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We were told as kids that we can do anything we wanted to do as long as we worked hard to achieve it. Things are a lot different now as adults. Finding the right job with the correct leadership is hard. We want to grow, develop our skills, do a good job with the company, and remain passionate. But as adults, the path is not always straight, and finding the right fit takes sometimes years and we might find out that we don’t want to remain in the same field or company anymore.

How can we find the job we were born to do? It takes trial and error, and learning what our passions are. This will start with soul searching, and realizing if it is all about a paycheck, that we could just be miserable. The first thing is being honest with yourself and your talents. Ask some key questions: “What am I passionate about?” and “What does the ideal place to work mean to me?” There are no perfect answers, but if you avoid the truth—you can’t do this professionally or personally. We also need to be realistic and idealist, as the job market is not as inviting as it once was, so we need to be smart about our choices as well. We don’t want you to quit a good job on a whim and not be able to pay the mortgage.

There is a quiz you can take to help you find the right job. Like the Myers Briggs Type Indicator to assess your personality, and what career might be a great fit. This is not a guarantee, but taking some assessments will help you clarify or get a better idea on what to do. This doesn’t replace experience. We need to freelance and get experience to find out what works for us and doesn’t work for us, Forbes reported. “To start, make a list of potential jobs and career paths that interest you. These may be directly related to your college degree (if you have one), or they may not. Then, start researching each field through online searches, consulting your network, and scheduling informational interviews or job shadows."

Also we need to follow out heart. What truly is your life path? It does not happen overnight, like a bolt of lightning, but we expect this to be the case for us! You’re in good company. Painter Vincent Van Gogh worked in the Belgian coal mines, and even taught school for some time. Henry Ford had an early business that failed him and it left him broke before he found his true calling by starting the Ford Motor Company. We can learn here that it takes time to find what we are called to do. It can take many years before we find the correct door. What I can tell you. If you’re dreading going to work or avoid talking about the career you are currently in, the path is not for you. This is not to say everyday needs to be bliss at work, but there needs to be a spark—passion is not the only goal. If the passion is there, but management or the company is burning you out, or there is no growth—then look at moving on. This is a sign to rethink your career strategy. Look at what you are good at, and build on that outside of work, if you lost the passion and zeal. We can’t always blame others for our predicaments. We have a choice to be excellent. “Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit,” Greek philosopher Aristotle said. Make this your time and move forward with excellence.

Are you numb? People want to do something different, but feel they are in a rut. This is from being confused, complacent, giving up, or just depressed about their situation. “Their main reason for not leaving is that they haven’t actually figured out what it is that they want to do. This thinking is flawed because you won’t learn or discover your ideal career or job by sitting around and thinking about it. If the current situation isn’t working, you need to find something else,” Career expert Deena Varshavskaya shared. She also said she left a job in blind faith, not knowing where she would land, because she was so miserable, she left. “Frustrated, I tried giving feedback to the management and eventually gave notice without much planning. To my surprise, I was offered two weeks of severance, which was much-much needed since I had no savings to hold me over.” Sometimes we need to take a step of faith to find the right place for us to go. You don’t have to quit in haste, but look at your options. Here are some gut checks it is time move on. You have no peace, can’t sleep, you are dismissed, overlooked, just a number, and you want to cry when thinking about driving back to the work the next day.

Be clear on what you don’t want. Make a list of what will not work for you. It could be not wanting to do a traditional 9-5 job, working inside, or poor work ethics. What other activity pushes you into total discontent? Think for a moment the time dedicated to the tasks or activities that you hate doing. Draw a line on what you will tolerate and not tolerate. Life coach Valorie Buton said we need boundaries and to anticipate the negative, but we can fight back with positive. If you don’t like where you are, build a ladder to get out. During the process there will be negative thoughts and fear. “Expect negative thoughts to cross your mind, especially when you are dealing with stress. But choose not to ruminate on them,” she said. “Rumination means meditating on the negative – and doing it often enough can have serious mental health consequences such as depression. Instead, meditate on the positive. Focus on what you are grateful for. Focus on the opportunity you have for change and improvement. These are things within your control.”

No matter where you are, you can shine. Finding the job you were born to do will take time, and self-reflection. Don’t give up on yourself or your heart's desires. It takes one step at a time to make progress.
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