The Queen of My Self


The holiday season brings many parties and celebrations of all sorts. And lots of occasions for dressing up and wanting to look our best at any age.

“I would tell [myself] not to be so preoccupied with looking for approval from other people. You’re never going to be anybody other than who you are, and who you are is greater than [you] imagine. The way that we think creates our reality—it’s very powerful. I would say to a young girl who’s feeling insecure about her looks, ‘Stop!’ Who you are is not the way you look—who you are is who you are on the inside. There’s not a mirror in the world that can show you that. It is beautiful; it is amazing; it is awesome.”

— Phylicia Rashad


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Donna Henes is the author of The Queen of My Self: Stepping into Sovereignty in Midlife. She offers counseling and upbeat, practical and ceremonial guidance for individual women and groups who want to enjoy the fruits of an enriching, influential, purposeful, passionate, and powerful maturity. Consult the MIDLIFE MIDWIFE™

The Queen welcomes questions concerning all issues of interest to women in their mature years. Send your inquiries to