12 Hidden Secrets to a Man’s Success

Virtue

“Men and nations are not great by virtue of their wealth, but by the wealth of their virtue,” says Paul Cole of the Christian Men’s Network. “Character, resolve, faith, courage – it is unseen things that create what is seen. It is what’s inside our hearts that determines the success of our lives, not personality, position or talent.”

For 35 years, the Christian Men’s Network has been a highly effective global movement of pastors and leaders. Cole describes the ministry as being “dedicated to training men toward their roles as servant-leaders in their families, church and culture.”

The ministry was founded in 1977 by his father, Dr. Edwin Louis Cole, author of the bestselling Maximized Manhood. The network’s purpose is to lead men into “maximized” manhood, which Cole says means to be like Jesus Christ.

“What are the traits that make up successful people?” asks Paul Cole. “True success is to fully satisfy the design of God in your life, and it starts in your heart. Harry Truman is considered one of the great US presidents not because of his eloquence or economic achievement. He went bankrupt before serving as president and survived after the presidency only by selling the family farm. But his success was in making the big decisions, based on the character, honor and virtue of his heart.”

Who are you?

Private philosophy determines public performance. What you do publicly is determined by what you meditate on privately. The lie that what a person does in their private life is their own business is just that – a lie. What a child molester meditates on before he molests affects the entire world around him. Those who want to justify and protect their own immoral activities love this lie. The antidote to the lie is the truth – that whatever a man believes in private, what he practices and builds into his character, determines the actions and decisions he makes in public. No man makes a failure or a success of himself without first meditating on it in private. What you are in private will eventually be who you are in public.

Maturity

Maturity does not come with age, but with the acceptance of responsibility. Maturity is doing the right thing, when it needs to be done, regardless of the circumstances, emotions or temptations of the moment. Daring to be mature when immaturity is the “cultural cool” is the ultimate challenge for men today who wish to be successful. Immature males permeate the media. Men hopelessly grasping to the “glory days” of their youth, rather than accepting responsibility for their age, their family, their career, exhibit a maturity crisis. That crisis is an image crisis that is embraced, celebrated and also lampooned by the media. With such images, it seems harder than ever to accept personal responsibility. Successful men find the courage to accept responsibility, unhinge themselves from the images, and move forward.

Reputation

Reputation is one thing you can build that will outlast you, and will grow larger or smaller after you’re gone. Reputation is so valuable, that the Apostle Paul admonished Timothy he could not be a leader without it. Reputation is so valuable that a competitor will smear yours, just to get ahead of you. Reputation is so valuable that a con man will use yours to get what he cannot get on his own. A woman who takes a man’s “name” in marriage actually takes his reputation. She exchanges her family reputation for his. Children are stuck with their dad’s reputation outside the home. A dad is stuck with the reputation he has built inside the home with his own children. And one day, every man is going to stand before a Heavenly Father who asks one thing – what did you do with my Son Jesus – and each of us has to live with the reputation we built, based on the answer to that one question. What reputation do you have with your wife? Your kids? Your God? It’s hard to overstate reputation’s importance.

It’s your choice

Your habits are under your power of choice, but once you make the choice, you become the servant to the choice. The great baseball pitcher Nolan Ryan pitched seven no-hitters. In an edited video of his pitches, showing one after another successively, it looks like a continuous replay of the same pitch. He became great because he never deviated from the habits he learned in practice. The same concentration is needed to achieve greatness anywhere. A man can know and understand something and even do it successfully once or twice, but the ability to accomplish the same thing routinely is where true success is found. The greatest of men discipline themselves to practice success-breeding habits.

Relationships are everything

Family and friends, not money, are life’s greatest treasures. A friend is life’s shock absorber. Friends are the true riches of life, but choose your friendships carefully. Good character is corrupted by bad friendships. When your closest friends do not share your vision, they can become your chief critics and worst dream-killers. That is why, as you rise from one level of life to another, your intimate friendships may change. The greatness of the life of the prophet Abraham was, according to Scripture, “Abraham was a friend of God.” Who you connect your life to will either lift you up or let you down. You will become just like your heroes. That’s the good news, and the bad news. Connect your life to heroes of faith!