Marriage is a blessing from God. We are told this in Proverbs 18:22: “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.” When we think of marriage as a gift and blessing, we see that even in its pain and brokenness, it is worth saving. God can save your broken marriage if you allow Him to. Too many couples resort to divorce before seeking God’s counsel in their relationship. If you’re experiencing brokenness in your relationship or on the brink of giving up, allow God to heal your marriage. Here’s how:
If you’re experiencing trouble in your marriage, it is essential that you pray for your mate daily. Prayer is our direct line of communication with God. We are told through Scripture that whatever we ask for in prayer, to believe that we’ve received it and it will be ours. (Mark 11:24). It is important that you seek His wisdom and guidance when it comes to your marriage. We are told in James 1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” It’s important that you follow this example in your marriage. Take your marital problems to God, and ask Him for His wisdom. It’s easy to dwell on the bad, but during this time, focus on the positive. When you’re praying for your mate, express your thanks. Thank God for blessing you with the gift of marriage, and present to Him all the reasons you’re thankful for his/her presence in your life. This will help you accentuate the positive, and reflect on the ways your spouse is aiding in your own strength and happiness.
Focus on 1 Corinthians 13: 1-7
1 Corinthians 13, also considered the “love passage” is one of the most familiar chapters in the Bible and is typically read during wedding and anniversary celebrations. However, this was not the original intent of these verses. In this chapter, Paul is telling a dysfunctional church how they are abusing their spiritual gifts and reflecting on Christ’s perfect love for us. Too often in our marriages we think of love as an emotion, not an action and do what we want based of the way we feel. But love is not an emotion, but an action and Christ demonstrated this perfect love to us. If you’re dealing with trouble or obstacles in your marriage, remember Christ’s perfect love for us, and use this as a model for the way you will reflect love with your partner. 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7, tells us: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” Walk through each verse line by line. For example, if you’re experiencing a lack of patience with your partner, say to yourself, “Just as Christ was patient, I will be patient,” or if you’re experiencing a lack of honor in your marriage, say to yourself, “Just as Christ didn’t dishonor, I will not dishonor my partner.” Allow these verses to be a source of discipline and help you to reflect Christ better in your marriage.
Healing will take time. It’s important that on your marital journey, you both are 100 percent committed to your marriage and when the going gets tough, you are both 100 percent committed to saving your marriage. This commitment will require sacrifice. This may mean you and your partner letting go of the wants and desires that are tearing your relationship down. This includes desires of the flesh. We are told in Galatians 5:17 “For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.” Remember, you made a promise before God on your wedding day, and this promise was centered on a commitment to your partner and God. If you’re truly dedicated to your marriage, you will make the necessary sacrifices in an effort to make things work. Nobody said it would be easy, but it will be worth it.
Usually, marriages don’t fall into trouble over night, so there shouldn’t be an expectation for your marriage to be saved over night, even if you desperately want it to be. The problems most couples deal with in their marriage are a result of a number of offenses that have occurred over time. These offenses build a space of hurt and animosity that if not dealt with can build major resentment, and really tear your marriage apart. It’s important that you practice patience in your marriage, not only patience with your mate, but patience with yourself. If your spouse doesn’t change immediately, that’s ok. If you don’t change immediately, that’s ok. As long as both of you are committed to change, you know that they are invested in restoring the marriage and a positive end rselt. Focus on the part you’re playing in the equation. Your marriage will be tested, again and again and again but when you practice patience; you know that God will get you through whatever trial you may be facing.