25 Rules for Mothers of Daughter: A Spiritual Primer

Mistakes

Let her be wild. She may want to stay home and read books on the couch, or she may want to hop on the back of a motorcycle-gasp. She may be a homebody or a traveler. She may fall in love with the wrong boy, or meet mr. right at age 5. Try to remember that you were her age once. Everyone makes mistakes, let her make her own.

✻Strong souls are built on failure and disappointment. Give your daughter the gift of independence by allowing her to make her own mistakes. God will forgive.

Now you see both how kind and how hard God can be. He was hard on those who fell, but he was kind to you. And he will keep on being kind to you, if you keep on trusting in his kindness. ~Romans 11:22

Independence

negative to positive thinking

Teach her to be independent. Show her by example that woman can be strong. Find and follow your own passions. Search for outlets of expression and enjoyment for yourself- not just your husband or children. Define yourself by your own attributes, not by what others expect you to be. Know who you are as a person, and help your daughter find out who she is.

✻You are first and foremost your own person. Motherhood is only one of your roles. Don't lose sight of your own goals, hopes, and dreams. All the good within you radiates through to your daughter.

Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity and dignity. ~Titus 2:7

Possibilities

Give her good role models- you being one of them. Introduce her to successful woman- friends, co-workers, doctors, astronauts, or authors. Read to her about influential woman- Eleanor Roosevelt, Rosa Parks, Marie Curie. Read her the words of inspirational woman- Jane Austen, Sylvia Plath, Emily Dickinson. She should know that anything is possible.

✻With faith, anything is possible. If you want your daughter to know endless possibilities, help her to stengthen her faith. Speak lovingly, and speak often of God, faith follows.

He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.” ~Matthew 17:20

18. Sing

Encourage her to dance and sing. Dance and sing with her- even if it sounds or looks horrible. Let her wiggle to nursery rhymes. Let her dance on her daddy's feet and spin in your arms. Then later, let her blast noise and headbang in her bedroom with her door shut if she wants. Or karaoke to Tom Petty in the living room if she would rather. Introduce her to the classics- like The Beatles- and listen to her latest favorite- like Taylor Swift. Share the magic of music together, it will bring you closer- or at least create a soundtrack to your life together.

✻We are divinely commanded to sing. Get excited and tell your daughter that when she lifts her voice in song she is praising God. Deepen your family relationship through music, praise, and a voice devoted to God.

Sing a new song to the Lord! Sing his praises from the ends of the earth! Sing, all you who sail the seas, all you who live in distant coastlands. ~Isaiah 42:10

21. Justice

Teach her when to stand-up and when to walk away. Whether she has classmates who tease her because of her glasses, or a boyfriend who tells her she is too fat - let her know she does not have to listen. Make sure she knows how to demand respect - she is worthy of it. It does not mean she has to fight back with fists or words, because sometimes you say more with silence. Also make sure she knows which battles are worth fighting. Remind her that some people can be mean and nasty because of jealousy, or other personal reasons. Help her to understand when to shut her mouth and walk-away. Teach her to be the better person.

✻Teach your daughter about social justice. Raise her up to be an advocate for the voiceless, and an activist for those who can not do for themselves. Let her know that to do for others is God's work, and it's her job to serve the Lord.

Abraham approached God and said, “Will you sweep away both the righteous and the wicked? Suppose you find fifty righteous people living there in the city—will you still sweep it away and not spare it for their sakes? ~Genesis 18:23

22. Love

pictures of hugging

Let her choose who she loves. Even when you see through the charming boy she thinks he is, let her love him without your disapproving words; she will anyway. When he breaks her heart, be there for her with words of support rather than I told-you-so. Let her mess up again and again until she finds the one. And when she finds the one, tell her.

✻It's not your choice Mom, it's hers. Daughters will love as they choose. Soul mates are a product of God's generosity, keep that in mind. When the time is right and the love is right, all will recognize the love that is right.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. ~Corinthians 13:4-7

24. Comfort

prayers for healing

Comfort her. Because sometimes you just need your mommy. When she is sick, rub her back, make her soup and cover her in blankets - no matter how old she is. Someday, if she is giving birth to her own child, push her hair out of her face, encourage her, and tell her how beautiful she is. These are the moments she will remember you for. And someday when her husband rubs her back in attempt to comfort her...she may just whisper, "I need my mommy."

✻God gives you your daughter for life, and then for eternity. Use the time you have to be a comfort and a joy.

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate. ~Psalm 127:3-5

25. Home

prayers for healing

Be home. When she is sick with a cold or broken heart, she will come to you; welcome her. When she is engaged or pregnant, she will run to you to share her news; embrace her. When she is lost or confused, she will search for you; find her. When she needs advice on boys, schools, friends or an outfit; tell her. She is your daughter and will always need a safe harbor - where she can turn a key to see comforting eyes and a familiar smile; be home.

✻It is up to you to make a house a home. Be completely present in every nook and cranny of every room in your home. Fill it with your loving spirit. Wash the walls with faith. Scent it with God. Once you do that, your daughter will always find her way home.

For we know that if the tent that is our earthly home is destroyed, we have a building from God, a house not made with hands, eternal in the heavens. Corinthians 5:1