Many military spouses continue to set a place at the table for an absent partner; others make a point of turning down the bed on both sides, even though they know they’ll be sleeping alone. In our case, understanding that we were a family of three during my husband’s deployment, rather than a family of four, ultimately allowed us to get on with life rather than feeling the hole in our family at every point in the day. In re-creating our family, we never forgot my husband; we simply gave ourselves the freedom to have our own new traditions and ways of doing things.