No one enjoys loss. Grieving is not something we look forward to. Most of us avoid emotional pain like the plague.
And yet, grief invades our lives.
When we are hit by loss, our worlds shake. We blink and wonder what happened. We're stunned. Our minds spin. Our emotions begin to boil.
When we see the word "grief," most of us think of the death of someone we care about. Estrangements, separations, break-ups, divorces, financial losses, moves, and job terminations are also grief-producers. We've all experienced deep disappointments, shattered dreams, and crushed hopes. Life is full of surprising challenges that we don't like and didn't plan on. We experience many little deaths along the way.
Somewhere along the road of life, most of us developed a concept of what grief is and how it should go. We experience loss and see it in other's lives. No one likes loss, so we naturally interpret it as something negative. We begin to nurture concepts and ideas of what we want the grief process to be like. Mix into this a heavy dose of the opinions of those around us and most of us end up believing some rather strange things about grief.
Here are some of the myths we may have embraced. We might never say these things, but our behavior often reveals the unrealistic expectations we have for ourselves and others when it comes to loss and grieving. Of course, the key question is, "What does God think about loss and grief?”