2016-06-30
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Cheerfulness is the best promoter of health, and is as friendly to the mind as to the body.
-Jose Addison

From "I'd Rather Do Chemo than Clean Out the Garage" by Fran Di Giacomo:

  • MY WIFE AND MY MONEY GO TO CHEMO

  • WARNING-CHEMO BRAIN DRIVER ON BOARD!

  • HONK IF YOUR HAIR FELL OUT TODAY

  • MY OTHER HOME IS A HOSPITAL

  • HONK IF YOU LOVE BALD MEN (TWICE IF YOU LOVE BALD WOMEN)

  • OUT OF MY WAY! IT'S A VERTICAL DAY AND I'M HEADED FOR THE MALL!
  • PARDON MY DRIVING-I'VE BEEN MARINATING

  • CHEMO-SHMEMO-I'M STANDING UP!

  • WARNING: IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU'RE FOLLOWING TOO CLOSELY. YOU HAVE ENTERED A TOXIC ZONE, AND MELTDOWN OF YOUR CAR COULD RESULT.

  • HOW'S MY DRIVING? CALL 1-800-MARINATE

  • I'M ON CHEMO. WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE?
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