I don't make enough time to listen.
I’m amazed at the things Nadia says when I make real space for her to share. It's hilarious stuff, and frustrations and tears that I knew little about. Last night, it was only us around the fireplace, with the kids in bed and me asking questions. She told me how she’d borrowed my dad’s construction earmuffs to sand a table. Then when the kids are loud after school, she started wearing them around the house also. She’s an introvert, and her inner self was getting squashed by the incessant noise.
At work, I make time to meet one-on-one with people I manage. We set goals together. Follow up on important items. See what I help I can give. Why not do something even better with my wife? Are the people I manage more important to me than her?
Whether it’s a date, dinner at home, or talks before bed, be intentional about doing whatever works. If you don’t make time to listen, you’re likely to hear what she’s thinking later.