Married for Real: Building a Loving, Powerful Life Together
They might appear to be living a fairy-tale life—he’s a superstar NFL running back and broadcaster; she sings in a successful pop/R&B group. But success on the outside doesn’t always equate to success on the inside—or happiness under the same roof.
BY: Eddie and Tamara George
NFL STAR & WIFE SHARE SECRETS TO A LOVING MARRIAGE
Eddie & Tamara George Share Stories, Faith, to Help Others
Are we relationship experts? No. Do we have degrees in psychology or counseling? No again. But we believe we have something worth saying. We each bring a lifetime of relationship experience to this book and we’ve got 13 years of togetherness that have taught us what it takes to make a relationship work. Could we have benefited from a book like this? Absolutely! That’s one of the big reasons we wanted to do it. We know how important it is to hear from real people who’ve been through good and bad and come out the other end united—and smiling! For whatever reason, most books like this don't get "real." Anyone who knows us knows that we are definitely real.
That's not something we have to work at. It's just who we are. And so we've done our best to bring that to the table. You'll get to see us, warts and all. We’ll talk about real situations and real outcomes. This is life, not fairy tales. But we’re hoping you can learn from everything we’ve been through, that you can sort through the laughter and the tears and pick up some tips you can use to build your own great relationship. We’re going to present six very “doable rules:
-Find and Polish the True YOU
-Put in the TIME
-Live by FAITH -
Handle your MONEY
-Learn the True Art of SEX
Q: You both bring a background of superstar careers to the table: Eddie, as a record-setting NFL running back, and Taj, as a singer in one of the top pop/R&B groups, SWV. What made you decide to write a marriage book together?
A: Well, first off, we are not suddenly experts on relationships! Do we have degrees in psychology or counseling? No again. But we believe we have something worth saying. We each bring a lifetime of relationship experience to this book and we’ve got 13 years of togetherness that have taught us what it takes to make a relationship work. Could we have benefited from a book like this? Absolutely! That’s one of the big reasons we wanted to do it. We know how important it is to hear from real people who’ve been through good and bad and come out the other end united—and smiling! This book grows out of the realities of the life we have shared, by the grace of God, since we found each other. Now, right up front we need to tell you that it wasn't always peaches and cream. In fact, if it had been, this might be a very dull book—and it wouldn’t be very helpful.
Q: So through describing your journey, sharing honest stories about your relationship, you want to give hope that a great relationship is possible, no matter what your baggage or obstacles?
A: Absolutely! One of the things we like about doing this book is it’s our chance to show people that perfect is unrealistic. But while we’re not perfect, we do have a great relationship, and you can have one too, even if it doesn’t seem that way at the moment. We’re just two people with very hectic lives who are in love and want to make our love work, day by day. If we can find time to use the rules in our book and keep it together, you can too. Yes, it’ll take a little work, but a great relationship is worth so much more than any effort you put into it.
Q: You offer a set of “doable” rules for building a loving marriage—with the first being “finding and polishing the real you.” Explain how important this first rule is within a relationship.
A: None of us gets through childhood and adolescence without some baggage—some bumps and bruises to our psyches. Life is a contact sport. Preparing ourselves for a great relationship doesn't require that we eliminate every bit of baggage. It does mean dealing with it and learning to handle the situations and emotions that could turn into new baggage. And it was a learning process for us. As we have grown and matured, in our faith especially, we see that our premarital sex had a cost. Once sex enters the equation, there is no going back. It is a game changer and it could have easily turned into new baggage. But finding the best you doesn't mean dwelling on the mistakes or misdeeds of other people. It means facing yours so you can change your own actions and attitudes.
Q: Do you believe that placing an overemphasis on the physical side of a relationship early on simply invites trouble?