My childhood nanny, Mrs. Kelly, had told me that when I saw an angel, I had to have faith that it was real, because I could trust its presence. That was fine when I was a kid, but as I’ve matured, the innocence of that statement has taken on a new meaning. I’ve always considered myself a bit of a skeptic...I have to see it to believe it. I’ve also been reluctant to claim any total explanation of my experiences, because I know that I don’t have all the facts—just the evidence of experience, which for me is absolute and true. But I know that angels are real because I’ve seen and experienced one.
One day I met with Yvonne [a friend] to demonstrate a new massage technique I’d developed that was accompanied by spoken-word visualization—that is, meditation. It was a really effective method of relaxation, and it was clearly having a positive impact on my clients. I began Yvonne’s massage the same way as always, standing behind her and moving my hands rhythmically up her spine and around the shoulders as I spoke my initial prayer for guidance, protection, and healing. I followed this with spoken meditation, saying, “On a white sandy beach by an enchanted ocean in a place called Sanctuary,” and what occurred after about ten minutes was astounding.
I experienced my spirit being lifted up out of my body as if it were merely the container of my consciousness. It felt as though a force that was part of me but not under my direction was pulling me out. I heard my voice continue to speak the words of the meditation, and I felt the rhythm of my arms moving at a distance until the five-sensory experience dissolved altogether. I found myself in a strange new environment, fully aware and conscious—and very surprised. I was surrounded by grainy light, which I’ve come to recognize as a signal that I’ve entered the peripheral dimension that I sometimes find myself in during readings or deep meditative states. I was, however, keenly aware of being transferred from one realm to the other—from my ordinary reality to this other place, which had very obvious characteristics that were both like and unlike my usual day-to-day experience.
I found myself in front of a huge door that I couldn’t see the top of, and I noticed that the bottom had enough space for me to crawl under. As I did so, I entered a huge courtyard with stone archways towering into cloudy air and bright beams of light shining down onto the floor, which looked like a black-and-white chessboard. Something more solid appeared in front of me; and I saw a huge, 30-foot tall creature with what appeared to be wings looming over me. It had no face—just a blinding, bright light that observed me with total comprehension.
At first I was really frightened, because I’d never felt so exposed and “known” by anything in my life. I truly thought that this being could see everything about me that I couldn’t, and the feeling was terribly unnerving. I remember wondering aloud if this was what an angel was. It picked me up, and I found myself cradled among its weblike feathers. They seemed to be made of light, white threads—part web, part feather, part something else—that sparkled with teeny flecks of color.
My mind raced as I touched the being. I began to get excited because I realized that this was a real angel. Then it dawned on me that other people must have seen such creatures before, and that’s why they’re depicted with feathered wings. A deep, resonant humming sound came from within the angel, enveloping me in absolute peace, acceptance, and love as I relaxed into a complete state of awe and wonder at what was happening.
The angel walked with me down a corridor of huge trees (which were unlike earthly ones) into an open place where there were ten more beings. I was completely unnerved as the one that was carrying me tossed me into the air, and they all began to hum and then laugh. At least it sounded like laughter—it was a joyful sound and strangely playful, and these 11 angels tossed me around as if I were a ball.
I was completely present but breathing more deeply than usual. At this point I stopped the massage, and Yvonne turned her head and looked at me—her deep blue eyes almost glowed for a minute, and her pupils were fully dilated. I told her, “You’ll never believe what just happened!”
She replied, “Colette, I had the most extraordinary vision that I need to share with you.” She then proceeded to tell me that when we began the massage, she went into a deep meditation, where she had a vision that I crawled beneath a huge door. She followed me under it and saw not me, but the back of a huge angelic creature. She followed it into a long corridor that opened up into a courtyard where there were many more angels standing in a circle. She said that the one she’d followed had a newborn in its arms, and they all took turns holding the baby and tossing it in the air as it gurgled and laughed. She found herself wondering where she was, but the beings disappeared in a cloud of dazzling violet and white smoke. She turned her head and found herself back on the table looking up at me.
I was flabbergasted, but this was enough for me to realize that it wasn’t just a dream that I’d conjured up or fabricated. I trusted with every fiber of my being that what I’d experienced was real, and I knew that I would be altered in some way. From that day forward, my readings began to have a different, enhanced sense of spirituality to them, and more people started to find out about me through word of mouth. Even now, whenever I’m in doubt, I remember my angel. And when I recall that experience, I’m reminded that I have the power to help people, and I’m not alone.
No matter how hard I tried to cajole the universe into connecting me to my angel, I had no further visitations for a couple of years. Then something happened: For three consecutive nights, I saw a face looking at me as I fell asleep: Once I saw a benevolent and smiling Jesus; another time I saw an Indian sage with dark skin and flowing white robes; and a third time I clearly saw Mary Magdalene, who spoke to me, saying, “I am the Magdalene, named Mary. Remember the goddess”—and then disappeared.
A week later, while I was making myself comfortable before my morning meditation, my little dog, Gizmo, marched over to me and stared into my eyes. He sat down on my lap just as I about start, and I decided to let him stay there, closing my eyes.
I don’t know how long it took, but as soon as I settled into my meditation, I was transported back to the grainy, light-filled place that I knew as the peripheral dimension. I was sitting at the edge of the same crystal mountain I’d seen when I met my angel. I could feel an amazing sense of calm protection as the wing of my angel enveloped me. I asked it, “Where have you been? Why haven’t you come before now?” And in a wordless hum I heard, Have faith and trust in me—I am always here. Then it all disappeared.
Since that day, I’ve never doubted the existence of angels, the connection we have to them, or any of my experiences with them. Although I still consider myself a devout skeptic, I have an unerring faith in God, goodness, and the Divine intelligence that’s around and within us. No matter how and what I need to learn in this lifetime, I trust that I’ll always be where I need to be. We must believe that when our intuition tells us to go left instead of right, it may be because an angel is waiting around the corner.