8 Blind Date Tips

Helpful Advice for Blind Dating

By Megan Carson

I’ve been on over 30 blind dates in the last two years. To me a “thoughtful set-up” by a third party is one where I would have more in common with my date than just being single and having a pulse.

Before I agree to meet any date (one who could be my potential mate or a new friend), I find out answers to a few questions: Do we have similar interests? Do we hold a common set of beliefs and values? How does the guy feel about travel, sports, and sharing dessert?

If we align on a few of these items, I set plans for a blind date. While blind dates may be nerve-racking, I know plenty of men and women who have found those temporary nerves to be well worth it when the end result was a deep and meaningful relationship.

Megan Carson is the author of A Year of Blind Dates: A Single Girl's Search for The One. She enjoys running, traveling, dessert, and trips to Target. Check her out at www.megancarson.com.

Discern Your Desires

Before you even start dating, spend time thinking about what you’re looking for in a potential mate. Make sure you know what you’re willing to negotiate on like height, age or a shared love of mint chocolate chip ice cream.

It’s equally important to know what you’re not willing to negotiate. If soulful things like spirituality, thoughtfulness, and compassion are of interest to you, then be sure to only date someone who has those qualities.

Writing down what you’re looking for in a mate helps you stay on track when you meet someone you’re not sure you have a connection with or who may not be right for you. Just be sure to be open to changing the list as during the dating process you realize some things are not as important as others.

Create Your Own Expectations

If you are being set up by a trusted friend and you’ve had an opportunity to speak to your date on the phone or chat via email, you should be confident that the date won’t be a disaster.

Optimistically, you can expect good conversation, an opportunity to learn something new, and the chance to work on your dating skills. If you keep your expectations realistic, you’ll be pleasantly surprised when the date exceeds those expectations.

Before your date, take a moment to collect your thoughts and pause to reflect on what you can do to make sure the date is a success. Think on those ideas for a moment before the date begins. Once you’ve committed those expectations to memory, it will be easier to make them a reality.

Open Your Mind

Oftentimes, the moment we see our date, we already sense it may not be a romantic match. Regardless of what you may be feeling, be respectful, kind, and gracious.

Even if that romantic energy is missing, don’t discount the opportunity to open yourself up to the person being in your life for however long it may be. Maybe you have to learn something about yourself that will make you a better human being as well as a better dater.

Don’t make a decision about romantic feelings toward your date until your time together is done. As a date progresses, remind your heart and mind that it’s important to be open to any reason why this person might have been brought into your life.