6 Signs You Might Be Smothering Your Spouse

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The idea of “smothering” our spouse might sound odd, especially when you got married so you could spend the rest of your lives in union together. But feeling smothered in your marriage is a real issue that many of us don’t want to admit. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend quality time with your significant other. In fact, it’s a good thing. But it can become overwhelming when the desire feels forced or isn’t reciprocated. Smothering usually has good intentions behind it. You may be going through a phase or trial in your marriage and believe that if you spend as much time as possible together, the relationship will get better. But, if your spouse feels smothered, they will begin to withdraw from you when left unchecked. Here are six signs you might be smothering your spouse. These issues can cause friction and even resentment towards one another.

You Don’t Want Your Spouse to Spend Time with Friends and Family Because You Think You Fulfill Each Other’s Needs

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It’s one thing to love spending quality time with your significant other but when you begin to isolate them from family and friends because you “only need each other,” there’s a problem. It’s healthy for you to have relationships outside of your marriage. Many couples today believe that love means spending every single moment with each other, but you need time to breathe. It’s important that your marriage includes time with the people that matter most to the two of you. You can’t look to your spouse for everything.

They Get Distracted or Irritable During Long Conversations

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Is your spouse shutting down the longer you talk to them? If so, there’s a problem, Houston. Yes, there are those who rather listen in conversations than talk, but we often know those differences when we marry a person we know well. If you notice your partner zoning out or glazing over when you’re talking to them, you should ask them their opinion or if something is wrong. You should also be willing to listen to their answer. If your spouse feels like they are being smothered by too much conversation at one time, you should be willing to give them some space, especially if they are the introverted type. If you don’t, they may feel emotionally drained.

You’re Obsessed with Checking Their Phone

It’s OK to establish a policy of trust in your marriage which may include not having a lock on your phone and sharing password details, but constantly checking your spouse’s phone to see who they are talking to is not OK. In fact, it’s obsessive, controlling and lacks integrity. If your partner leaves their phone around you in a room when they are not around, they clearly trust you to be near their phone without getting sneaky. If your spouse knows you’re constantly in their phone or discovers you are doing this, they will feel violated and disrespected. This kind of obsessive behavior will also lead to paranoia and insecurity.