Honor Your Inner Radiance
Tame the insidious voices that make you feel worthless or small and celebrate your own magnificence every day.
By Patricia Spadaro
The biggest roadblock to success in life is self-doubt. Doubt makes you susceptible to the critical voices--inside and out--that whisper negative affirmations such as, “I am not worthy, good enough, or capable enough to achieve my dreams.”
Don't let doubt stop you in your tracks. To keep doubts and doubters at bay, learn to celebrate the magnificent, shining part of you--even when life's storms momentarily eclipse its brilliance. Here are eight simple, but powerful, strategies to help you honor your inner radiance and keep voting for yourself--no matter what is happening around you.
Read the first tip on how to celebrate yourself .
Author Patricia Spadaro adapted this from her book Honor Yourself: The Inner Art of Giving and Receiving (Three Wings Press, 2009). For more information, visit www.PracticalSpirituality.info .
Write Yourself a Love Letter
Write Yourself a Love Letter
Pretend for a moment that you are your own greatest advocate and cheerleader. Now write a supportive and encouraging note to yourself as if you were cheering yourself on. Then pop it in an envelope and mail it to yourself. When you are traveling, send a postcard with an inspiring message to your home address. Right before shutting down your e-mail for the night, send yourself a note of appreciation so that you will see it first thing when you download your e-mail the next day. Develop the habit of applauding your own greatness in tangible ways.
Personalize Your Screen Saver
Personalize Your Screen Saver
Set the screen saver on your computer monitor to show images or affirmations that counteract the negative or doubting voices within and without. Be specific. Address what you are currently focusing on in your life. For example, you can set your screen saver to display a sentence or phrase that reminds you of your most important intention, such as “I take great care of myself because I deserve to be happy and healthy,” “I choose to spend my time in ways that energize and uplift me,” or “I listen to my own feelings when making decisions.” You might want to just use the simple phrase, “I honor myself every day."
Keep a Childhood Photo Nearby
Keep a Childhood Photo Nearby
Choose a photo of yourself as a child that reminds you of your innate joy, sweetness, curiosity, or love of life—a photo that reflects who you really are at heart. Buy a beautiful frame for it and place the photo somewhere where you can view it often. Every time you see it, let that heart-opening image put you back in touch with the precious part of yourself that reflects back to you your real nature.
Hang Out with Supporters
Hang Out with Supporters
If you allow yourself to be pressured or pummeled by someone who doesn’t appreciate your gifts, you will only be in a constant battle that will eat away at your energy and enthusiasm. You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone or justify your dreams and plans. Your job is to be you. Steer clear of critics and worrywarts. Surround yourself with friends who will champion your self-worth, cheer you on with both hands high in the air, and make you feel good about yourself—people you, in turn, can wholeheartedly support.
Turn On Your Windshield Wipers
Turn On Your Windshield Wipers
You may not be able to stop the rain that falls into your life, but you can turn on your windshield wiper to clear away the frustrations, criticisms, and self-doubts that, like a drenching downpour, can obscure your vision and make it hard to see where you’re going. When you’re feeling upset or when others aren’t valuing you, what helps you see clearly again? Taking some time alone? Meditation or prayer? Journaling? Exercise? Walking in nature? Watching an inspiring movie? Talking to a supportive friend? Scheduling a massage or a session with a life coach? Make a list of the tools that work for you so you don’t forget to put them into action when the storm clouds let loose.
Pull Out Your Feel-Good File
Pull Out Your Feel-Good File
To help you celebrate who you really are (not what others say you are) save all the cards, e-mails, and letters people have sent to thank you or express what they value or love about you. Save other mementos that bring to mind your strong points, your accomplishments, and the joy you have given others. Put them in a special box or file folder. When you’re beset, upset, or have lost sight of your smile for a while, pull out that collection. Read what’s inside to remind yourself that the drama or trauma that happens around you is not who you are.
Develop and Give Your Gifts
Develop and Give Your Gifts
Every one of us is wonderful in some way. Yet it’s so easy to concentrate on our shortcomings rather than applaud our positive qualities. Remember that you energize whatever you focus on. So why not focus on the part of you that shines? If you were to act on your greatness—the part of you that is meant to light the way for others—how would you give your gifts? What would you do to increase your capacity to give? Write down the answers to those questions and then ask yourself each week: What one step can I take, even if it’s a small one, to celebrate my greatness, develop my gifts, and give more of myself to others?
Create an Arsenal of Affirmations
Create an Arsenal of Affirmations
The best defense is a good offense. Doubts and detractors may try to unseat you, but you can be prepared ahead of time with the truth. Write down two or more affirmations to say aloud or to yourself to counter doubts and criticisms that may well up inside of you or come from others. Maybe you need to affirm “I am a magnificent being in the process of becoming ever more magnificent,” or “I have something important to say and I say it with confidence and ease,” or “My job is not to be perfect but to be the best I can be right now.” Keep these affirmations handy and, when the barrage comes, turn to your list and fire away with conviction in your heart.
