Cheerfulness is the best promoter of health, and is as friendly to the mind as to the body. -Jose Addison

From "I'd Rather Do Chemo than Clean Out the Garage" by Fran Di Giacomo:

MY WIFE AND MY MONEY GO TO CHEMO

WARNING-CHEMO BRAIN DRIVER ON BOARD!

HONK IF YOUR HAIR FELL OUT TODAY

MY OTHER HOME IS A HOSPITAL

HONK IF YOU LOVE BALD MEN (TWICE IF YOU LOVE BALD WOMEN)

OUT OF MY WAY! IT'S A VERTICAL DAY AND I'M HEADED FOR THE MALL!

PARDON MY DRIVING-I'VE BEEN MARINATING

CHEMO-SHMEMO-I'M STANDING UP!

WARNING: IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU'RE FOLLOWING TOO CLOSELY. YOU HAVE ENTERED A TOXIC ZONE, AND MELTDOWN OF YOUR CAR COULD RESULT.

HOW'S MY DRIVING? CALL 1-800-MARINATE

I'M ON CHEMO. WHAT'S YOUR EXCUSE?