Sit with the feelings and sensations that come with the regret, so that you are then able to release these feelings. Repression won’t help us with our regrets. If the regret causes sadness or anger, we need to feel these things. In feeling them, and not being afraid to feel them, we are then able to release them.
We actually cause worse problems for ourselves when we try to stuff the feelings or pretend that they are not there. I don’t know who originally said this, but a friend passed it on and I think it’s true: ”We cause more problems for ourselves and others when we try to escape our pain rather than feel it.”
Many of us have picked up the wrong message that feelings of anger or sadness are “negative,” and that we need to get rid of them in some way- so that we are inclined to judge ourselves for feeling these things. If you can, let that judgment go. Feelings are never “wrong” or “right.” What we do with our feelings and how we learn from them are the important thing. Sometimes the feelings of anger or sadness can be so strong that we feel out of control. In times like these, it can be helpful to let ourselves feel these emotions when we are in the presence of another trusted person.