Understand the Nature of Roles
God is orderly. He created the natural laws of the universe by which everything runs like clockwork, after all. Scripturally, He created roles in families, as well.
The word “role” is contentious. To many, it represents a cage, or a set of inviolable instructions by which we must live, or face consequences.
The scriptural truth? That’s not what roles are at all. Let’s rethink the word.
Every government, corporation, and organization runs on a certain hierarchy. If they didn’t, anarchy would prevail and nothing would ever get done. For the Christian family, God is the CEO. He’s the president, right up there at the top.
While the roles of parents and child are fairly well-established and defined, the Biblical roles outlined for husband and wife are where the controversy lies. Throughout history, many have interpreted scripture as commanding that wives be absolutely subservient to their husbands, who hold utter dominion over the family.
That’s not correct.
The key here is found in Ephesians 5:22-24, “The husband is head of his wife as Christ is head of the church…” Notice that this scripture doesn’t simply say that the husband is the head of the wife—it says that he does so as Christ is head of the church. This makes all the difference. Christ’s leadership isn’t merely dominion—it’s servitude, too. Christ died for us. He was made humble flesh for us. He led through example, not force. Yes—scripturally, the man should strive to be the leader of his household, but that leadership is not our idea of leadership—it’s Christ’s. It’s leadership that comes out of love, humility, and communication, not tyranny.
Keep God at the top, in the president’s seat, and remember His version of familial roles—not man’s popular view.