Zen Sarcasm, Part 3

1. Change is inevitable. Except from a vending machine. 2. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow. 3. Always try to be modest. And be proud of it! 4. A clear conscience is a sign of a bad memory. 5. On the other hand, you have different fingers. 6. I feel like I'm parked diagonally in a parallel universe. 7. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. 8. Honk if you love peace and quiet. 9. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just do not have film. 10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have. - Joke shared on Beliefnet's Religious Humor page