The Power of Forgiveness

How can I ever forgive?

Jordan’s letter to West continues: I was immediately hooked. I failed a drug test, was kicked off of the football team, and then I failed a second drug test. The second failed test got me a year suspension from both school and sports. During that year I was admitted to Cornerstone Recovery in Knoxville, Tennessee, and from there I was sent to Sandhills Teen Challenge in North Carolina. The drugs had become a way to hide and escape from the real issues I was trying to avoid, including a relationship with Jesus Christ. For a long time I never thought I would be able to forgive myself. It took nearly two and a half years, but I believe I have finally forgiven myself for my past. I know the Lord forgave me a long, long time ago.

How can I ever forgive?

Alice continues: When we arrived at the shelter, the boys sat on the floor and played while I answered questions and filled out registration forms. Then we were shown our room. We woke in the morning and went for a walk. With the first step outside the door, I knew we were home. I knew God had brought us home. At some point during our ten-year marriage, I conceded and simply accepted the abuse. But with acceptance I was still imprisoned. Now that I have broken free of that prison, I can choose to forgive my former husband’s actions, but I no longer choose to accept them. Forgiveness is, for me, a continuous issue. It is an ongoing process. Forgiveness allows me to tell my boys stories of the good times, memories that show them they come from a place of love. With forgiveness I feel no more anger. Forgiveness allows me greater perspective and helps me see our relationship for what it was.

How can I ever forgive?

Renee’s story continues: I could not imagine life without Meagan. I began to turn in the direction of forgiveness at Eric’s sentencing, seventeen months after the accident. Throughout the entire trial, Eric had shown little remorse for what he had done. This only served to fuel my anger. But I walked into his final sentencing already knowing in my heart I needed to forgive him. Then, as my entire family sat in the courtroom waiting to hear the judge’s verdict, Eric stood to share some last words. He began to weep as he said how sorry he was for what he had done. Then he turned to face my family and me. He stood there in handcuffs and a prison jumpsuit, tears streaming down his face, looking at me, and he said, “I would give my own life if it would bring back these girls, but it won’t . . . and I’m so sorry.”

How can I ever forgive?

Renee continues: That was a moment when healing began in my life. Suddenly, instead of anger, I began to feel compassion for this young man who had made a tragic mistake. For a long time I’d thought that by forgiving Eric, I would be betraying my daughter or, in a way, leaving her behind. I thought forgiving Eric was almost like saying, “What he did doesn’t matter.” But God showed me that forgiving Eric was the best way to honor Meagan and to assure that her loving legacy would live on. Today my story is a story of healing and forgiveness. My family and Lisa’s family chose to forgive Eric. We even appealed to have his 22-year prison sentence reduced.

How can I ever forgive?

Forgiveness. “My prayer is that as you read these stories, both new and old, you will find yourself taking a good look at your own story,” writes West, the author of the book Forgiveness. “Consider this as a time-out for you, perhaps even as a long overdue opportunity to examine your life, your relationships, your wounds, your past, your faith. I can almost guarantee that, like those ten-second hugs my brother and I shared, digging in to what God says about forgiveness will be uncomfortable at times. However, only the brave ones—only those of us willing to wrestle with this tough issue—will ever discover the joy, victory, healing, restoration, and power of one word: forgiveness.