Apologies in the Workplace

The Hazards of Gift Giving

Offering a gift as part of an apology can be a good way to make amends in private relationships, but selecting an appropriate gift can be particularly risky in the workplace. Giving a gift to a superior can look as if you’re trying to buy your way out of trouble—never a good idea—and giving a gift to a peer or a member of the support staff can seem condescending. If you feel compelled to give a gift to a co-worker as a way of making amends, it’s usually preferable to keep the gift financially modest and gender-neutral. Most often, the best gift you can give is your time and effort. Help your colleague finish a project, back him up in a public meeting, or drop your boss a memo or email describing something your co-worker said or did that you thought was particularly terrific.

The Company Hierarchy

Your coworkers usually fall into three broad categories: superiors (anyone who’s above you on the organizational chart), your peers, and people ranked beneath you on the company’s organizational chart. Each category requires a slightly different approach. So, for instance, if you have to apologize to a superior: Talk to your boss first. If you need to apologize to a superior, make sure to tell your boss what has happened first (unless, of course, you’re apologizing to your boss). If you and your boss have a good relationship, she may be able to help you in making your apology effective, and she can assist you in managing any fallout. Even if you don’t have the world’s best relationship with your boss, it’s important to let her know what happened. Otherwise, you’ll almost certainly end up having to apologize separately not only for whatever you did in the first place but also for failing to keep her in the loop.