The world is full of lies when it comes to love.
We hear a lot about love from movies, social media, and friends, but many of these messages are misleading. They shape what we expect from love and can leave us feeling let down. People often say that love should be easy or that meeting the right person will solve all our problems. But these ideas don’t match the deeper truth about love we find in Scripture and in real life. If we believe these things, we might start to measure our worth and our future by them. When we recognize and let go of these common myths, we can hold on to truths that protect our hearts, help our relationships grow, and keep us focused on God’s purpose for love.
1. Love is Easy
Despite what we see in the media, love is not easy. Love takes hard work. Paul tells us, “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:1-7).
2. Love Will Make Me Always Happy
Many people think love is the missing piece in their lives. You may think, “Love will always make me happy!” Although this is a common teaching in media and culture, it is not true. You will have fights, arguments, and discord with your loved ones. Love is not perfect — it can be quite messy at times.
Loving someone means calling them out on their bad behavior. In the same way, if someone loves you, they will call you out when they see you doing something wrong. Love is not a walk in the park, nor will it always bring joy to your heart. Believing the lie that love will always make you happy will only tear down your true sense of self, others, and love.
3. There is Only One Soulmate For Everyone
Another lie that leads to heartbreak is that there is only one soulmate for every person. While this sounds romantic, it is not true. The only “One” for each person is Jesus. As far as romantic relationships go, there could be many people you are compatible with. Therefore, if things didn't work out with someone you really liked, know there are many other people you will click with.
Rather than believing the lie that you are doomed to be alone, try to meet someone else through friends. Ask them if they know anyone who has the same interests or hobbies as you. Even if this person proves to not be the one for you, know that there are many other people out there. Keep looking, praying, and trusting God.
4. If You Don't Find “The One,” You Are Not Good Enough
Sadly, it is very common to believe the lie that you are not good enough if you have not found “The One.” If you are struggling with this thought today, know that it is not true. You are enough just as you are. God says you are fearfully and wonderfully made just as you are (Psalm 139:13-14). Just because you have not found a romantic partner yet does not mean you are not good enough.
Instead, it just means you haven't found the right person yet. Utilize this time now to work on your self-view. Ask God to help you see yourself as He does, study His Word, and apply the Bible to your life. With time, you will see that you are good enough just as you are. You don't have to be in a relationship to be “good enough.” You are God's beloved child (1 John 3:1).
5. Being in a Relationship Will Complete Me
Another common lie we believe about love that ends in heartbreak is that being in a relationship will complete us. Being in a relationship or not is not a defining factor of our wholeness. Rather, we are complete in Christ. Paul tells us, “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority” (Colossians 2:9-10).
You are complete just as you are; you are not lacking anything. Never believe the lie that a relationship will make you feel whole. Sadly, sometimes, a relationship might do the exact opposite.
6. My Entire Purpose in Life is Found in Love
Unfortunately, another lie often believed when it comes to love is that your entire purpose is found in love. For example, if you are not in love, then you don't really have a life or a motivation to live. Believing this lie will ultimately end in heartbreak. Try to remember that your entire purpose is found in Christ — not in another person, a relationship, or a marriage. Jesus loves you so much that He died for you; there is no greater love than the love He has for you (John 3:16; 15:13).
7. I Can Change Him or Her
A final lie that inevitably ends in heartbreak is the belief that you can change the person you are with. Sadly, there is nothing you can do to change a person. Unless they are walking with Jesus and allowing the Holy Spirit to change them, there is nothing you can do. Abandon this type of thinking, as it will only hurt you in the end.
The world likes to tell us many lies when it comes to love; unfortunately, they all end in heartbreak. A few lies to look out for include the teaching that love is easy, love will always make you happy, there is only one soulmate for each person, you are not good enough if you have not found “the one,” being in a relationship with complete you, your entire purpose is found in love, and that you can change him or her.
