mother to be

Being a mother is a very important role that the Lord chooses to give to many women. Children are a gift from Him (Psalm 127:3-5), and God uses the Bible to help lay out how a mother should raise her child. Taking that leap to having your first child and becoming a mother, though, can be pretty scary. It's a huge life changing event, and will redefine what you think unconditional love means. It's something that should be taken very seriously and thoughtfully considered upon.

While reflecting upon starting a family, you might be worried that you aren't prepared for such a role. God, though, might be giving you the signs that you are ready. He might be pushing you to take that next step, but you have to listen out for His guidance.

Here are some signs that God wants to help you answer the question: am I ready to be a mom? 

You feel your heart is open to a new addition.

This might seem like a silly sign, but it’s an important one. Sometimes the question isn’t if you are ready to have a child, but rather if you are able to love a new child. It’s incredibly hard to give our best to a newborn if we aren’t ready to accept that role of a new parent. Your heart has to want to accept the new changes that come with the job, because it’s not always going to be easy. Your capacity to love can be blocked if you are holding onto past trauma or emotional baggage. These wounds can heal, but only if you make it a point to work on yourself. If you believe God is opening up your heart to the new experience, then it’s a sign it might be time to being.

You are responsible.

There is an incredibly important amount of responsibility that comes with having a baby. Think about it, you become someone’s mother. Your life affects another life about as deeply as it possibly can. Your choices, words, attitudes, experiences all affect how your kids develop. However, you may be already looking forward to such a responsibility. Over the last few years you may have felt yourself growing up and desiring a chance to settle down. If you have cleaned up your act from your fun college days, it might be a way of God telling you that you are responsible enough for the job.

There are little signs from God.

The little coincidences in your life might not be coincidences at all, but God’s sneaky way of pushing you down the path of motherhood. You hear sermons that resonate with you deeply about the importance of family, or have other trusted friends telling you it’s time. You might feel like everywhere you turn there is another baby, but chalk it up to being a coincidences and nothing more. All these avenues are possible signs from the Lord Himself. He will make sure you hear exactly what you need to hear, but you have to be willing to listen out for His voice.

You are financially stable.

Before adding a baby to your family, you need to look at your budget, income, healthcare coverage, maternity leave, and work schedule’s flexibility. Are you at a job where you feel comfortable taking off for a while? Do you have money in savings to start the first few years off? If you feel confident that you can provide your new bundle of joy with everything they need, then nothing should hold you back. God will set you up to have the appropriate resources if it's time.

Your spouse feels ready.

It’s one thing to feel that you yourself are ready to have a child, but if your spouse doesn’t that’s a red flag it’s not time. Parenting is a couple-commitment. You can hope that your spouse will want them down the line, or will be ready by the time a baby arrives. However that’s not necessarily the best way to go about things. God wants both partners to be all-in, ready to take on the responsibility of parenthood. This should be an exciting, happy event for a married couple to start a family where everyone feels ready. It’s ok if you both aren’t. Perhaps one of you isn’t emotionally healthy or has some more growing up to do. Regardless of the reason, how you handle one of you not being ready to parent reveals how ready you actually are. If the “ready” spouse responds with pouting, whining, punishing, pressuring, or manipulation, then nobody is ready. Immature behaviors should be long gone before you begin parenting, and if you are fighting with your spouse over issues like these then there are other issues in the relationship that need to get addressed first.

You want a baby.

Even though the thought of starting a family terrifies you, deep down in your heart you truly want to have a baby. You might have gotten the itch to create a nursery board on Pinterest, or go into a maternity store “just to look.” Even faced with all the unknowns and uncertainty of parenthood, you secretly think that you are ready for the task and would take it seriously. You’re capable of so much more than you think you can handle, and God wouldn't set you up for something so important just to have you fail. He put the desire to want to have a family in your heart, so that you could be prepared to be a great mother. Don’t hush the part of you that knows you are ready out of fear. Listen to your heart, and go with your gut. It’s God’s way of moving you in the right direction.

Bringing life into this world is a beautiful way to glorify God. No matter how scared you may be, God will be there for you every step of the way. He wants to see your family flourish and blossom, and will give you the signs if this is the right time to begin. Trust in Him!

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