3. Keep Dating
I'm serious here. Visiting with your spouse with some regularity--just
the two of you and no one else--will bring some very definite rewards
to a marriage. By dating, you will learn how to TALK to each other
In her book, "Mating in Captivity," Esther Perel urges
a client to imagine her spouse as if she has just met him, to put him
into that mysterious category again. This is really hard when you got a
little one screaming, "Wipe me!" from the bathroom. However, when you
can pull it off, I find her theory very effective.
Here are a few rules for date night:
No kid talk * No eavesdropping * No fighting * No flirting (with other
people) * No whining or crying * No flatulence * No technology
(cellphones, BlackBerries, iPhones, or iPods) * No interrupting * No
belching, spitting, or vomiting * No heavy boozing * No blogging about
it * No Christmas sweaters, polyester dresses, or ratty underwear.