimes take humor in our symptoms doesn’t mean we choose to have it or wouldn’t go through months of intensive therapy to give it up. That’s like saying, “joking about cancer, means that the person WANTED cancer.” No, it’s just a way making light of a difficult situation.
    I also wanted to remind the author and readers that not everyone with OCD has issues with contamination! However the possibility fish in my pants would make me freak out too. I am glad that you faced your fears.

  • Robert (Bob)

    sorry O-S, i think i ought to have phrased it all differently, because I am worried about how accurate RCTN is and how eefective the Rational Insight Therapy can be. I know from trying to wean myself from certain OCD stints that i often – literally – choose to ‘go under’ rather than choose to stick it out and resist. It all sounds good that my COPING MECHANISMS need to be strengthened and that this type of therapy concentrates on what is essential for living, rather than allowing me to flounder in the sea of dreams, desires, fantasies and childhood memories and so on. Also I am encouraged to NOT feel the comfort of the therapeutic relationship. I’m new to blog/comment dialogue, but does the author ever help us out with responses? or articles on the topic? i’ve been tackling RCTN for two years now and the most recent article is here:Journal of Psychotherapy Integration © 2010 American Psychological Association 2010, Vol. 20, No. 2, 152–202. I would appreciate all your help and sorry O-S, well, at least you laughed…wishing you and all well!

  • Your NameRowena Philbeck

    That is a great story. I can relate to some things I have done but that was really funny. I can imagine..Nemo in your pants.. Thanks..great story.

  • Melody

    Has anyone ever thought about just giving it to God? And if you truly give it to God, why worry? If you still worry, you’ve not given it ALL to God. Sometimes, I think humans make things harder than it has to be.

  • Jersey Broad

    As a polytheist, I often say “Oh, my Gods!”, which seems to offend as many as using the singular form of deity.
    Bob, you seem to be obsessing about something that most other people would not even have noticed. Your concern is duly noted; however, please note that not everyone believes as you do. While you have the right to believe as you like, and to be offended when others don’t act as you believe God wants them to, you do not have the right to dictate how others view God, or Gods, or how they act or speak in regards to said God or Gods. Would you like others to tell you whenever you are “sinning” according to their beliefs? Yes, this is on Beliefnet, but please remember that Beliefnet is not a Christian-only site.
    Besides, you’d probably find more objectionable material in the Beliefnet Jokes than you do in most of the blogs on here.

  • Your Name

    Bless you Bob, for your bravery in going into that pool of dirty water. I do not have OCD, but I would have been leary of the water. Not leary of the fish, however. When I was a little girl we used to drag a net, with each of us holding a pole at each end, and do what was called “seining” then, and catch a bunch of little fish…Sunfish were the most beautiful, among all the little tadpoles. We then played with the fish in our hands. Holding the Sunnies, we would admire their beauty, talk to them, and then release them back into the river. No,not crazy, just love nature an all its little beings…I lived to be almost 80, now, dispite holding all those little fishies and swimming in a sometimes-muddy river, that we loved! Bird River is a small secondary tributary off the great Chesapeak Bay. Bob, may you keep on swimming…and be blest everytime you undertake another difficult task. Blessings…margaret lee,…might help you overcome OCD.

  • Crystal

    Thanks for posting this story. Even though I’m sure it is no fun having OCD this story was entertaining and made me laugh. I do have a sense of humor. I have a brother-in-law with OCD and I know it is very hard on him but he has a sense of humor also so I’m going to send this story to him. I think he and his wife will appreciate it. Keep posting good things and God bless you.

  • Diane

    Melody – Why are you judging the situation? The old addage says that until you have walked in someone else’s shoes you do not really know what they are going through. Part of Bob’s OCD is dealing with cleanliness and touching. I went scuba diving in the Bahamas 20 years ago and had the same issues with salt water (no salt water in Tennessee) and touching fish. In August, I wore bluejeans and a long sleeved shirt. Bob found himself in a situation and faced his fears. Given his “oh my God” statements, he did find himself trusting God to deliver him through this trial. Where did those thoughts come from? Focus on the swim and not the water. I am bigger than the fish. If I swallow a fish I will not die. I just sat on a fish. He prayed a lot of prayers and God was telling him how to react. When dealing with OCD these are not just fears, they are more extreme than that. Bob did depend on God to get him past that. Bob would not have been able to do what he did without God. I am guessing you do not have the same issues Bob. How would you deal with swimming in a muddy pond, fish all around you and then sitting on one that found its way into your shorts and not being able to remove it until the race was over. “Normal” people have their issues too.

  • anna

    Humorous story weve all been there one time or another, Please pray for my marriage we are separated and Jeff has gone and filed for divorce out of anger and hurt. I asked and pleaded with him to stop it but he wont. So I have no choice to hire a lawyer and respond back to him I talked to him yesterday and he wouldnt budge, said everything was my fault etc, etc, I asked him to give us one more chance to make our marriage work, He said we could go on thru with it and date one another or that he could stop it anytime, He said if I had changed I would show it in the next few months on the divorce papers that I wouldnt ask him for the $8,000 he owes me back. He said I spent too much time with my grandsons and kids and wasnt home enought, I told him I would change that and I promised for him to just give us a 6 month trial, He is acting so cold and probably has his mind made up, Please pray for restoratin of my mariage to jeff, My name is anna, Thank you and God bless each and every one of you, I will be praying for you,

  • melissa

    i really appreciate these comments made by others they have inspired me to just believe God and HIS Word concerning me. my hope has been revived thank-you all so very much.

  • Olga

    Personnally I believe he did give it to God, without God I don’t think he would have been able to get through those troubling times, I commend you for doing what you did on your swin, run, and bike ride, I truly thank you for posting your story, I needed a good smile today, so again thank you and thanks be to God for getting all of us through our hard times…..God Bless Everyone…and may you all have a Blessed Day.

  • Olga

    Anna I will definitely say a praying for you and your husband I will pray the Lord help to open your husbands eyes and provide him with the knowledge he needs to help in making your marriage work….God Bless you Anna

  • george

    listen my load is heavy my heart has sunk the ones whom supposedly love me treat me like a punk, all they ask for is the support that i give , for the fundage is low for all of my kids , the ex’s dont seem to care about me , for one little argument and they hurry to flee. they use my generosity and good will to no end, but when i need them the most they run off once again !! when business has fluttered with no end in sight , they blame me for their changes in their own goddamn plight . they run to the next or what they see as so , because for this damn moment i haven’t much dough.. its sad to say but the shallow ones go for all i want is the fish that will flow , flow thru the waters of the highs and the lows for this my friend is where i want to go. i ask u dear jesus to help with a tow for i know that this is my all time LOW.. forgive me for cursing and letting it show but my feelings are hurt like you’ll never know.. give me strenghth dear lord , for i want to go down the yellow brick road that i wish u will lead me till its time to go … geo k b

  • William Shan Abel

    Amen to the other previuos comments.

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    Hello, my name is Gary, I’m 57, soon to be 58 Aug. 24th. I have been OCD ever sinse I can remember, almost. I’ve tried a psychiatrist, and all the antidepressent medication’s available to no avail. I’ve tried praying, crying out ot God, begging for relief from my fears, phobia’s, an anxieties. Some times I get a little relief, but not for long, It seems as if God wants me to go through these things to teach me some kind of lesson, like walk by faith and not by sight, or fear not for I am with you, even unto the ends of the earth. I think it would be easier if I were blind so I wouldn’t see the things I’m fearful of. Bible scripture is easier said than done. I want to believe, I desire to believe, and I know faith comes from hearing, and hearing from the word of God, but I think faith would be easier if God would just answer my prayers, and let me know that it was him that did so.
    Needless to say I’ve tried everything I can think of to rid myself of this OCD. I have fear of contaminents, and virus’s. I think it comes from something that happened to me, or said to me, that caused my mind to become warped. If there is some where I can go for help, or some one I could see, or if there is some reading material I could obtain, I would appreciate the direction to these helps. this bothers me so much, I’m having trouble typeing, because I’m crying as I type. I would dearly love to be fearless, if nothing but to please God. Thank You, and God bless You.

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    The individual with Obsessive-Compulsive Personality disorder often becomes upset when control is lost. The individual then either emotionally withdraws from these situations, or becomes very angry. The individual usually expresses affection in a highly controlled or stilted fashion and may be very uncomfortable in the presence of others who are emotionally expressive. The person often has difficulty expressing tender feelings, and rarely pays compliments.
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