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Beyond Blue

Beyond Blue

February 2007 Archives

When Is A Lie An Act of Love?

posted by Beyond Blue

Experiments have found that ordinary people tell about two lies every ten minutes. I don’t see how that’s possible, as I’ve been alone the last hour writing this piece (oh dear, am I making it up as I go along?). […]

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Rush to Judgment

posted by Beyond Blue

I couldn’t make a racist statement to get out of jury duty. It’s just not me. And my letter failed–the one explaining that I might not be an ideal candidate, given my psychiatric history in the last year. So there […]

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Craig and Britney

posted by Beyond Blue

I had just finished my article about my three biggest fears in raising a daughter today–Britney, Paris, and Lindsey–when I checked out the brilliant monologue by Craig Ferguson on YouTube. He says something like this, for all of you who […]

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Reader Response: Where Do You Draw the Line?

posted by Beyond Blue

We’ve had some fantastic dialogue on the comments boards of “Mind Over Broken Leg?” “He Had It Coming,” and “Hardly a Secret.” I’ve so enjoyed reading them because I struggle with where to draw the line regarding the power of […]

Are Coincidences Mini-Miracles?

posted by Beyond Blue

While we’re on the topic of spiritual communication, I have wanted to say for some time that nothing pleases me more than to read on the various message boards notes like this: “I stumbled across your post when looking for […]

Sharing a Birthday and More

posted by Beyond Blue

Up until I reached drinking age (three years after I actually quit drinking), I hated sharing my birthday. I figured my twin sister and I got half the cash in our birthday cards as our two older sisters. But now […]

Relax…Have Fun

posted by Beyond Blue

Relax…have fun. It seems like an easy enough way to prevent and relieve depression. But my last two date nights with Eric haven’t gone so well. We spent our Valentine’s Day dinner listening to the couple next to us get […]

When You Know You’re Better

posted by Beyond Blue

The date night before Valentine’s Day was the evening Eric and I almost got shot. Again, in an effort to put our worries and responsibilities aside for a moment and have fun. Psychologists advice against talking about your kids on […]

Party On

posted by Beyond Blue

Celebrations of all kinds–but preferably without druggie gunmen and nasty brides breaking up over chocolate tortes–have been known to fire up neurotransmitters in the brain and protect brain cells in the prefrontal cortex from shrinkage and death. When people sing, […]

Hardly a Secret

posted by Beyond Blue

There’s a big secret out there–“The Secret“–waiting to be discovered by all of us who want a better, easier life. Rhonda Byrne, an Australian filmmaker, has repackaged the ancient philosophy of the “law of attraction” and the power of positive […]

What Ashes Say

posted by Beyond Blue

As an adolescent I loved wearing ashes on my forehead to cover up my oily pimples. In high school, Ash Wednesday got a toast to the beginning of those two-hour Stations of the Cross on Fridays, which shortened each class […]

Be a Nobody

posted by Beyond Blue

For me Lent is about emptying–a glass, a basket, a soul–so that it can be filled up again…with wine (or sparkling cider), peeps (think Easter basket), and hope. The forty days before Easter is one big humbling exercise–where you remind […]

He Had It Coming

posted by Beyond Blue

I’m sure glad my friend Eileen isn’t asked to give many eulogies, because they’d all sound like this: “It’s a bummer he’s gone, but he had it coming to him.” An avid disciple of medical intuitive Caroline Myss, Eileen believes […]

Confessions of a Suicidal Yogi

posted by Beyond Blue

I used to attend a weekly candlelight yoga class. Every Friday evening I would seek courage in warrior pose, stability in tree pose, and peace in lotus pose. And for what seemed like eternity I wondered, “What am I doing […]

Bad Eye Sight

posted by Beyond Blue

Today I recognize how distorted my thinking was back then, and I cringe when I read it. But like an anorexic who thinks more weight loss will make her beautiful, suicidal folks are locked on death as the solution. It’s […]

A Preschool Stress-Out

posted by Beyond Blue

No need to buy a parrot when you have an inquisitive five-year-old boy. “What does ‘stressed out’ mean, Mom?” asked David the other day. “You and Dad say it all the time.” “It means…’tired,’” I answered. “Then I’m stressed out,” […]

Monkey Brains

posted by Beyond Blue

Then again, maybe we shouldn’t blame stress on technology and taxing jobs. Maybe if we weren’t fretting over 350 e-mails in our inbox, then we’d worry about something else because we have primitive, monkey brains. In “The Emotional Brain,” Joseph […]

Talia’s Blog

posted by Beyond Blue

Yeterday I mentioned Talia Mana’s blog, and now I’ll share that she just interviewed me on blogging about depression. Her website, the Centre for Emotional Well-Being, is full of interesting research, commentary, and discussions. She and I have decided to […]

Rewiring the Brain

posted by Beyond Blue

This just in from “Time” magazine: the brain can be rewired. Replacing the dogma that the adult brain is immutable, recent research in neuroscience has discovered the brain’s capacity to change in structure and function according to experience and thoughts. […]

Mind Over Broken Leg?

posted by Beyond Blue

Okay. I get all of it. The scientific evidence that we can, in fact, change our brain with our thoughts. But this very study almost killed me last year. I tried for months and months and more months to stop […]

Mindfulness-Based Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy

posted by Beyond Blue

I want to reiterate that I am a huge supporter of mindful meditation and cognitive-behavioral therapy. It’s just that they alone weren’t able to treat my depression. Here’s a great website on mindfulness-based cognitive-behavioral therapy, an effective blend between mindful […]

Cupid’s Lemonade

posted by Beyond Blue

In order to move beyond their dark days, most depressives master the lesson on how to make lemonade from lemons. For Valentine’s Day, here’s a romantic tale on just that: how a friend of mine turned an embarrassing situation into […]

Back to Reality

posted by Beyond Blue

Granted, most marriages don’t start out (or if they do, they don’t stay for long) in that Disney-type “the universe has aligned now that we’ve met and as long as we’re together there is only sunshine ahead” mentality. Which is […]

A Valentine Nightmare

posted by Beyond Blue

If preschool Valentines are any measure of a mother’s performance (which they are around here), then I’m in much better shape this year than I was the morning of my first Cupid competition. Three years ago, I was a sleep-deprived, […]

How to Read the Paper

posted by Beyond Blue

Learning to read the daily newspaper as a depressive is like learning to feed the ducks in Annapolis without getting crapped on by the seagulls: it demands good timing, a certain strategy, and an obnoxiously wide hat (to shield your […]

A Girdle?

posted by Beyond Blue

This passage from Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet” is where I’m going with this wide hat, container lady, Michelin Man stuff: “You shall be free indeed when your days are not without a care nor your nights without a want and […]

The “Astronut”

posted by Beyond Blue

Sometimes the headlines can work to your advantage. Take the bizarre story about the astronaut love triangle. After reading how Lisa Nowak (a Naval Academy grad) drove cross-country in diapers, I thought to myself, maybe I’m more normal than I […]

An Inconvenient, Depressing Truth

posted by Beyond Blue

I’ve never been so excited to freeze my buns off. Ever since the temperatures dropped into the single digits (with wind chill) a few days ago, I’ve been dancing around the house in my Irish wool sweater singing, “We’re not […]

“Chill Out” Verses

posted by beyond blue

Scripture is full of “chill out,” “hang tight,” “I got ya covered,” and “we’re cool” verses. Among them: Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat, or about your body, what you will wear. […]

Robertson and Global Warming

posted by Beyond Blue

By the way, Pat Robertson says he now believes in global warming.

Reader Response: Beyond Despair

posted by Beyond Blue

My heart bleeds for reader Kate after reading her despondent comments on this post. You say that no one could understand your despair. I have no doubt you feel completely alone in your battle. But I’m pretty sure a few […]

Honey, I Think It’s Time!

posted by Beyond Blue

I wish psychiatrists sent depressives home with instructions on when to go to the hospital similar to the ones obstetricians give to pregnant women once they reach 37 weeks of gestation: when your contractions last for a minute each and […]

Some Symptoms or Signs to Look For

posted by Beyond Blue

Here is what J. Raymond DePaulo Jr., M.D. says about hospitalization in his book, “Understanding Depression“: “The need for hospitalization arises if a person is endangered because he or she is suicidal, or so paranoid or so irritable that he […]

Reader Response: Should He Tell?

posted by Beyond Blue

Thanks to reader Rich for his question about how much to disclose about mental health in a job interview. If he’s going for a position in a psychiatric unit, he asked, is it okay to tell them about the mental […]

Jury Duty

posted by Beyond Blue

Maybe the general public (and especially the U.S. government) isn’t as wigged out by mental illness as I thought. Surely a letter to the Circuit Court for Anne Arundel County stating that I had been hospitalized within the year for […]

Not Just a Fever

posted by Beyond Blue

Two boys went to bed with fevers last night. One is dead. The other is my David. I have to wonder if the guardian angels are vacationing in Florida this month, because too many little guys have fallen asleep for […]

When Crap Befalls Decent Folk

posted by Beyond Blue

Whenever I hear of a story like I did today about the seven-year-old dying in his sleep, I always go back to Harold Kushner’s classic “When Bad Things Happen To Good People.” Now, remind me again, good Rabbi, why does […]

Prayers on the Death of a Child

posted by Beyond Blue

At the Burial of a Child O God, whose beloved Son did take little children into his arms and bless them: Give us grace, we beseech thee, to entrust this child ___ to thy never-failing care and love, and bring […]

Approval Ratings

posted by Beyond Blue

One of the unfortunate things about “coming out” as a depressive is that any enemy in your past can rightfully say, “Aha! See? I knew she was crazy.” I was not well liked at my first job out of school. […]

Previous Posts

Seven Ways to Get Over an Infatuation
“Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered am I” wrote US songwriter Lorenz Hart about the feeling of infatuation. It’s blissful and euphoric, as we all know. But it’s also addicting, messy and blinding. Without careful monitoring, its wild ...

posted 12:46:43pm Feb. 19, 2014 | read full post »

When Faith Turns Neurotic
When does reciting scripture become a symptom of neurosis? Or praying the rosary an unhealthy compulsion? Not until I had the Book of Psalms practically memorized as a young girl did I learn that words and acts of faith can morph into desperate ...

posted 10:37:13am Jan. 14, 2014 | read full post »

How to Handle Negative People
One of my mom’s best pieces of advice: “Hang with the winners.” This holds true in support groups (stick with the people who have the most sobriety), in college (find the peeps with good study habits), and in your workplace (stay away from ...

posted 10:32:10am Jan. 14, 2014 | read full post »

8 Coping Strategies for the Holidays
For people prone to depression and anxiety – i.e. human beings – the holidays invite countless possibility to get sucked into negative and catastrophic thinking. You take the basic stressed-out individual and you increase her to-do list by a ...

posted 9:30:12am Nov. 21, 2013 | read full post »

Can I Say I’m a Son or Daughter of Christ and Suffer From Depression?
In 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, we read: “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” What if we aren’t glad, we aren’t capable of rejoicing, and even prayer ...

posted 10:56:04am Oct. 29, 2013 | read full post »

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